I am an experienced ED nurse, I love my job, and despite many other insecurities in my life, I know I am a darn good nurse. I have been at a hospital for two years in an ED that I have loved dearly until the last few weeks. Management has been cutting staff to a bare minimum. There have been times when every room has been full, patients waiting in the lobby and ambulances lined up to bring patients in and staff has been "low censused", leaving those of us left with often a 5:1 ratio with no techs and many of those are ICU patients. I put a couple of applications with hospitals closer to my home in the same hospital system. My team leader came up to me today and said "I hear you are looking for a new job and I am going to help you." I felt as if I had been punched.
She said she would help me find something else. I was at a loss for words, which is rare for me. I fought tears and went on to take care of my patients. At lunch, I walked into the breakroom and burst into tears. I found out that I wasnt the only one that had been given this "talk". I then went to my team leader and asked if I was being asked to leave. I asked if there were any performance issues or patient care issues. I have always have excellent reviews. I was told that there were no issues, but they needed to cut 500 hours so they were trying to relocate as many nurses as possible to avoid firing anyone. I was told I was one of their best performers.
Why do I feel so defeated? Is this normal or am I just overreacting?
They say the hospital isn't making money and the "powers that be" have mandated a staff cut. I cannot understand cutting staff when the lobby is full of patients are there aren't enough nurses to care for them.
Anger isnt the right word for my feelings toward the team leader. I am more hurt and puzzled that a staff member with a stellar reputation, the only staff nurse with an emergency certification and nothing less than excellent reviews is being escorted off to another position while the MD's are complaining that the new nurses have lack of training and experience. I guess I just sad that after all my dedication and hard work, it seems that I am being dismissed without so much as a thought. I have so many areas of my life that I feel insecure in, but I have not once questioned my abilities as a nurse and now I feel like I am being discarded.
Last edit by trauma.not.drama on Jan 23, '14
: Reason: overthinking