"I'm too young for a living will" - page 3
(this is copied as it was becoming a derail on the "Slow Code" thread). Some ppl think a living will = self DNR order. Many ppl seem to think of living wills as something old ppl should do, but... Read More
Dec 8, '12Wrote my living well at 21 but haven't gotten it legalized yet. I need to get started on that, life is too short. Lord knows I don't wanna be trached, peg, and left on a vent.
Dec 8, '12Quote from OnlybyHisgraceRNGOOD ON YOU!!Wrote my living well at 21 but haven't gotten it legalized yet. I need to get started on that, life is too short. Lord knows I don't wanna be trached, peg, and left on a vent.
I'm not sure if the links in reply #13 and reply #15 are accurate, but, if they are, then apparently, in some states, just signing it in front of 2 other people is all that's required. But, so worth checking on to be sure!!
Dec 8, '12This is an excellent topic. I've actually had a living will since I was 22 (I'm 27 now). I was taking a medical ethics course, and I came to a personal realization that it was necessary after reading several case studies.
Dec 8, '12You are never too young to have a MPOA and a living will. Those nurses who think they are too young need to go work Trauma for a while. A real eye opener for sure. My husband and I discussed on more than one occasion about what he wanted done as he got sicker and if he was no longer a transplant candidate. It was to take him home. We had an advance directive in place. It amazes me that in the light of a terminal illness and an advance directive how much the medical establishment will still try to push dialysis, intubation, pressors etc. on families. I was at home when the doctor told my husband he was unlisted. When I got back to the hospital I requested to see the resident. I insisted that she make him DNR/DNI at that point. She said "well we have to discuss it" I told her no discussion was necessary and to write the order. She hemmed and hawed and I finally told her that if I went to get something to eat and I came back and they were coding him, there would be hell to pay. It got written. The nephrology resident came in to discuss dialysis. I asked the resident if it came with a liver and she said no. I sent her packing. Then she had the fellow come in and once again I had to shut him down too. He needed dialysis 3 days prior! So why then? What part of DNR/DNI didn't they get?? It's all about the money honey! We had insurance and this was a University hospital (that's another story) I shudder to think if one of his kids or his mom was his MPOA. Long story short you certainly need a MPOA that will hold their ground as far as what you want done.
I think it is a sign of maturity that younger people think about these issues and plan before having their families thrown into the medical maelstrom.
Dec 8, '12As a 25 year old diagnosed with a brain tumor a year ago last week at the ripe age of 24 I realized there were quite a few things I'd never thought of...like short term disability for instance . Obviously I didn't have a living will at the time of diagnosis either but between the diagnosis and the major 10 hour brain surgery a week later I did put together some advanced directives and get them notarized. Working in an ICU there are just too many scenarios I have seen and never want happen to me to risk it. My dad actually suggested I do it, I was hesitant but then realized it was probably a good idea. Thankfully my surgery went fine but you just never know.
Dec 8, '12I really didn't read most posts, but had to mention...
If anyone really says they're too young; ask them if they wear a seatbelt, use a fourwheeler, or ride a motorbike.
Just saying... 5 years in surgery; all my trauma activations were due to one of those... not saying it doesn't happen, but of those trauma surgery pts, never saw seatbelt marks.
Dec 8, '12While you're doing the papers with a lawyer, finish the process with your final will (not just the 'living will'/adv dir/MPOA). You can change it if cicrcumstances change for you later. And for some, you should consider a life insurance policy to help pay for some left over bills and/or funeral expenses. (Sheesh - I sound like that TV commercial!)
Had all my paperwork done some 15 years ago after my Mom went critical - without her documentation. She did recover and then subsequently had it all taken care of, along with that of my Dad who could not make the DNR decision by himself at the time she was so sick.
There's no Mr. amoLucia or any little amos in my life; both my parents have passed away. I just want it quick and easy for my sisters to proceed re my end-of-life wishes and to have access to all my vast worldly possessions. I don't want any long-lost faux relative to contest anything.
As experienced nurses, I believe we have all seen way too many tragic horror stories. Some of us, personally, have been only an eyelash away from being one of those stories. Life IS too short; OnlybyHisgrace said it very well.
Dec 8, '12Here's a twist: when I filled out my POLST (physician's orders for life-sustaining treatment) form at the age of 50, my doctor told me I was 'too young'!! Especially because I'd chosen to be a DNR. I looked at him and said "Look, we've both been in codes and we both know how all that works. I don't want that for myself. If I've still got a pulse, sure, go for it....but if I'm dead, for God's sake LEAVE me that way." He signed the order.
Dec 10, '12Quote from VivaLasViejasHere's a twist: when I filled out my POLST (physician's orders for life-sustaining treatment) form at the age of 50, my doctor told me I was 'too young'!! Especially because I'd chosen to be a DNR. I looked at him and said "Look, we've both been in codes and we both know how all that works. I don't want that for myself. If I've still got a pulse, sure, go for it....but if I'm dead, for God's sake LEAVE me that way." He signed the order.
Good on you, Viva, for getting YOUR wishes on paper, this will help someone else someday, further on down the road. I kind of almost see doing our own living wills, as an act of kindness, helping out someone ELSE who will be faced with tough choices know what we'd want done.
It's always an option to have the DNR be conditional,
such as "I'm a DNR if i am terminally ill/end stage disease process"
"I'm a DNR if i am certifiably brain dead."
etc. Probably many docs would balk at a wide-open, general DNR on a young person, but, a conditional DNR is something we can stipulate even decades before the criteria IS met, even when we are very young, we can have it written, and our medical POA be told, "I'm a DNR if i am _____" (whatever criteria each individual wants put in there.)
Sep 16, '15I know this is a super old thread, but I'm looking at major surgery in a few days. You can bet your sweet bippy that there will be an advance directive in place and a DNR order on my chart...