When Faith Creates False Hope

[kabfighter]

In light of the Jahi McMath incident, I am left wondering how often my nursing colleagues have encountered the family of terminally-ill (or brain dead, etc.) patients in a state of complete denial that is bolstered by their faith. If you visit the Facebook page named "Keep Jahi Mcmath on life support", you will find dozens of people claiming that God will perform a miracle and allow Jahi to 'wake up', despite the fact that no less than five physicians have declared her brain dead, and the coroner issued a certificate of death on December 12th. These people have seemingly entered a state of delusion, and are completely unable to accept the reality of the situation.

If we have a terminally-ill patient, and a family member says, "I believe that God will heal her," do we have a professional obligation to reiterate the prognosis and dismiss their religious beliefs, or just nod our heads? Creating false hope is unethical, but it is also not our place to argue with peoples' religious beliefs.

How have you dealt with these situations, or how would you if put in a similar circumstance?

[BrandonLPN, LPN]

"Yes, God does hear all prayers, but sometimes the answer is no." Father Francis Mulcahey on M*A*S*H

Fake article from The Onion humor-newspaper:

God Answers Prayers Of Paralyzed Little Boy

'No,' Says God

News * God * ISSUE 34*19 * Dec 9, 1998

SAN FRANCISCO-For as long as he can remember, 7-year-old Timmy Yu has had one precious dream: From the bottom of his heart, he has hoped against hope that God would someday hear his prayer to walk again. Though many thought Timmy's heavenly plea would never be answered, his dream finally came true Monday, when the Lord personally responded to the wheelchair-bound boy's prayer with a resounding no.

Wheelchair-bound Timmy Yu, who finally received his long-awaited reply from God.

"I knew that if I just prayed hard enough, God would hear me," said the joyful Timmy, surrounded by stuffed animals sent by well-wishing Christians from around the globe, as he sat in the wheelchair to which he will be confined for the rest of his life. "And now my prayer has been answered. I haven't been this happy since before the accident, when I could walk and play with the other children like a normal boy."

God's response came at approximately 10 a.m. Monday, following a particularly fervent Sunday prayer session by little Timmy. Witnesses said God issued His miraculous answer in the form of a towering column of clouds, from which poured forth great beams of Divine light and the music of the Heavenly Hosts. The miraculous event took place in the Children's Special Care Ward of St. Luke's Hospital, where Timmy goes three times a week for an excruciating two-hour procedure to drain excess fluid from his damaged spinal column.

Said Angela Schlosser, a day nurse who witnessed the Divine Manifestation: "An incredible, booming voice said to Timmy, 'I am the Lord thy God, who created the rivers and the mountains, the heavens and the earth, the sun and the moon and the stars. Before Me sits My beloved child, whose faith is that of the mustard seed from which grows mighty and powerful things. My child, Timmy Yu, I say unto you thus: I have heard your prayers, and now I shall answer them. No, you cannot get out of your wheelchair. Not ever."

Paralyzed in a 1996 auto accident that also claimed the lives of both his parents, Timmy has served as a shining example to his fellow churchgoers at Lord In Heaven On High Church, inspiring others with his simple, heartfelt devotion. Now that Timmy has received an answer, Christians the world over are celebrating his story as a stirring testament to the power of faith.

"The Lord has answered a little boy's plea to know if he would ever walk again, and that answer was no," Rev. H. Newman Gunther of the San Francisco School Of Divinity said. "For years, this boy had been plagued by the question of whether or not he would ever walk, and now Our Lord, in his wisdom and mercy, has forever laid to rest any lingering doubt. Young Timmy can rest assured in the immutable truth that the Lord has bestowed upon him. Now and for all time, he finally knows that he will never escape the cruel prison of his chair of iron, for God hath willed it so. Praise be to God!"

God.

Asked for comment, God said: "This kind-hearted child's simple prayer hath moved Me. Never before have I seen such faith. His trusting soul, so full of innocent devotion to Me, hath offered seventy times seven prayers asking, 'God? Can I please walk again?' It was indeed right and fitting that I, in My infinite wisdom, should share with him the One True Answer to this long-repeated question he put before Me."

"My will be done," God added.

Witnesses to the miracle said Timmy begged God for several minutes to change His mind and heal his shattered vertebrae, but the Lord stood firm.

"God strongly suggested that Timmy consider praying to one of the other intercessionary agents of Divine power, like Jesus, Mary or maybe even a top saint," Timmy's personal physician, Dr. William Luttrell, said. "The Lord stressed to Timmy that it was a long shot, but He said he might have better luck with one of them."

Despite all the attention he has received, Timmy remains humble in the face of his newfound notoriety as the only human ever to have a prayer directly answered by God Himself.

"I know that God loves me, because it says so in the Bible," Timmy said. "So right now, I am just glad that God took the time to answer my prayer. If only I could walk, this would be the greatest day of my life."

