Resigning....Retaliation a BIG possibility! What do I do????? - page 2

Situation over.... Read More

  1. by   cindyrn1
    Just because I have had a few bad experiences does not mean that I need counseling. Why does some of you think this is all about me? If you had read some of my posts, you would have noticed that I have not been in hospital nursing since I graduated in 1987. Everything is new to me and everything that goes on in a hospital is new to me. I was the boss in my other career field. I made the decisions and I took care of whatever needed to be done. I was good at what did. I admitted that I was not good at medical nursing, but I tried! Thank you for your insight, but I do not need counseling because I just lost my job. I may need someone to talk to after reading what you and fiesty nurse wrote though. I already feel like a zero and you just made me feel even worse. I don't know what's wrong with some nurses, but we are suppose to be caring and forgiving people and it's clear that some nurses just aren't capable of that.





    Quote from Baby Catcher
    I agree with fiesty nurse. Get counseling. Just because you are a psych nurse does not mean you don't need help. I'm an OB nurse but that doesn't mean I never need to see an OB/GYN. Good luck.
  2. by   NursesRmofun
    Quote from cindyrn1
    after all that worrying about resigning and leaving my job in a lurch, i was just told that i just didn't fit in with the staff i worked with. what kind of reason is that for letting someone go?????? i was doing exceptionally well a few days ago and i had been working so many extra shifts to help out and then all of a sudden this afternoon, i am told to take all my personal belongings and meet my supervisor in the front of the hospital. i was let go because a few nurses (my supervisors pets) said i wasn't being a team player (i was told by my supervisor to keep to myself and work so that others couldn't say i was saying things when i wasn't). one nurse told my ex supervisor that i was freaking out with a new surgery patient today when i was not!!!!!!!!!!!! this ex supervisor took a bunch of hateful, clickish nurses rumors and fired me for hear say! she promised verbally that she would not turn in my license and that they would give me a nuetral reference. but it still upset me to no end that i was let go from a job where i was doing the very best that i could and because i didn't fit in their little click, i was let go. yes i wanted to resign, but you know what, they beat me to it. i just can't believe they couldn't give me a concrete reason for letting me go. anyways, i am severely depressed right now, crying my eyes out and questioning myself as to if i am really a good person or even a good nurse anymore. i am really beginning to hate nursing anymore. i just don't know if i am going to get over this last termination. i am feeling like i am nothing.
    what do you mean turn in your license? report you to the state?
    you did get solid advice here for the future....always give two weeks notice and try to stay as emotion-less as possiblle. i had to quit a job recently, and it took all the strength i had to not tell my boss off.
  3. by   NursesRmofun
    Quote from cindyrn1
    just because i have had a few bad experiences does not mean that i need counseling. why does some of you think this is all about me? if you had read some of my posts, you would have noticed that i have not been in hospital nursing since i graduated in 1987. everything is new to me and everything that goes on in a hospital is new to me. i was the boss in my other career field. i made the decisions and i took care of whatever needed to be done. i was good at what did. i admitted that i was not good at medical nursing, but i tried! thank you for your insight, but i do not need counseling because i just lost my job. i may need someone to talk to after reading what you and fiesty nurse wrote though. i already feel like a zero and you just made me feel even worse. i don't know what's wrong with some nurses, but we are suppose to be caring and forgiving people and it's clear that some nurses just aren't capable of that.
    sorry, i did not catch that either. but i have no judgement as to you needing counseling! i don't know you! it took guts to try soemthing new and different. do something that you are comfortable doing. sometimes doing soemthing new is way too much stress! please try not to be down on yourself! none of us are good at everything! good luck!
    Last edit by NursesRmofun on Mar 27, '04 : Reason: correct spelling
  4. by   traumaRUs
    Cindy - I feel sorry for you, but honestly - you do sound like you're the victim. Everyone will agree that there are some areas of nursing where we feel very comfortable and some areas where there is no comfort level. So, in order to change out of our comfort areas, we need training, a solid orientation to the new position and perhaps some additional education. I hope your corrections nursing career goes fine and that you enjoy it very much.
  5. by   yaddadoit
    Cindy,
    Sounds like you've had a very rough time of things. I recently resigned from a position... more like was forced out of a position by things being made so uncomfortable for me. I was very miserable and for the sake of happiness had to get out of there. I know that I'm not a failure or a mess up-- but I also know that the way I was treated wasn't right. I have worked in many work situations during my nursing career. I have been in 3 different situation that were awful. On the other hand, most of my other work situations have been above average and I would be glad to return to any one of the immediately if those situations still existed. I have confidence that I'm a good nurse, I have confidence in my nursing skills, regardless of that the emotional turmoil I went through and the fact that I still get upset indicates to me that counseling would have been (and is still...) an awesome idea. Check into workplace bullying.... It is a concept that is very familiar to some outside of the US, while people in the USA are just being introduced to it. As for myself, I truly believe, that having been involved in 3 of these situations for a total of 7 years of my nearly 20 years of nursing, that, just like abused women tend to seek out the partners with the same abusive inclinations over and over, that until I get some sort of help I will have a tendency to put myself in bad work situations. As I am currently without financial resources for counseling (that's what happens when you resign and no longer have benes ) I'm trying to educate myself as much as possible so that I recognize these situations sooner and not become involved in them. I have found some great information on line concerning work place bullyism. It was very relevant to what I had to go through. Good luck to you and please do consider counseling. It's not a bad thing and it sounds like you were in a traumatic situation. Best of luck to you and I hope you find your niche!
  6. by   Hellllllo Nurse
    [QUOTE=terri0318rn]2 yrs and have had only 2 jobs. The bite to employers is they would rather terminate you so that you are severed from your benefits immediately and you can't collet unemployment because you are employable.....QUOTE]

