The Dark Side of Passion

Anna Flaxis, BSN, RN · Sep 25, 2014

I totally get it. PM me if you want. I'm safe. Take care of yourself, okay?

Susie2310 · Sep 25, 2014

I do not know you, so if I have misunderstood things you have said in previous posts, please take this in stride, but from reading your posts you come across as you mentioned here, striving to provide excellent patient care and striving to be a very helpful colleague and team member. You also come across, from your own words, as being well regarded by your colleagues, supervisors, and physicians, and generally appreciated by your patients. One thing that I do recall is that you have mentioned working multiple long shifts in a row, and I get the impression that you do this frequently. I have actually winced at the number of shifts/hours you have mentioned working without days off in between. Perhaps it would be worth considering working a schedule that is really livable, in a highly stressful and demanding job, that would allow you more time to rest and recharge in between your scheduled shifts. You sound as though you give a lot to your patients and to your colleagues; you sound as though you have an excellent attitude. I think it would be a tremendous shame to burn out, and as you said, become an automaton in your job and cease to care. You, your patients, and your colleagues deserve more than that. As I said at the beginning of my post, I do not know you, or your life situation, so I am going entirely on what I recall you have shared in your posts on this forum. I know that what I have said may not be relevant for you; only you can determine that. I do wish you the best, and hope you will find a way to resolve what you are currently experiencing.

eLeVatioN · Sep 25, 2014

You are not too old for martial arts. My father took up aikido in his late 40s and took it beyond the first degree of black belt. Yoga is a great idea too. Do what you need to do to avoid burnout. Good health to you!

PMFB-RN, RN · Sep 25, 2014

Fly fishing man. The key to good mental health.

mikethemurse, BSN, RN · Sep 25, 2014

I know what your saying, I don't work in the ED, but I do work in a high stress, high responsiblity job, in corrections, and have felt exactly the same way, and have as we say in jail, gotten out of character from time to time. Keep your head up, we are all human (as super human as we are expected to be), and it ok to feel this way. The important thing is to remember why we got into this field in the first place, and also remember to take as good care of ourselves as we do our patients.

NutmeggeRN, BSN · Sep 25, 2014

Be kind to yourself. Get a massage. Take a walk. Breathe.

OldDude · Sep 25, 2014

I completely understand and relate to what you're saying and there are "events" I wish I could rewind and play over differently. We are held to a standard of unattainable perfection while the people we deal with can say, do, or act in any manor of antisocial behavior and we're told to understand and sympathize with them. There was only one perfect person that walked this Earth but if Jesus had worked as a nurse in an ED there would most like be another chapter in the bible addressing this very subject. Cut yourself some slack, put it behind you, and don't try to change who you are.

middleagednurse · Sep 25, 2014

I hear you, but keep in mind that on your deathbed are you going to say "I wish I had worked more?" Work Life balance is important. I understand what you're saying, but really, other people don't care what a hard worker you are. You are easily replaceable. Sad to say but working hard is not as valued as you would think. I started out as a young naïve nurse, boy have I learned a few things. After you've worked a few jobs you learn that you're easily replaceable. Your co workers are not your friends. Some people will never be happy no matter what you do for them. So follow policies and give adequate care. Don't bust a gut.

middleagednurse · Sep 25, 2014

Point your passion in another direction. Yourself, your SO, your family, your hobbies and interests.

Raven Sierra, BSN, RN · Sep 25, 2014

This field is very demanding - physically, emotionally, spiritually. The ED can chew you up, spit you out, and move on to the next person.

Please - talk to someone you can trust, without violating HIPAA, of course, like a friend, a significant other, a spiritual adviser...and then find something that you love that has nothing to do with work. Even if it's as simple as a good book and a hot bubble bath, or a round of lifting weights at the gym. For me, I live in the country and have a small farm. It is my sanctuary, and my passion is here. Find whatever makes you relax, and then make it a priority.

mc3, ASN, RN · Sep 25, 2014

We're only human. We are also the hardest on ourselves. (((((hugs))))

mc3:nurse: