I'm so ANGRY!!! - page 2

This post is about my fiance.... we both went to nursing school together, both got the same grades...we graduated in june and took the NCLEX in July (both studied using saunders)..... I passed and... Read More

  1. by   steelcityrn
    Kevin, Your Fiance Must Have Test Anxiety......try A Massage Tx, Avoid Caffeine, Have Her Take A Tylenol Pm Night Before To Sleep Well,if Ok To Take. She Knows The Answers, But Gets So Stressed She Probably Second Guesses Herself.....loads Of Best Wishes
  2. by   KEVIN88GT
    Just checking... How many times can one test? We live in ny. Im pretty sure its indefinite until you pass but am i right?
  3. by   redwinggirlie
    Quote from Bipley
    I used to teach so I'm here to tell you that some folks just aren't test takers. It has absolutely nothing in the world with not knowing the information, they do. They just start to stress over a test and the more important the test, the more stress they feel. Often times they don't have the slightest idea how stressed they are. They really believe they feel fine but they aren't. Stress causes anxiety, anxiety causes people to read the questions different from what they are. They miss subtle things, plurals, they read something as saying one thing when it says quite another.

    I'd have a student that could answer every bloody question I had and did beautifully. Call it a test and the same person can't do it.

    My heart really goes out to you both. Please tell her to hang in there, she darn sure isn't the only one. It will happen, it's just going to take another shot.
    Yours is the best response anyone could give. To the poster and your fiance: I wish you the best.
  4. by   GingerSue
    would a tutor help?
  5. by   gauge14iv
    No tylenol pm or bendryl the night before - that stuff hangs around for 24 hours and knocks a few IQ points off temporarily!

    I have a classmate who has EXTREME test anxiety - Im talking palpitations, chest pain, dyspnea, the whole nine yards. Her doc put her on a beta blocker PRN. She only uses them whenever she is going to take a test or give a speech, but they work great for her. In cases of extreme anxiety it is certainly worth discussing with your doctor. You definately don't want anything that makes you woozy or that you would have to take all the time, but some folks would not be appropriate candidates for beta blockers either. Talk to your doc!!!! Not all medication for anxiety is addictive or a psych med.
  6. by   pricklypear
    Quote from Jerico
    I used to miss questions because I'd read too much into them.

    When I took the NCLEX, after I read each question, the first thing I'd ask myself was:

    "What principle of nursing are they trying to see if I know"?

    Safety?
    Hemodynamics?
    A certain disease?

    Then I'd answer it BASED on WHAT (I thought) they were trying to find out I was competent at.
    I think this is the key for your fiancee. She obviously KNOWS the material. She probably knows way more than she needs to. I think it's partly test anxiety, as others have mentioned, but mostly her method of reading and answering the question. I figured out quickly that the correct answers on NCLEX were not always the most logical or "right" answers. What we might do in the real world is not the answer they want. You have to figure out which answer THEY want you to choose, instead of the one that's "right."

    I took a 3 day course after I graduated. I don't think it was Kaplan, but I can't remember what it was called. The first day we briefly went over basic stuff, systems, med classes, etc. The rest of the course was totally geared to teach us to recognize what NCLEX wanted. It taught key words in the questions and answers. We learned to analyze the questions. It really had nothing to do with nursing knowledge per se, but, as someone else pointed out, critical thinking. I'm not sure I would have passed without that class, because I would have been answering based on my nursing knowledge, and looking for the most logical, or "real world" answer. I answered a lot of questions contrary to my first instinct, and passed at 75.

    Anyway, this class guaranteed a pass. If you attended all 3 days of the class, you could take it as many times as you needed, with personalized help, until you passed. I just wish I could remember what the program was called. Please convey all of our support to you fiancee! I can't imagine how frustrated and upset she must be.
  7. by   Jo Dirt
    Even though you're upset that your fiance is having a hard time with the NCLEX, it really isn't fair to refer to some of your classmates who passed as "imbeciles."
    If they were *that* stupid they would not have made it through school and passed the NCLEX.
    Don't displace your anger on them.
  8. by   pricklypear
    Unfortunately, I don't think you have to be particularly bright to pass NCLEX. You just have to know how to answer the question. Most of the nurses I know who had trouble passing were extremely smart, maybe too smart. That's why they read too much into the questions. They were analyzing from the intellectual/logical direction.
  9. by   nurse4theplanet
    I agree with all the previous posters meaning that I think there are a multitude of issues that are subconsciously holding her back at this point...number one being anxiety (I think consulting a doc would be best to address this one, because she cannot identify that she is stressed...i.e. she feels fine, but performs poorly). Also, not understanding what the question is really asking or reading too much into it. The majority of questions that I miss in school are due to this fact. And lastly, perhaps a little inferiority complex and depression has set in because she has seen you and other classmates pass on a first time attempt, and now she will be on her third....that can't be good for her self-esteem or confidence in her reasoning ability.

