Funniest real orders you have seen in a chart? - page 34

To start things off, the best and funniest order I have seen on a chart, was in the discharge instructions for a trauma patient. It read simply Darwin Consult and was signed by the... Read More

  1. by   grace90
    Quote from ladyval
    Funniest order I saw was a pt being admitted for "lung ass" instead of mass.
    Every time I read this one, it cracks me up.

    On a pt yesterday, not one of my own, I saw an admission dx stated as "Got a problem with my arms"
  2. by   NurseyBaby'05
    Quote from Roy Fokker
    PS: Later found that some of our docs do that. Some of them are known for ordering "1 beer with dinner" or "1 beer at bed time" for some of their patients

    Every once in awhile we get an alcoholic pt that the docs will write orders for beer so they don't go through dt's. Unfortunately for the patient, the pharmacy usually only stocks "The Beast" aka Milwaukee's Best.

    The funniest real order on a chart I see all the time is "Witness Consent" and the consent is blank on the chart. No doc's signature, no pt's signature, nothing. I just do one of these: and then one of these: and see how many days in a row they will rewrite the order.
  3. by   sunflrz321
    Quote from d131jt2
    I can't think of any unsusual orders but I remember working Med-Surg Nocs in a community hospital. We would have patients who were in for "Nausea and vomiting"
    who nver showed any nsign of it. In giving report, I wondered why they hadn't been discharged. The day nurse said that their family went on vacation so the doctor admitted the person for 2 weeks. Can you imagine that happening now!!!

    Soon to be retired Judy Rae

    Yep, I saw it a few months ago. The sweet little old lady pt asked if she could stay another day, because it was lonely at home. The nurse practitioner told her "Sure, you can stay as long as you like dear. But we need an excuse why we're keeping you here another day, so if anyone asks, you're nauseous, okay?" The NP then told the pt's nurse (not me, fortunately) to give the pt Zofran. (pt had denied any pain or nausea that day).
  4. by   EmmaG
    I always liked the ones admitted with 'Eurosepsis'...

    One of our lymphoma patients was in for a long admission, and one night while watching football he commented he sure wished he had a beer. He wasn't an alcoholic, he was just a regular guy...

    I called our doc, and asked him for the order. Dr M was one of the kindest, most compassionate docs I've ever had the pleasure to work with, and he said 'of course'. "One beer, po, q hs prn, may repeat x 1"

    I went across the street and bought a six pack of ponies (so he could drink more than one lol), arranged them all nicely in an ice bucket and took them in to this guy.


    He just flipped out. Crying and laughing and said it was the greatest thing ever. Got on the phone and started calling all his family and friends, telling them what had happened. It truly made his day (and ours too). He died not long after that, but every time I saw him he talked about the night he got his wish.
  5. by   TDub
    Quote from Emmanuel Goldstein
    I always liked the ones admitted with 'Eurosepsis'...

    One of our lymphoma patients was in for a long admission, and one night while watching football he commented he sure wished he had a beer. He wasn't an alcoholic, he was just a regular guy...

    I called our doc, and asked him for the order. Dr M was one of the kindest, most compassionate docs I've ever had the pleasure to work with, and he said 'of course'. "One beer, po, q hs prn, may repeat x 1"

    I went across the street and bought a six pack of ponies (so he could drink more than one lol), arranged them all nicely in an ice bucket and took them in to this guy.


    He just flipped out. Crying and laughing and said it was the greatest thing ever. Got on the phone and started calling all his family and friends, telling them what had happened. It truly made his day (and ours too). He died not long after that, but every time I saw him he talked about the night he got his wish.


    You are a sweetheart!
  6. by   EmmaG
    Quote from TDub
    You are a sweetheart!
    Thanks, but one of the day nurses didn't see it that way. She wanted to report me to administration over that...

    Also reported to the doc when one of my co-workers bought some chewing tobacco for an old man who was dying of advanced metastatic CA. That's all the old guy wanted... so we got it for him.

