I'm New Here--I need encouragement :(

  1. hey guys!

    i have been reading the comments on this website for a long time now but i only registered to be a member two days ago hoping that i will find the encouragement that i badly need right now. i am an emotional wreck because i just found out that i failed nclex. this came as a shock to me because i never thought that i will be one of those who will fail it the first time. i was always the smart one, the good student who did not have problems with school or tests. i cannot believe i failed it and now, i don't have an inch of confidence in myself. i lost my job (which i love so much) because of this and i don't know how to deal with this. i was never defeated ever in my life and because of this, i don't know how i'm gonna get through this. please tell me that there is life after failing it the first time, and that failing the nclex won't reflect my being a good nurse in the future (my preceptors during orientation told me i was one of the best new grads they had)......sucks so much but i feel like a total failure...........

    please share your stories...i need them....thanks!
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  2. 24 Comments

  3. by   P_RN
    You are not a total failure. The stress placed on new nurses is awful. If you haven't already done so, look into an NCLEX prep course. Do a search here and you will find many others who have the same story. Also look at one of our members Suzanne4 's posts. She is quite helpful in your situation.
  4. by   Tweety
    My manager failed the first time, lots of people have and have gone on to be good nurses. I'm sorry. Good luck.
  5. by   UM Review RN
    Develop the skill now to be resilient. Teach yourself how to bounce back fast because if ever a job demanded resilience, nursing is it.

    Take a prep course, study, remember your ABC's, and go take it again. And again. And again.

    Please.

    I can tell from your post that you're the type to do whatever it takes, and nursing needs nurses like that.

    Please keep us updated, so we can congratulate you when you pass.:icon_hug:
  6. by   Roy Fokker
    Hi serendipity,

    You're not a "failure" because you fail a test.
    You're a failure if you GIVE UP!

    You know you're smart. You know you're talented.
    Yes, you failed to pass the test first time around. But do you know something? A lot of smart people don't make it through the NCLEX first time around.

    This doesn't mean that they are stupid. Nor does it mean that those who passed the NCLEX are lucky.

    It merely means that different people react to the test differently

    Have courage. Have faith.
    Work on your preparation and I see no reason why you should fail!

    :icon_hug:
  7. by   rrivera2
    I agree with the advice to learn to be resilient, now. From what you wrote, it sounds like most things have come easy to you. This is your chance to learn about temporary setback, tenacity, persistence, and fortitude, in the midst of sorrow, shock, and disbelief. These are qualities you want to develop in yourself to push you through the most difficult times you will face. Take a course like Kaplan if you can. Learn how to evaluate the questions that have answers that you don't know. Learn the test-taking strategies to work through the questions logically and systematically. You can do it.umpiron:
    Ruth
  8. by   vamedic4
    Serendipity,

    Try not to be so hard on yourself. First of all, you SUCCESSFULLY made it through nursing school. Whether it seemed hard for you or not, you are above the curve. You successfully completed your clinicals, and you're on your way to becoming an RN.
    As Roy said, a lot of smart people don't pass on their first try...heck, I know for a fact that the NCLEX is wayy harder than PALS, and you'd be amazed at how many RNs fail THAT class. Don't despair. Take other's recommendations and prepare for the next exam. Take a prep course.
    I remember as a 16 year old EMT student, had a 93 average in the class...failed the state test. Ouch. But I got back up on my horse and took another class-pass. As a medic I failed a practical station for my National Registry..thought it was the end of the world...back a month later...pass.
    This is an uncertain time for you but YOU CAN DO THIS!!!!

    Keep your chin up, you have absolutely nothing to feel ashamed of. You'll get it next time.

