Standing out in nursing school

~Mi Vida Loca~RN, ASN, RN · Mar 14, 2011

I just want to comment on one part of this post. The rest of it I am trying to tell myself it's simply a vent.

Regardless of the fact that the kids are getting help and that is good. It still is a sad situation and there is nothing wrong with seeing the sadness in it. It's a part of empathizing. I felt a lot of sadness for the kids I saw. Especially the ones that would probably never go anywhere, they were in really bad situations, they weren't able to get the help they needed and the mental health facility they were at was just a pit stop to a very bad situation they were going to be thrown right back into. Was I glad they were getting a temporary out and the help they needed? Absolutely! But the whole situation was still sad and my heart ached for them. There is nothing wrong with that.

I don't even get how the stuff you talked about is considered prudish :|

CuriousMe · Mar 14, 2011

OP: I get that this is a vent and all.....but you sound really angry. I get the rough around the edges thing, I tended that way myself when I was younger. But angry and rough around the edges are very different things. Is there someone you could talk to at school....maybe a counselor?

Emilynn09 · Mar 14, 2011

In your psych rotation, can't you just nicely ask them not to follow you because you aren't comfortable with it instead of getting so angry about it? I bet they don't even know it bothers you so much.

It sounds like maybe you might need to work on your patience just a little.

BeenThereDoneThat74, MSN, RN · Mar 14, 2011

Yeah, I'm not sure I really get the "prude" thing either. Are you referring to people who are naive? If so, you gotta remember we all come into nursing school with different levels of life experience, as well as common sense (or lack of).

I am so sorry that you have such a negative attitude about your classmates. I mean this in all seriousness: do you have similar feelings about others in your life (co-workers, friends, etc)? My point is, we all have people in our lives we may find "annoying", that we have to deal with. And once you become an RN, it May be a daily occurrence. I hope you can find some coping strategies to help you deal with people you don't share commonalities with.

Maybe you are just very stressed right now, as are most nursing students

dudette10, MSN, RN · Mar 14, 2011

There were a few people who used to talk to me that no longer do and I have no idea why.

Really?

If you hate them as much as this vent indicates, it probably shows through, regardless of how much you think you're covering it up.

Tyler77 · Mar 14, 2011

I understand your frustrations as I've been through this nonsense in nursing school. Believe me, tha tlike me, you WILL NOT have many friends in your classes, but, hey, I'd rather be the "loner" than have to deal with the fakes and phonies. The ones that are like "Awww my patient said that I was the best nurse they've ever had", and the ones that text, chat during class, and treat nursing school as a joke are the ones that are going to have a rude wake-up call when (and if) they get out there in the "real world." Nurses don't take any drama form newbie hires, and those are the ones that will be leaving work in tears every day. In other words, just do your thing and enjoy the ride. Look. Observe. These dramatic high school cliques have ZERO---- ZERO tolerance out there. It's just a matter of time.

If students are following you during psych clinicals and not dealing with their assigned patients, you need to speak up to the instructor. How he/she hasn't caught on at this point seems like a mystery to me. Those students need to pass clinicals by dealing with THEIR OWN patients, not following you around like a homeless animal. Next time it happens, just say, "I really need to see my patient alone. I really am uncomfortable with you following me and it's interfering with I need to do. If you have an issue with your patients, you need to see teacher. Excuse me now."

Just remember, when nursing school is over, you won't have to deal with these miserable fakes EVER AGAIN. The light is at the end of the tunnel. So there's no need to get worked up over soemthing that you know ill be over soon. If I were to say "JKust grin and bear it" that would be too much of a syrupy sweet answer because obviously their behavior ignores you. YOU 'RE in charge of your emotions, and just "filter out" what annoys you. If their dumb ancedotal stories annoy you in class, use that time to review some notes so you can drown out their "life altering" stories. Eventually the teacher will see how far he/she is falling behind and will curb these diversions.

That Guy, BSN, RN, EMT-B · Mar 15, 2011

EDIT: this was mean and would not go over well.

CBsMommy · Mar 15, 2011

Wow. I second the idea that you need to go talk to someone.

I see children in the pysch facilities and medical facilities and have a lot of empathy for them as well. I think what you are trying to say is a lot of them are getting help, which is a great thing. HOWEVER, it's still really sad that they need help in the first place. A lot of children in this world shouldn't have to see and live through some of the things these children have and yes, it's sad.

As for your other classmates...why would you let them affect you as much as they do? You really HATE them enough that you would quit school? Why? Going to school is for such a short time and then when you leave, you never have to see these people again. Why let them have so much control over your life, emotions, attitude? You can't control them (how they act or their feelings), however, you can control the way you respond. If you brush them off, you will feel a lot less like exploding.

By the way, are you going to let the patients affect you as much as your classmates? I can tell you, there are going to be some really big PITA patients. You are going to have to learn how to deal.

