Why the double standard. - page 4
So I work in a busy ER. When a male nurse has a female patient who needs a pelvic, foley or straight cath the men automatically come to us female nurses without even a conversation with the patient /... Read More
Apr 25I see a classic example in the differences in male and female communication here. to quote the OP " If I ask a male nurse (even the ones who just had you do a female foley) they look at me like I am not only crazy but I am being lazy and trying to get out of work and push it off onto them. " HOW DO YOU KNOW THIS. Did the males, as you seem to be referring to more than one here, tell you this??? Or did you just assume a certain look implied what might be common from another female nurse. Men generally don't do subtle and don't take, get hints. You need to straight up ask each of these males why they are not reciprocating the favors.... This is a great time to do some education and problem solving. say "When I ask you if you will do a male cath for me, you give me a look that makes me feel _______________. Is your intent to say that I am just being lazy and trying to get out of work, or did you mean something else?"
Guys usually don't do "the look" either. My ex-wife has a PhD in "the look" however.....
BTW when a male says Fine (dennotative) it has the exact opposite meaning of when a female says Fine....
May 3As with anything in life, the double standards go both ways. Why is it that no matter how heavy my caseload is on any given day in the ER, females ALWAYS come to me first for a boost, turn, etc. on a heavy patient? I can't remember the last shift I worked where I didn't leave with a sore back.
I offer my female patients the choice. If they choose no, I do a task for the RN I ask while she is doing the Foley - line, dressing, etc. Under no circumstances will I go into a female room alone and pull the curtain for ANYTHING - I will be in plain sight at all times if I am alone. Was advised of this by another ER male on my first day. Any time that curtain gets pulled, a female chaperone is there, and the patient is specifically instructed why they are present. Haven't had an accusation yet.
Side note - I take another RN in when doing any foley, if possible. Frankly, it's just easier. The other RN and I can knock out a Foley on both of our patients faster than if we had did each alone.