[kakamegamama]

Such a sad difficult situation. I do believe in miracles. I have actually seen a few. I've also prayed for them, only to be told "not this time". That being said.....our God, while He does still perform miracles, is not a sugar daddy to always give us what we want when we want it. And, sadly, sometimes, that is how He is seen. I feel for this mother. I cannot begin to imagine the pain she is feeling. I think, too, that He gives man knowledge to recognize when our bodies are done on this earth, and to leave things in His hands. We just seem to have messed that up somewhere along the way.

[LadyFree28, BSN, LPN, RN]

Such a sad difficult situation. I do believe in miracles. I have actually seen a few. I've also prayed for them only to be told "not this time". That being said.....our God, while He does still perform miracles, is not a sugar daddy to always give us what we want when we want it. And, sadly, sometimes, that is how He is seen. I feel for this mother. I cannot begin to imagine the pain she is feeling. I think, too, that He gives man knowledge to recognize when our bodies are done on this earth, and to leave things in His hands. We just seem to have messed that up somewhere along the way.[/quote']

Sugar daddy; LOVE the reference!

Well said.

[bloodorange]

I am currently reading Jennifer Worth's memoir/essay collection "In the Midst of Life," which is about death. (She was a nurse who also wrote "Call the Midwife" and its two sequels, which have been adapted into the BBC series!) It's very moving and I like her spiritual standpoint. Highly recommend it to those who haven't read it and are compelled by this thread!

[kakamegamama]

I love the quote by the chaplain, Morte. On target.....

[JBudd, MSN]

I have seen miracles, sometimes brought about by the medicines we have available (and Who gave us the herbs, etc. to make them with?), and sometimes despite or without them.

How do you answer? Mine is "I don't know what God's plan is for your family member, only that He can bring out good from any situation. He doesn't always heal, but He will always comfort and be with you." It all comes down to trust, do you trust God enough to know He will do the best thing, whether it be death or healing?

Pain and illness are not in God's perfect plan, but we live in a fallen world... Jesus was asked why a man was born blind, and the answer was so that God's grace might be shown in the situation. Tough concept, but I trust God to know the big picture.

I had to sign the DNR for my 42 yo pastor husband. He died in my arms. He is no longer in pain, is not suffering, and I will see him again one day.

[kakamegamama]

Oh JBudd---so sorry for your loss. I am glad that you were with your husband when he went Home. I had that privilege as well, when my husband died 12 years ago of a sudden, massive coronary. I am thankful that I know where he is and will one day join him. One day at a time, sometimes, one step at a time is how we walk, isn't it? Blessings.

[NurseQT]

I was reminded of a sad case here in Wisconsin in 2008. An 11 yr old girl died from diabetic ketoacidosis because her parents refused to seek medical attention and chose to pray for her to recover instead. This poor girl was ill for weeks and finally slipped into a coma shortly before she died. They allowed for her to suffer unnessessiraly for something that could have easily been treated. Both of her parents were convicted of 2nd degree homicide.

Not exactly like the Jahi Mcmath case but another extreme example of religion being chose over medicine.

[PatiencePlease]

I think this young girls' situation was a horrible incident, I don't know if it was an accident, because who really knows what happened besides her doctors and her family. There is inherent risk in any procedure. The press is just begging for scraps of information. This is going to be a long drawn out legal battle, much like most life support cases.

Im this case, I don't think faith is causing false hope, honestly, I think faith is a cover for denial. I also think personally faith and spirituality are two totally different arenas as well. Everyday as a nurse and people in general pray for miracles, finding a organ for transplant, winning the lottery, positive or negative test results, getting that job.... why some are answered and some are not, is anyone's guess. You can rationalize this anyway which helps you cope. Personally, I wish the little girl could live or die in peace, whatever the plan is for her.

[BadwomanM]

With families having a difficult time with acceptance, I generally just affirm their belief/wishes while still being gently honest about the what is happening based on the information at hand. I have told them that based on the medical knowledge we have, XYZ is happening now and that people generally don't come back from that, etc.

I have sometimes told families that the perfect, ultimate healing is that we get to be with God. Sometimes it helps them accept what's happening.

[BadwomanM]

Just read a headline that Jahi has now passed. May her family find peace and comfort at last.

Jahi McMath, California teen at center of brain-death controvers - KFVS12 News & Weather Cape Girardeau, Carbondale, Poplar Bluff

[Tenebrae, BSN, RN]

As a nurse and someone who is fairly areligious, I respect a persons right to their faith, because at the end of the day its not about me, its about ensuring the best outcomes for that patient.

I work in palliative and aged care. I have yet to see someone who is in end stage disease miraculously not die. Working in aged care I have no seen someone start regressing in age either. I'm honest with my patients and their families when they ask me about the prognosis for their loved one, although I will always qualify it with "while it appears X is going to happen, we dont know what will happen until it happens" or words to that effect

Dont have an issue with organising for the vicar/reverend to come either.