I had a middle aged patient (neurologically intact), who rang the bell and said "Can I have my nurse in here?". I replied "What is it that you need?" (Because sometimes you walk in there and find it's something you could have brought for them!). He said "I really need to see her." So once I walk in, I find out that he had a bowel movement and needed to be "cleaned." This is a man capable of asking for the bedpan or getting up to the bathroom!
It truly bothered me that he had a bowel movement on himself. Long story short, I told him rather frankly that he needs to ask for the bedpan in the future. Next day, I hear from other nurses that he was really upset with me and said I was nasty and cruel towards him.
If your capable, do it yourself.
I worked yesterday and found out the behaviour continued, I guess some nurses didn't give the "ask for the bedpan or bathroom" speech. He even asked one nurse to move his left leg closer to his right leg in the bed (Are you kidding me???). He was admitted with heart failure and recovering well....
Specializes in Critical Care, ED, Cath lab, CTPAC,Trauma.
Hello everyone!
I had a middle aged patient (neurologically intact), who rang the bell and said "Can I have my nurse in here?". I replied "What is it that you need?" (Because sometimes you walk in there and find it's something you could have brought for them!). He said "I really need to see her." So once I walk in, I find out that he had a bowel movement and needed to be "cleaned." This is a man capable of asking for the bedpan or getting up to the bathroom!
It truly bothered me that he had a bowel movement on himself. Long story short, I told him rather frankly that he needs to ask for the bedpan in the future. Next day, I hear from other nurses that he was really upset with me and said I was nasty and cruel towards him.
If your capable, do it yourself.
I worked yesterday and found out the behaviour continued, I guess some nurses didn't give the "ask for the bedpan or bathroom" speech. He even asked one nurse to move his left leg closer to his right leg in the bed (Are you kidding me???). He was admitted with heart failure and recovering well....
Sorry but no, do it yourself.
I would find (pay) the biggest male CNA,Orderly,EMT,Medic......to just once go to the room to help him "clean up" and introduce him as the "new personal attendant" for him since he has found it difficult to perform his own personal care..... and would be his "beck and call" attendant until he felt he had improved enough to care for himself.......
Specializes in Critical Care, ED, Cath lab, CTPAC,Trauma.
Who are these people who actually WANT the health staff to clean up their pee or poop?!?!? When that happened to me during labor and delivery (it doesn't just happen during the pushing stage) I was MORTIFIED! Everyone I have ever known who has had this to happen was MORTIFIED!
Ah...... the general public!!!!!!! Need I say more.
Thanks for sharing the stories. I had quite a good laugh!
I'll use some of the lines "Who does it at home for you?". Gives me a different way of approaching a situation if it happens again. I can't believe some people come into the hospital and expect unrealistic things, especially when fully able to accomplish it themselves.
I once had a lady who absolutely wanted no wrinkles on her sheets or her gown beneath her at any point during her sleep. A little ridiculous but she was palliative so I went a little easier on her.
I had a middle aged patient (neurologically intact), who rang the bell and said "Can I have my nurse in here?". I replied "What is it that you need?" (Because sometimes you walk in there and find it's something you could have brought for them!). He said "I really need to see her." So once I walk in, I find out that he had a bowel movement and needed to be "cleaned." This is a man capable of asking for the bedpan or getting up to the bathroom!
It truly bothered me that he had a bowel movement on himself. Long story short, I told him rather frankly that he needs to ask for the bedpan in the future. Next day, I hear from other nurses that he was really upset with me and said I was nasty and cruel towards him.
If your capable, do it yourself.
I worked yesterday and found out the behaviour continued, I guess some nurses didn't give the "ask for the bedpan or bathroom" speech. He even asked one nurse to move his left leg closer to his right leg in the bed (Are you kidding me???). He was admitted with heart failure and recovering well....
Sorry but no, do it yourself.
Wow. that is so lazy. If you need help that is one thing; when you are completely capable but just lazy....I hate that.
"Short arm syndrome" is frequently encountered at the rehab facility where I work. It is amazing how having a TKA can drastically reduce the length of ones arms to a point where they become useless. :) When a pt asks me to wipe them I insist they at least attempt to do it for themselves. Once they have attempted I have no problem assisting them if needed.
Unfortuately the focus where I work has shifted from encouraging pt's to become independant in their own self care to good customer service. We are now expected to bend over backwards to ensure pt satifaction rates are high. It seems as if our average length of stay is getting longer due to nurses being afraid to ask the pt to do for themself.
I remember when I was 13 and had my appendix out I was so mortified when the nurses insisted I use the bedpan. Like hell I was going to!!!! :eek: So the nurses showed me how to unplug my IV and take myself to the bathroom and make sure I plug it back in. Looking back, they probably loved me even though I was so insistent on being independent. Or loved me because of it lol.
Specializes in Medsurg/ICU, Mental Health, Home Health.
Get this - about 2 1/2 years ago, we had an MS pt admitted. I can't remember why (I'm thinking UTI or pna).
Anyway, while he was on our floor, we turned him, bathed him, wiped him, etc.
Well...turns out he did have MS - but very early MS...he was still completely ambulatory! We discovered this when it was time for him to be D/C'd (to home with his family who "cared for him") and he walked out of bed independently and sat in the wheelchair!
