Funniest real orders you have seen in a chart?

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To start things off, the best and funniest order I have seen on a chart, was in the discharge instructions for a trauma patient. It read simply

Darwin Consult

and was signed by the resident. Well the attending did laugh, but it was not the highpoint of that residents day.

so do you have more?

I think at the temp of 200, one should flip the pt over, and baste liberally

--Barbara

I'm sorry, I know this is an old post from the beginning of the thread, but this one made me spit soda!

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We had a resident write an order for a harp player.

My dad was in tele a couple of years ago for GI bleed. I went to visit and found a harp player right outside his door, and my dad was in bed with very wiiiiide eyes.

(Can you see where this is going?)

I said something about the harp sounding so pretty, and he was so relieved! He thought he was hearing the harps of the Pearly Gates!

Okay, my contribution: many years ago we had a doc working the ER that we all serioiusly questioned whether or not her license was legit. She ordered an HCG on a 90-something woman who came in with sudden vag bleeding.

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Specializes in ortho/neuro/general surgery.
"1 Liter NS, IV Push"

I am still looking for a syringe large enough for that order.

Oh, rats, ya mean I can't cut the end of the IV bag, empty the solution into 2 styrofoam cups and give it to the pt to drink? ;)

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To start things off, the best and funniest order I have seen on a chart, was in the discharge instructions for a trauma patient. It read simply

Darwin Consult

and was signed by the resident. Well the attending did laugh, but it was not the highpoint of that residents day.

so do you have more?

Not an order, but a diagnosis: "Transient episodes of sudden death." The pt had sleep apnea so the diagnosis made sense. But the billing department went into melt down.

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My mother-in-law recalls the early days when she worked in a county hospital. Many of their patients were chronic alcoholics and giving them a shot of whiskey was a routine part of their duties. That kept everyone happy.

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Transgender pt. male to female was admitted to our psych unit. M.D. knew that the pt. had already had a sex change but still ordered....Serum HCG! His rationale: so other pt's wouldn't know she used to be a male????????

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Fleece enema stat---:lol2:

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diet coke for a very fat man

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Specializes in ICU,CCU, MICU, SICU, CVICU, CTSICU,ER.

0245 ED. female pt c/o allergic reaction on chest and back. Claims it's her bra. Pt presents bra to RN (me); it was the oldest bra I've ever seen! Grey, no more elastic, and very tattered. Of course she reeked of ETOH. When I spoke to the doc he went and saw her, came out and handed me her script while rolling his eyes. Rx read "buy a new bra"! I couln't keep a straight face and had to wait 15 minutes to compose myself before I discharged her.

:lol2:

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Specializes in picc certified.

vwerbal order from anestesia on arrival to pacu "watch breathing" uhhhhh no ***** sherlock

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Specializes in Pulmonology/Critical Care, Internal Med.

I was doing my psych rotations the other day and saw in a pt.s chart "same **** different day, and she threw a chicken sandwich at me". When I saw that, I laughed so hard I couldn't breath

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When I received a patient from ER the diagnosis was "fell in a creek". The patient was an IV drug abuser who had overdosed on Heroin and fell in a ravine.

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