    You sound as if you are being really supportive and I hope you continue. I am sure that this is mentally and emotionally frustrating to you both. Hang in there. Continue to be supportive and encourage her to keep trying.

    I have heard of a review called the Hurst Review. I have not taken it as I am a year away from the NCLEX...but others have said they like it.

    One final note...maybe she is OVER studying?! Too many different review books can lead to conflicting information (I had 5 diff NCLEX books at the beginning of this semester...I picked my fave one and am now doing better on my tests.)
  10. by   fronter
    Quote from KEVIN88GT
    I dont understand how people who were complete IMBESILS that were in our graduating class (I mean they were barely passing exams and asked the DUMBEST questions in class) passed the NCLEX from the first time.
    I understand your anger! But, this is totaly inappropriate to call your classmates IMBESILS. :angryfire I'm sure you're still lerning how to apply splint in the ER and nobody calls you IMBESIL. Maybe your classmates will be better nurses than you and your fiance. Stay down to earth buddy, you'll fall on your nose many times, especially in NY ER. BTW, congartulations on your nursing licence. Hopefully, after you learn how to apply splint and than push your first Atropine, you want be as tough on new grads as you are on your classmates.

    Please, tell your fiance, she'll pass as soon as she stops thinking of other IMBESILS passing boards. She needs to admit her failure in order to find out real weaknesses, focus on them and fix 'em. At this point she is not safe to practice nursing. She failed test 3 times that will kill nobody if she makes mistake. Face it! It'll make her a better nurse. Sorry!

    Passing NCLEX is just the beginning of real tests that you'll pass or fail. If you admit your mistakes than you'll learn out of your mistakes and save life or two next time. Got it?

    Psst, maybe they are laughing behind your back in the ER, who knows?
    New grad, Mr. KnowItAll...


    Have a litle respect, at least to people you know, classmates. You've spend two years of your life with them. Don't call them IMBESILS. This is a shame for you and your school.

    I hope you understand my point...
  11. by   mtnmom
    my prayers are with you and your fiance. I can understand your frustration but please try and channel it in some other direction than anger...that is always a destructive emotion.

    You state that it is your fiance...so I assume you two are planning a wedding in the near future? that can be extremely stressful in and of itself. Add to that impending changes in residence, uncertainty about jobs perhaps...just fuel for the fire of anxiety. Oh, and need I mention the holidays....as wonderful as they are they are very stressful with all there is to do.

    Like some previous posters have said perhaps a physician could recommend something like a beta blocker if not contraindicated. She could maybe practice deep breathing and relaxation techniques. Certain types of music will aid in relaxation...and also can be good learning aids as well. I have a relaxation CD by Janalea Hoffman that I use when reviewing really difficult material for a test that helps me relax, focus and learn - I think it helps me.

    Doesnt Kaplan offer free repeat if their course does not provide a passing grade? Seems like I remember hearing that in the past.

    My best advice is to try and focus on the things you have to be thankful for this holiday season...each other, your families, that you finished nursing school, and so on!! Once the holidays have passed, that stress at least will be gone.

    You are obviously both very bright people. I think that there are often reasons as yet to be revealed why things do not work out in one's favor at a particular time. Sometimes at a future date you can look back and realize that there was indeed a positive side to an otherwise negative occurrence. Maybe it is as simple as she just does not need to be committing to a new RN position right now...it is not for me to know. However, I am confident that she will pass.

    may the peace of the season be with you.
  12. by   gauge14iv
    As for referring to classmates as Imbeciles - I support the OP - we had the three most likely to lose a license pegged long before graduation. Guess what? ALL of them lost their licenses within 4 years of passing the NCLEX.

    I also know very good nurses who had to retake the NCLEX and have never had so much as a brush with the board...

    Don't take offense if you aren't in his shoes - it's nothing personal and there is no reason to take it that way - unless of course you are SURE he is talking about you!!!!
  13. by   Jolie
    My standard answer whenever I read a post like this is to recommend that your girlfriend go back to her school of nursing and request their help in preparing for and passing the NCLEX.

    She undoubetdly spent a young fortune on tuition and fees in nursing school, passed her courses, performed satisfactorily in her clinicals, has done everything under the sun to prepare for her examinations, and yet still has come up short. It is my opinion that her school shares some responsibility for seeing her thru this. After all, they gladly accepted her money all those years. I imagine that they are concerned with their NCLEX pass rates, and having a student repeatedly fail doesn't help them any.

    Encourage her to contact the director of her nursing program and request an appointment. Someone there should be willing and able to tutor her (at no additional expense!)

    Best of luck!

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