Why do some nurses use their titles as a big ego boost?

Nurses Relations

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Specifically talking in social settings. I understand if you're at work or at a job interview, your title needs to be specified. I have a friend who I've been doing pre-reqs with years back. Our goal was always BSN. We took different paths and now she is an RN and I just finished my LPN. I feel like she rubs it in my face alot with the distinction of LPN. Instead of asking about NCLEX, she'll say, "how was your test for LPN?" "Are you going to continue on to be an LPN?" "Are there any LPN jobs you can find?" She loves that distinction. It's petty, it's catty, it's typical female behavior and I try not to let it get the best out of me but's frustrating sometimes.

I'm sure all of you understand that not every nursing path is the same and is different. Everyone has their own goals and a difference of degree doesn't make you a better nurse. I was included in a conversation of new grads at an ICU (where my mom happens to be one of the older ones that DO take care of the young). One nurse was in her 30's and said, "Why should I get a master's? It's all preference, honestly. In the real world, people can care less about how many degrees you have. At the end of the day, you're a nurse. your co-workers judge you on how you work with everyone else...how you are with your own patients and how you are with your fellow co-workers. No one could care less about a masters"

This is what I go by and this is what drives me. If it's anything I learned in psch of mental health nursing, there's a thing called "defense mechanisms" haha (if you all remember). Sometimes people who compete are compensating for something else.... I'm not going to go there. I think it's cool when people have goals and continue on with education - more power! But it shouldn't be used to boost their own ego...

I think you should be proud of what you do, no matter what your education. There will always be a jerk that belittles you. I recently went to an orthopedic surgeon for a shoulder injury, he asked me what I did for a living after describing the specific muscles/tendons I though I injured (SLAP tear). When I said I was a nurse practitioner, he said, "so, your a nurse", and smirked. I let it slide.

Off-topic. This coming from a jerk nurse. When dealing with jerk physicians about personal health concerns, I suggest not mentioning about being a nurse. Say something else, like "hobbies" that you do....you can say gardener, auto mechanic, beauty consultant, college student, etc. Then once you go in-depth about the pathophysiology behind a disease or describe specific muscles/tendons, it will make them raise an eyebrow. Start quizzing them further and they might not be able to shake it off and give a good answer. Seen some clueless doctors out there and often times I even looked smarter than them because I explained the reasons for this or that. Try it! ;)

"Hm, you are quite knowledgeable about this. What do you do for a living?"

"Oh, I'm just a Business major in college."

Specializes in Emergency Nursing.

I saw this from the friendship perspective. We all want friends that support us and are there to cheer us on when we accomplish things. I was lucky to get a job the same week that I graduated from nursing school. Oh boy, I found out who were the real friends from school! I was pleasantly surprised to hear that people never pictured me being someone who could work on that floor and that my hospital was not a "real" hospital because it had a clean reputation (versus a "real" low income community hospital).

OP I think this person is not really your friend, unless you two have always had a competitive friendship and you both like it that way. You need to have a heart-to-heart with her.

Word. I read it like that as well. :roflmao:

I am so happy I am not the only one! LOL

I get what you are saying OP. Why not just ask how was your test, or how is the job hunt going?

My simple answer to the OP's question:

Because they worked hard to get them.

Specializes in addictions recovery, tele, peds.

Can someone pass the popcorn please :sarcastic:

Specializes in Med/surg, Quality & Risk.

Just to answer the question in the subject line, it's the same reason some people yammer on and on about their kids as if they're the second coming: to make themselves feel worth something.

No need to make you feel put down though. Have you ever asked her "why do you always say LPN instead of just nurse?" I'm trying to think of a valid reason. Maybe she's feeling bad about spending more than you on education etc. and wants to assure herself that she didn't do it all for nothing. I can see asking about LPN jobs just to gauge whether you are or are not eligible for jobs she was looking out for or something. Just grasping for straws here. Maybe she doesn't really have the intention you think she does. If she does, stop hanging out with her.

Specializes in Long term care.
So it's wrong for her to point out your differences, but it's ok for you to completely negate any work she's done that you haven't done (because it's all the same, she's apparently just stupid for putting in any extra work.)

Oh hell yes! That is exactly and completely true and wish we had a totally love button!