    Never, ever lose faith in yourself. It's too hard to get it back.

    vamedic4
    Wishing you the best :wink2:
  9. by   TooBeacon
    Don't feel like a failure after failing the NCLEX for the first time. I too did not succeed but I made it through. When I failed the exam I thought that I was the dumbest person on the planet and I couldn't believe that I made it through nursing school. I couldn't understand how I failed considering I studied (really studied) everyday and I knew all the information by heart. It upset me even more that my friends who barely studied passed! Remember, the NCLEX doesn't measure your nursing knowledge or skill, but your test-taking ability. The questions are meant to be confusing and are meant to "trick" you. Take Kaplan. I took a Kaplan review course and it really helped out. The course is pricy but I felt it was well worth it. If you do take Kaplan do the disk that comes along with it. Also, don't focus on studying the material in full detail. You know all that stuff. You just have to do as much questions as much as possible to get used to the way the questions are asked. It will feel like a guessing game but like I said, the test is meant to trick you. There is life after failing. I have not been discriminated by my peers and have in fact moved up in the field of nursing within the same year of failing the exam. Remember, the exam does not justify how great of a nurse you are. Good luck. I know you can do it and I can't wait to hear the results.

    Too
  10. by   serendipity05
    I knew that joining this site will give me the encouragement that I needed. It is very refreshing to know that there are people who understand how hard it is to be in this profession or at least "start" being in this profession. I never thought of being a nurse but now that I am, (minus the license--which I know I will have soon!!!), I could not imagine myself being something else. I want this so bad and you guys are right..I will do everything in my power to pass the second time. Please do me a favor guys, I know you all don't know me, but I would like to ask you all if you could say a prayer for me that I gain my confidence back and that I have all the strength that I need. It is true that I always had things come easy for me, but hey, this is the real world, time to be a big girl and face the challenges that life has to offer. I am sure that this experience will help me inspire people in the future. I can't wait to surpass this, I can't wait to tell all of you that finally, I passed. Please pray for me. Thanks for all your replies....It means so much to me right now more than anything...God bless all of you.....
  11. by   suebird3
    Welcome to allnurses.com. I moved your post to the NCLEX Forum, where you will get more responses re: your NCLEX experience.

    Good luck....you will do it!

    Suebird
  12. by   Chiefy
    As you've seen from previous post--you are not alone. I failed my first attempt at the NCLEX. The devastation is not even bearable. That day I saw the word "fail" was the worst. My 4 year old was here with me and tried so hard to comfort me. She was the best--to put up with my crying. People started showing up at my house--would have thought someone died. I allowed myself a week of self pity. Pulled it together and started over. I was able to nail it my second time.

    Take some time to yourself. Think about your study plan. Technique for answering. I bought the Kaplan question bank. Loved it!!!

    But continue to move on--you can do this and you will.
  13. by   luv2shop19mall
    let me tell you something.. i feel the same way. whether its for the lvn or rn we are all on the same boat. i failed it 4xs! imagine how much of a devastation that is. hey but sometimes failure for people is for the better. i mean i think thats what opened me up to even strive harder and with sharing these thoughts i h ope that you will not loose your confidence .. i have lost hope and confidence. sometimes i feel like im happy and sad. i have a job that has nothing to do with nursing and behind on all my bills, short on my paycheck. im basically living paycheck to paycheck right now. im depending on this for my future. well good luck to you and please dont feel that way. i think you just need to hang out with your friends, family , and loved ones are the ones that understand start to finish.. i have close friends and family that helped me out through my failure .. they did not put me down and they know that i studied so much .. all you have to do is put the past away. think about it paying off. really. take time off and dont think of the negativity. really im also a negative person . it may not sound like it but i am .. i felt hopeless also but after reading a lot of the comments on here. made me feel even better.. this is my only way of sharing my stories and sorry its so long. .you can always write to me and pm me. im willing to help and give suggestions even though i cant help myself .. maybe this will stick to my head. take care.
  14. by   serendipity05
    It's been 2-3 weeks since I found out that I failed. I want to believe that I am better, but I still have my "episodes" of crying and feeling worthless. It just sucks to "fail" for the first time in my life when this is really all I've been preparing for. Right now, I don't know how to study for it or not study for it, I just don't know.....But one thing that I am very thankful for is that my employer has been very supportive. They are doing everything to keep my job for me, they are even willing to wait because according to them (my manager and preceptors), I am one of the best that they've had....This comment just made my heart sing, but then again, it is very hard to get over the feeling of being a failure. So hard.....I just can't wait for this to be over....I can't be sad anymore, it's so hard. Thanks for your reply though, I appreciate it.

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