Why don't I care?

FutureRN_NP · Jan 25, 2012

If I were you, if you could afford too, cut working hours. That might helps. The anxiety and exhaustion might be related to how much you work.

Merlyn · Jan 25, 2012

It could be anything from being exhausted from your job to a Vitamin deficiency to depression Time either to see the doc again or cut back on work. My choice, see the Doctor again.

Creamsoda, ASN, RN · Jan 25, 2012

Although I dont have anxiety issues, I do feel how your are feeling. Im chalking it up to SAD. Seriously its the same darn thing every year. Lethargic, exhausted feeling. I could sleep in till 12-1 pm every day I am off. No problem. Like you I love hiking, skiing ect, but I just feel exhausted. I know I gained a few lbs. Its way too easy to come home have some wine and a good meal after a stressfull shift and go to bed and sleep all day. So I just radically changed my eating, went on a diet, got rid of carbs and am forcing myself to go to the gym. So far so good but its taking effort. Its just so easy to fall in a pattern of bad habits and continue the cycle. Just try rdically breaking that cycle and force yourself to get out and do things. Its gets easier. I know a big part of it is the cold and lack of light. I know I always feel better after I spend some time outside, its just a matter of forcing myself to get out there then I feel so much better. I stocked up on vitamins, vitamin D, ect. Cut out the alcohol and am just trying to eat a completely clean diet for a while. Also having a focus outside of work. Do you have hobbies/projects? I find working on a project and accomplishing it keeps me busier too so maybe your anxiety wouldnt be so bad. I also dont feel "depressed" at all, just exhausted.

Kashia, ASN, LVN · Jan 25, 2012

If I did not know I didn't, I would think I wrote this post.

No it is not about the patients, ever. They are the reason I continue....

So I work noc's and all I want to do is sleep and I also do not feel it is depression

because I am totally happy sleeping:-) But I am doing less of other things.

As for medications to help, I have read threads on here and came away realizing

a very good number of nurses are taking something, benzo's,

You are not alone on that one.

I do not know the solution....but I seek one. I pray on it. I think it has to do with being

in a profit driven system; myself, out of necessity, there for my profit...as meager as it

is!

So thinking about.... possibility of doing some volunteer nursing. At a summer camp?

Finding a non profit organization to work with. Maybe another stay at Optimum Health

Institute first....

joanna73, BSN, RN · Jan 25, 2012

Maybe you need to have a mini vacation or switch shifts. Every winter all my life I've felt tired....I know I have SAD. I take extra D3 and force myself to exercise, which helps. I also try to take a vacation every year in order to break up the winter. I hope you find some relief soon :)

Scarlette Wings · Jan 26, 2012

It does sound like depression or burn out to me. Depression is not always sadness. Do have a physical and make sure it isn't anemia or an endocrine/hormone thing though because medical issues hit nurses as well as patients too.

SuesquatchRN, BSN, RN · Jan 26, 2012

Force yourself to go outdoors on your days off. Even for half an hour, no matter how cold. Get out in the air and the sun. And as has already been said, see your PCP.

Guttercat, ASN, RN · Jan 26, 2012

No, I'm not referring to patients. It's about when I get home. On my days off, I could sleep all day and every day I have off. I have NO energy. I used to like working out, hiking, riding my bike, etc., but lately, I wake up tired. I feel like the poster child for those depression commercials as I never want to get out of bed, but I don't FEEL depressed. I hate to admit, but I take anti-anxiety meds in order to deal with anxiety at work, but I have tried to lessen my dosage and my anxiety gets worse. Why don't I care about anything lately? Anybody else have similar issues?
:/

A hospitalist MD told me not long ago, "I'm not naming names but you'd be shocked to know how many of our Hospitalists are on medications for depression and anxiety."

Sometimes the burden of caring for others when we have nothing left in the tank to care for even ourselves, results in just what you've described in your post.

For those of us providing and delivering care, there's a delicate balance (as tenuous as it is) between a full tank of Give O' sh&t... and fumes.

Many of my colleagues have stated they have just enough energy left to close the blinds and turn off the phone at the end of the workday. I also think that, the more one actually cares...the more prone they are to an empty tank.

Sometimes I wonder if we caregivers, from the docs on down, don't live in a state of perpetual PTSD.

I do think it helps if you have a supportive network of friends and family.

AngelofLTC · Jan 26, 2012

I think I wrote that post too! I feel exactly the same. I think I'm depressed but just trudging through....my husband is very supportive and doesnt push me too much. I keep thinking it will get better sooner or later. I seem to get all the things in life done that have to be done...other than that, not much else.

Merlyn · Jan 26, 2012

It's the nature we call caring for the sick. I'm sideline from Nursing due to illness. But in all my years of nursing their has only been one place that address the issue staff mental health. That place had a psychologist on call 24/7 just for the staff. but that was back in the '80s. Now no one has the time. The NJ government recently did a study on why we have so many Doctors and Nurses on drugs. I don't know what the results were but it gave some politicians reason to put 2 or 3 more relatives on the state payroll. WE are dying and the state is condemning us when we have dirty urine. It is the stress.

nursechris1 · Jan 26, 2012

I too have weekends where I just sleep the weekend away. No motivation to do anything. Right now, I force myself to go to the gym right after work (I work 8 hour shifts). I don't go home first, I keep my bag in the car and go directly to the gym.

I work with 2 other nurses, all 3 of us are on antidepressants. Our pharmacist started on antidepressants before she quit. Most nurses I have known were taking antidepressants.

You should rule out physical causes first, but like others have said, you don't necessarily have to feel sad, the other symptoms you have are signs of depression