Specializes in Med/Surg, LTACH, LTC, Home Health.

My ex-mother-in-law did the same thing....always talking about a nurse in the neighborhood being an RN and doing well for herself. She did that for 3 years and when I finally got back into school because of economic changes, (i had been an LPN for over 20 years at that time), she started ******** about some other fault she found in me. When I graduated from college, she started calling me Little Miss Perfect. By the time I got my RN license a couple of months later, I didn't have to hear it anymore because of the divorce between me, my husband, and his REAL wife, aka Mama. Woo-Hooooo!

The only thing you can do for people who sees titles instead of human beings is increase your personal space; sometimes by miles instead of feet. I never tell anyone that I'm a nurse, RN or LPN. My mom has done so much boasting over the years that it is truly embarrassing. When I graduated from college 3 years ago and passed boards, my dad planned this humongous celebration. Mind you, I'm neatly 50 darn years old!!! So I wouldn't go. My brothers tried to force me, to no avail. So my dad changed it to include them and their accomplishments. Now the tables were turned.....they wouldn't go. We are just plan folks trying to make an honest living. So, my dad turned the event into a gigantic family reunion....that was the only way to get us to show up.

People are proud, folks! Let them have it or adjust your personal space because the ones who truly intend to insult you WILL find a way no matter what. If the OP gets the RN, then it will be "I got my RN back in 1900; when did you get yours again? Last month? :cheeky:" Don't worry about it, I say keep it moving.

Specializes in Telemetry, OB, NICU.

Because they/we work hard for it and are proud to say so. It is perfectly okay to enjoy the title if you have worked your butt off to get it. You may ask her the same questions using just changing the words "LPN" to "RN".

If you think you have worked hard too and are proud, you shouldn't have any issues. I also think you are insecure with what you got.

I have to say, and not being mean at all, that the people that always seem to have the biggest issue is the people with the lesser degree.

There is a massive difference between an LPN and an RN and the LPN's in my RN program said that they didn't understand how big the difference was until they were about 1/2 way through the RN program...now they see.

I am in graduate school and I don't think my BSN makes me a better nurse at all. I see no reason for anyone who doesn't want to get into management or leave the bedside, to get a BSN. If I didn't aspire to do more, I can assure you, I wouldn't have bothered.

However, when people ask me what I do, I say, "I'm an RN"...because there IS a distinction between what I do versus an LPN. I never say that I have a BSN. However, I worked with an LPN that never seemed to want to tell anyone she was an LPN. She always tells everyone she is a "nurse" and while true, there is a huge assumption that she is an RN because she works in a critical care unit, and trust me...she knows it.

Needless to say, she is a difficult person to work with on top of it.

Specializes in OB/GYN.
No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.

I just told my daughter the other day when someone was mean to her at school. Those people who have to make others feel bad to make themselves feel better have very low self esteem and feel very bad about themselves.

I also told her that real friends celebrate their friends accomplishments whether getting a job as a sanitation engineer or CEO at some fortune 500 company.

Consider the source and move on.....:)

This is very true and good advice!

I would say be proud of your own accomplishments in becoming an LPN. LPN's fulfill an important role as nurses. RN's have more education and training, and have their own role, but that does not diminish LPN's. The point is to become/be a good nurse, whatever kind of license you hold. We all do valuable work. Whatever your friend's intentions, don't allow yourself to feel undermined by her comments. You worked hard to earn your license, and your education and training are valuable to you and to your patients. You are not a lesser person because you are an LPN versus your friend who is an RN, although your scope of practice is more restricted because you have less education and training. As several people pointed out, you are free to advance your education and training as your circumstances permit, and whether or not you continue on to become an RN there is nothing to stop you reading and learning about medicine/nursing, taking CEU courses etc. Become the best LPN you can be, and don't worry about other people letting you know about their titles.

Absolutely agree!! And OP, your "thing" seems to be psych nursing. LPN's play a very valuable role in this area. I like that as well. And don't find the need at this moment in time to go any further with a degree as I currently am a vital role in the type of nursing I enjoy. If that changes, I will certainly explore options. Your friend's goals require her to have a higher degree. More power to her, but for you, if you love what you do then WOO HOO! You both obtained your goals.

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