    Yes, you can collect unemployment benefits if you are fired.

    Years ago, I applied for a manufacturing position. I was offered an inside sales job at the same company. Athough I had no experience in sales, I took the job as I was unemployed. I was fired from the job, but collected unemployment checks for three months.

    The OP should be able to collect unemployment, if the corrections job is not offered.
  7. by   cindyrn1
    I just got through checking my paycheck stubs because they have shorted my checks ever since I started working there. I have found that they once again shorted me on not only my regular check but my termination check as well. They paid me $2 less an hour! They didn't count the numerous days I was in charge or that one night I came in at 2300 to pull a 5 hour shift because they were desperate. What can I do about this hospital that not only fired me because I didn't fit in but does not pay their employees for their work?????????? As much as I hate to have to talk to my EX supervisor again, I am going to have to call her so that I can get the rest of my money due to me. I can't believe a hospital can keep running when they don't even pay their workers!
    :angryfire



    [QUOTE=Hellllllo Nurse]
    Quote from terri0318rn
    2 yrs and have had only 2 jobs. The bite to employers is they would rather terminate you so that you are severed from your benefits immediately and you can't collet unemployment because you are employable.....QUOTE]

    Yes, you can collect unemployment benefits if you are fired.

    Years ago, I applied for a manufacturing position. I was offered an inside sales job at the same company. Athough I had no experience in sales, I took the job as I was unemployed. I was fired from the job, but collected unemployment checks for three months.

    The OP should be able to collect unemployment, if the corrections job is not offered.
  8. by   BabyRN2Be
    Cindy, this is not what you want to hear but I have been following your posts and it looks to me like you could benefit from counseling. You've described some major life crisis over the past several months, and if anyone went through what you have gone through, I'd say that they would benefit from some counseling. Those who have said this are not trying to be mean, myself included. We are concerned about you, you've been through a lot. Maybe you could try some career counseling if nursing isn't working out for you.

    On your other question, I believe that you can contact the Dept. of Labor if your hospital isn't paying you what they owe you. Document EVERYTHING and have it ready to present to them. I've heard of nurses who haven't been paid overtime due to them doing this and it has worked.