The more I know about people, the less I understand!
Specializes in Assisted Living nursing, LTC/SNF nursing.
"Short arm syndrome" is frequently encountered at the rehab facility where I work. It is amazing how having a TKA can drastically reduce the length of ones arms to a point where they become useless. :) When a pt asks me to wipe them I insist they at least attempt to do it for themselves. Once they have attempted I have no problem assisting them if needed.
Unfortuately the focus where I work has shifted from encouraging pt's to become independant in their own self care to good customer service. We are now expected to bend over backwards to ensure pt satifaction rates are high. It seems as if our average length of stay is getting longer due to nurses being afraid to ask the pt to do for themself.
Yes, this is what I have experienced and do not work for that company anymore. I decided I didn't want to be fired for asking that someone try to be more independent or tried reasoning with them and then have my words skewed which my manager didn't care if it was true or not, that's how the customer felt and I was wrong. I guess we are a dime a dozen type of nurses and 'they are beating down the doors for your job', although after giving my notice and an extra couple weeks, sounds like no one has been 'beating down the doors' for my job or several other positions that are open for the same reason.
I remember when I was 13 and had my appendix out I was so mortified when the nurses insisted I use the bedpan. Like hell I was going to!!!! :eek: So the nurses showed me how to unplug my IV and take myself to the bathroom and make sure I plug it back in. Looking back, they probably loved me even though I was so insistent on being independent. Or loved me because of it lol.
Ya..me too. 30 years old admitted with DVT and strict bedrest. Nurse tried to tell me I could not get up and go to the bathroom - um, OK, just go chart you educated me on the risks while I get up and go pee. First one back to the bed wins! LOL
Yeah, I had a patient a day or two post c/section whose mother told me that she (the patient) would need help wiping her bum after a bowel movement. (She had IBS or something that caused her stools to be loose, can't remember exactly what.) The patient's husband was in there with her; they were newlywed and the mother told me the patient was embarrassed to ask her husband to help her with that. I thought to myself....you can make a baby with this man, and he was present for the delivery of said baby, ergo he has seen everything you have. And you can't ask him for help cleaning your tail? Really?
I will be the first one to help you while you're still fresh post-op. But a couple days out, and you're out walking in the halls? Naw.
Yeah, I had a patient a day or two post c/section whose mother told me that she (the patient) would need help wiping her bum after a bowel movement. (She had IBS or something that caused her stools to be loose, can't remember exactly what.) The patient's husband was in there with her; they were newlywed and the mother told me the patient was embarrassed to ask her husband to help her with that. I thought to myself....you can make a baby with this man, and he was present for the delivery of said baby, ergo he has seen everything you have. And you can't ask him for help cleaning your tail? Really?
yeah, really.
i wouldn't want my husband cleaning up my fecal accident...no way.
sex and nudity are altogether different and cannot compare to cleaning up loose stools.
if my husband or i were critically ill with self deficits, then yes...we are there for each other.
but to clean up my mess in a much less critical situation...never...different dynamics altogether.
but that's me...and obviously one other person as well.:)
i wouldn't want my husband cleaning up my fecal accident...no way.
sex and nudity are altogether different and cannot compare to cleaning up loose stools.
if my husband or i were critically ill with self deficits, then yes...we are there for each other.
but to clean up my mess in a much less critical situation...never...different dynamics altogether.
but that's me...and obviously one other person as well.:)
leslie
Very well put. I'll go one step further...in a situation where my husband was critically ill.
After a traumatic injury, my DH was on morphine and totally out of it, inpatient. I was sleeping in his room, and I woke up to his moaning. He was drowsy from sleep, plus drugged up on pain meds. He needed to urinate, but he was having trouble locating and placing his urinal. He asked me for help. I did, but as I was holding the urinal and watching my husband in his drugged and sleepy haze, I began crying. My rock, my life partner, the one I hold hands with through this roller coaster of a life...was helpless. In that moment, the entire burden of our life at the time was on my shoulders and mine alone.
He recovered enough to be discharged. I was at the hospital with other family members who were injured in the same event, and I had left my husband with his daughter who was then a teenager. When I came home, I found him distraught because he had to ask his daughter to put on his socks. It made him feel helpless, and his way of coping was talking to me. He eventually wrote a beautiful poem about his experience with the socks.
Sometimes spouses and children aren't the best people to provide care to acutely- or traumatically-ill relatives. It affects the family and the patient in ways that can't really be accurately described due to the sudden onset of the condition.
Chronic illness, however, may be different, as there is a different mindset that goes with a chronic diagnosis.
:eek: So the nurses showed me how to unplug my IV and take myself to the bathroom and make sure I plug it back in. Looking back, they probably loved me even though I was so insistent on being independent. Or loved me because of it lol..thumb.gif.a0171653eaae518ecf728198d692fc48.gif){kind=avatar}
Esme12, ASN, BSN, RN
20,908 Posts
I would find (pay) the biggest male CNA,Orderly,EMT,Medic......to just once go to the room to help him "clean up" and introduce him as the "new personal attendant" for him since he has found it difficult to perform his own personal care.....
and would be his "beck and call" attendant until he felt he had improved enough to care for himself.......