    She went running up to his doc the next morning "You wouldn't BELIEVE what they did last night!!!!"

    Doc just laughed at her, "What's the problem? Are you afraid it will give him cancer??"
  7. by   TDub
    Yeah, I know... When my hospice patient are furtive about smoking, I don't feel like I can deny them one of the only self-soothing things they have left. What's it going to matter now?
  8. by   grace90
    Quote from Emmanuel Goldstein
    One of our lymphoma patients was in for a long admission, and one night while watching football he commented he sure wished he had a beer. He wasn't an alcoholic, he was just a regular guy...

    I called our doc, and asked him for the order. Dr M was one of the kindest, most compassionate docs I've ever had the pleasure to work with, and he said 'of course'. "One beer, po, q hs prn, may repeat x 1"

    I went across the street and bought a six pack of ponies (so he could drink more than one lol), arranged them all nicely in an ice bucket and took them in to this guy.


    He just flipped out. Crying and laughing and said it was the greatest thing ever. Got on the phone and started calling all his family and friends, telling them what had happened. It truly made his day (and ours too). He died not long after that, but every time I saw him he talked about the night he got his wish.
    That is SO sweet!
  9. by   VegRN
    Quote from sunflrz321
    Yep, I saw it a few months ago. The sweet little old lady pt asked if she could stay another day, because it was lonely at home. The nurse practitioner told her "Sure, you can stay as long as you like dear. But we need an excuse why we're keeping you here another day, so if anyone asks, you're nauseous, okay?" The NP then told the pt's nurse (not me, fortunately) to give the pt Zofran. (pt had denied any pain or nausea that day).

    Yes, I see this happen a lot. Mostly with pts wanting to stay another day or more because they are lonely or acutually like being away from their family, or feel safer in the hospital but have no medical need to be here. I think it is such bunk, insurance fraud. Some of the residents get mad that their attending allows this and feel the same way as we do but, what can the resident/intern do? Attending Md is the boss.
  10. by   RedWeasel
    How bout newly admitted pt that had med Dr order all his meds and daily INRs and is handling his coumadin.etc.? Very immobile pt, obese etc. High risk for those DVDs (DVTs). Anyway our rehab doc comes along and writes right below his orders. DC coumadin, and many of his other meds. Doesn't DC INRs tho. Man continues to think of cost-what is it costing him? Except maybe his pts life. Next day. Med Dr back. Coumadin restarted.
  11. by   RedWeasel
    Not really funny but Surgeon wrote, "contact me for any issues related to surgery." -We have inhouse hospitalists who ATC are available for medical care and orders. Pt was having nausea called the hospitalists at 2330 for reglan. Came in to work next day. Turns out night nurse called the hospitalists at 0300 for maalox. Surgeon in next day writes, "As ordered yesterday, will follow pt medically. DC hospitalist care." Yes of course that is exactly what you wrote yesterday, and I personally would LOVE to have woke you up at 2330 and 0300 for reglan and maalox orders> You guys tell me, how do you think he would have answered the phone at 3am for maalox oredrs?
  12. by   purple1953reading
    We had a patient admitted to tele because he needed to meet his spenddown for MEdicaid,and if he met it all at once,like a hospital stay, he did not have TO PAY it himself. He was on the light all night long, requesting food, drink, etc. WAS NOT ILL.
  13. by   LauraMarieLPN
    Quote from nurse-lou
    We had a patient once who was an alcoholic and a COPDer. The doc, a pulmonologist, would write..Black Velvet, 30cc Q6hrs,prn..I am NOT kidding either. The pharmacy had to go to the liquor store and buy a bottle of BV and then we had to keep it locked in the narc cupboard and sign out each shot of BV!!!!

    Kelly

    Very similar to your BV order.
    The M.D. wrote:
    I can beer q meal and HS.

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