Triage complaints- the good, the bad, and the shocking. - page 5

by canoehead 122,370 Views | 333 Comments

"I was raped by an octopus." "I have severe, severe, severe, SEVERE, SEVERE cold sores!" (five severes, I counted. And one cold sore visible.) Discuss.... Read More


  1. 6
    (I worked in L&D, we have our own triage.)

    Pregnant woman in by ambulance at 3am. Her arrival was followed very shortly by the arrival of FIVE relatives who drove a private vehicle to follow the ambulance. Pt.'s ambulance ride started over 60 miles away (we are the only hospital with L&D for a huge area). I walked in and said, "So what brings you in tonight?"

    "I have a yeast infection."

    Did you call your doctor during office hours? Nope. Did you try OTC Monistat? "No, I would have to pay for that." Why the ambulance? "Well, my family was nervous."

    I did a wet prep, woke up a very angry doctor, and discharged her home with instructions to get OTC monistat, the doctor refused to write a rx after he heard the story. Yes, of course, Medicaid.
    all4neuro, melissa8321, noyesno, and 3 others like this.
  2. 10
    "I have a temp of 100 for an hour"
    "Have you taken any tylenol or motrin?"
    "No thats why I came here"

    WHAT!!!!!!!! You are raking in a $1000 bill that you wont pay because you cant afford the $3 it takes to buy OTC tylenol yet you smoke 2 packs a day that = roughly $10.

    Nursing destroys my compassion and understanding sometimes.
    1Dreamer, ImKosher, JHU2016, and 7 others like this.
  3. 5
    One of my all time favorites was a man brought in around 8 AM with a head lac. He was intoxicated and got in a fight with another guy while attending a "Legs and Eggs" show. Legs and Eggs is a "breakfast" show at a nearby strip club. Who knew?
    SherriJones, cblue152, k-hole, and 2 others like this.
  4. 12
    Here's mine: Pt comes in with towel to face. While talking, blood pours out of his mouth. His wife found out he was cheating on her and BIT OFF HIS TONGUE during a french kiss! Made the news.
    Heather2014, all4neuro, SherriJones, and 9 others like this.
  5. 4
    My invisible Mohawk hurts. Really, no- really.
  6. 0
    Quote from redhead_NURSE98!
    That link was hysterical!

    I have had 2 pts fake seizures in the past 6 months and they were equally hysterical and DETECTABLE!

    Keep 'em coming!

    So funny!
  7. 4
    Tonight:


    I have sunburnt feet...seriously.......... healthy person with red legs at 11pm at night in summer


    I hurt my foot.......pt has not had a shower in possibly months, drunk and feet so skanky I cold not see anything except dirt and hard skin

    Numb lip

    Abdo pain X 4 years

    The broken little toe after stubbing it who calls an ambulance and brings her kid with her late at night leaving a houseful of people and cars in the driveway.


    And the 2 pts in a 100kmh high speed rollover who walked away!!!!!
    Last edit by Hagabel on Jan 8, '13
  8. 3
    Ok back to the topic at hand - triage complaints. If you wish to discuss medicaid and/or insurance issues, please start another thread - thanks everyone.
  9. 10
    I've got one. Pt CC, "I need crackers. If you don't give me crackers now I'll turn into a transvestite!" I can't make this stuff up.
    blaundee, NO50FRANNY, loveu123, and 7 others like this.
  10. 3
    "I've had abdominal pain and vomiting for months. I see my doctor tomorrow, but I can't wait that long. I had to come to the ER now 60 days in a row." (my emphasis...but she did say 'had')

    Well, she was not lying about the 60 days in a row part. P.S she had to come each of those days by ambulance--sometimes multiple times each day to multiple ERs. Each by EMS.


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