    We are all concerned about you. Please consider this.
  9. by   cindyrn1
    Thank you for your kind words and words of advice. I only appreciated your suggestion because of the bible verse you included. Usually someone else can see what is going on in your life when you cannot. I will set up an appointment and find out what I can about my inability to work in a hospital setting or work as a nurse. I need something to help me in understanding what I may or may not be doing right. I blame some of the problems on the institutions that I have worked, but I must blame myself for part of the problem. You are right, I have had a very hard time in my life this past year including a major surgery, losing 2 jobs, not working for 8 months, being without money for so long and trying to raise a family. I have hated myself for so long because I feel like a failure at everything I do and I have found myself not trusting anyone about anything for fear that I am going to get hurt again. Thank you again for your words of wisdom. I will seek counseling as soon as I can to help me in the next job that I get. Have a great day.


    Quote from BabyRN2Be
    Cindy, this is not what you want to hear but I have been following your posts and it looks to me like you could benefit from counseling. You've described some major life crisis over the past several months, and if anyone went through what you have gone through, I'd say that they would benefit from some counseling. Those who have said this are not trying to be mean, myself included. We are concerned about you, you've been through a lot. Maybe you could try some career counseling if nursing isn't working out for you.

    On your other question, I believe that you can contact the Dept. of Labor if your hospital isn't paying you what they owe you. Document EVERYTHING and have it ready to present to them. I've heard of nurses who haven't been paid overtime due to them doing this and it has worked.

    We are all concerned about you. Please consider this.
  10. by   LuciGirl
    My heart goes out to individuals who have been mobbed and bullied in the workplace. Learn more about the serious issue of mobbing in the workplace. You are a victim of mobbing and like other ABUSE - it is NOT your fault! It is important to talk to someone that can help you recognize workplace abuse for what it truly is and then find proactive means to continue your work without retaliation. Support and encouragement is available.


    Best Wishes. - Luci
    Last edit by canoehead on Jul 6, '04 : Reason: advertisement
  11. by   mattsmom81
    When the problems in our lives overwhelm us we sometimes need support to do the hard self analysis...what is the problem and what can I do about it. When you said you felt like 'nothing' I feel some posters read 'depression'; hence the counseling suggestion. When I felt like this at one point, a counselor was just what I needed to help me get back on track , define the problems, and find my power again.

    (((HUGS))) to you...I stuck it out once too in a bad job situation, tried too long to make things work with vindictive people.... and got the ol' 'you can't quit you're fired' routine. I know its not fun. Medical facilities can be very toxic today. You've been through a rough patch and sending good wishes your way that things turnaround soon.
  12. by   profjanmc
    Yes, I too agree with those who said sometimes the environment is the problem. We, as nurses, have a history of eating our young alive.... I have worked OB in several local hospitals and each one is a completely different expereince even though labor is labor is labor.....Try somewhere else, if necessary move (if you can) a new environment may make a huge difference. I now work in a unit that's like family and even though my pay is less, I love where I work. Good luck to you and don't give up.
  13. by   bigfishsmallpond
    Cindy, I really feel bad for you, and can relate from both sides of the fence. I resigned one job due to a terrible eval, and pressure from a manager that I thought was a friend.I NEVER had a less than wonderful eval, and she gave me one that basically said I was worthless.In fact when I expressed surprise and stated no one had ever made these kind of comments, she said " someone should have had the balls to do this a long time ago."I didn't want to leave on a negative feeling after 13 years, but I felt so non-supported and terrible about myself that I did. No going away party, no card, nothing. I just gave my notice, and left quietly, with my self esteem under my shoes.
    Well, I got a better job, and met some great friends,but I admit I never quite got over that situation.I can understand how hurt and angry you feel.
    Now I am a mangaer, and have been in the position of firing several nurses. Believe me, it is very difficult and i do everything I can to make it professional, impersonal and NOT a horrible experience.If you were my employee, I would offer employee assistance(counseling and job reassignment),and also an honest, fair evaluation and suggestions for change .Best of luck. Don't let it destroy you.I won't be so naive as to say sometimes it is the best thing that can happen to you, but move on, learn from it, and do consider counseling to help you get through a very difficult time.

close