UumiNurseX · Mar 15, 2011

Ok let me clear one thing up. I had NO idea so many people didn't know what a prude was so let me give you an example, lol:

A prude is by no means a compliment. A goody-two shoes, a suck-up, a student, STUDENT who will tell you that you are wrong for thinking the way you do or that your opinion is heartless and cold, your techniques of communication are too harsh and you're frightening the patient, stuff like that. And I don't mean the whole class people, lol. Im just saying the majority. As for the people that I said do not talk to me they were talking to me a few hours after I wrote my post! They just told me they'd been stressed lately and it was evident. Both girls are married and one of them hadn't been in lectures as of late and she explained she had a lot of things going so that's cleared. As far the other thing about a student trying to critique my therapeutic communication technique....for me it's like this: Im not going to talk to an elderly patient like a baby and I hate it when people do that. These are elderly people who have kids that have kids that are older than we are. So we were doing rotation for care of the elderly and my patient was an elderly man, a very nice gentleman who needed little assistance but mostly someone to talk to. This classmate came to my area and was sitting as if she were waiting for a patient to come to her, lol. She eavesdropped on our conversation and after the man went to the bathroom she goes off saying, "hey why do you talk to him like that, he's an elderly person you need to be more gentle". I said, "gentle like what? Am I supposed to say goo-goo gah-gah?" The way I addressed him....."How are you doing today sir? You can pick a spot where you want to sit and we can chat it up, tell me what brought you here, what kind of things do you like to do"? I guess its my tone because I found NOTHING wrong with what I was saying. I asked the instructor to please find something for that particular student to do because she was bothering my patient and I. It's just a trend that they are assertive in the classroom and Im more assertive in clinical....where it really counts and when we get there they try to use me as a safety net especially in Psych clinical. In med-surg clinical I have spoken up but after tomorrow, it will be known how I feel as far as Psych clinical goes. The instructor was sitting right there the last clinical when the girl kicked the back of my chair because she feels I was engaging the patient too much. This is exactly what she told the instructor.....WHILE SITTING BEHIND ME REFUSING TO TALK TO ANY PATIENTS. And we were on acute unit that day and she was scared ******** but I was talking to half the room, lol. This group I am with is sad! And I don't feel like that behavior is necessary. The patient's curse and they are gasping and clutching their heads, "oh no I can't believe she said that!" Another patient standing in front of the nurses' station arguing with the nurse about going home and she was obviously agitated and as soon as we leave the floor here they go: "Oh gawd Im glad we left she could have gotten violent and we're not safe; oh no she was sounding so upset I hope the nurse is ok; Im glad we were standing on the other side of the wall, blah blah blah!" Lol. Its all so funny to me that people are like that but at the same time it irritates me and no Im not really mad people moreso irritated but hey like I said that's just me.

UumiNurseX · Mar 15, 2011

Wow. I second the idea that you need to go talk to someone.
I see children in the pysch facilities and medical facilities and have a lot of empathy for them as well. I think what you are trying to say is a lot of them are getting help, which is a great thing. HOWEVER, it's still really sad that they need help in the first place. A lot of children in this world shouldn't have to see and live through some of the things these children have and yes, it's sad.
As for your other classmates...why would you let them affect you as much as they do? You really HATE them enough that you would quit school? Why? Going to school is for such a short time and then when you leave, you never have to see these people again. Why let them have so much control over your life, emotions, attitude? You can't control them (how they act or their feelings), however, you can control the way you respond. If you brush them off, you will feel a lot less like exploding.
By the way, are you going to let the patients affect you as much as your classmates? I can tell you, there are going to be some really big PITA patients. You are going to have to learn how to deal.

Oh no ma'am, lol. I promise. Clinical days are the days I look forward too, I swear! I love the patients!!!! In MedSurg, most of the patients really just need basic things, like someone to fetch them things or someone just to sit and talk and I am all too happy to do either one. I like being around those that I feel need me or would like me to be there.....you know? Oh yes, I have run into many a mean patient, lol. I worked in a hospital as a CNA for two years and wooooh let me tell you! But for some reason I never held it against those people for being that way because I knew how they felt. They were sick and not feeling the way they wanted to, they were cooped up in a hospital away from their homes and loved ones, they were in an uncomfortable bed and not having the best meals......I know how the patients feel and would never EVER take it personally when they are not the friendliest. When I worked at the mental facility back in 2002, a female patient spit in my face and a male patient pushed me on the couch and almost pounced on me....but I didn't quit and I never had the urge to quit. In the clinical setting I always make sure I am aware of what the patients are having to go through and I never take it personally. I just try to be there and try to make it as comfortable for them as I possibly can. That's all I can do.

Jane Doe 1 · Mar 15, 2011

I can understand why some of these things annoy you. I hate it when one of my classmates clings to me in clinical out of fear. I also can't stand when people are afraid of psych patients. They have a mental illness, get over it.

If someone's following you around, then by definition that makes you a leader and there must be a reason they chose you to shadow. I always try and think of that when I'm 6 hours into a shift and starting to get really irritated.

Really though, you're letting your anger get out of control. We've all experienced what your going through and can sympathize, but you're letting it consume you. Your attitude is probably shining through to your classmates, instructors, and worst of all to your patients. There is always going to be an incredibly annoying and incompetent colleague, you might as well get used to dealing with them now.