What was the MOST ridiculous thing a patient came to the ER for?

And did you have to treat them?

I am just curious. Your stories always seem to either crack me up or shake my head in amazement.

Thanks for sharing ?

Specializes in home & public health, med-surg, hospice.

okay, i'm gonna tell y'all a story that indirectly happended to me...:imbar

when i was in lvn school (about 12 years ago) i worked as an er clerk, so everybody there knew me, right?

anyway, one night while i'm relieving the switchboard my b/f (later husband) comes into the er w/ "pain in his groin." it's dx. as kidney stone.

but what does he ask the doctor???? "do you think i may have pulled a muscle from having too much sex?" omg!!!!! :uhoh3:

i got picked on so much for that! everybody knew about it too, of course. and you know, even though he did have a kidney stone and all, i still kind of think that was his intention in his question...to let everyone know what was what.

:uhoh3: :imbar :rotfl:

Specializes in ICU, ER, HH, NICU, now FNP.

BWAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!! :lol2:

Tell em all yeah it was probably from that - thank god you gave up the bottle of olive oil, the car battery and the duct tape before he really got hurt!

Specializes in ER/SICU/Med-Surg/Ortho/Trauma/Flight.

hey I sunburn and mine are very bad so bad they blister and turn into 2nd degree burns and it doesnt matter how much sun block I put on I still burn baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaad! I have had to go to er but by private vehicle and usually get a tetnus, IV antibiotics, benadryl and decadron for the itching shots mind you. and generally have to be wrapped in silvadene and have pain meds.

Specializes in ER, PACU, CORRECTIONAL HEALTH, FLIGHT.

three patients come immediately to mind......

1) chapped lips x 3 days

2) self-circumcision

3) cant find "hood ring" (referring to female genitalia ornament)

oh and also........

sunburn from tanning bed (called 911 and came via EMS)

Hmmm, I'm surprised no one has mentioned these yet:

Stubbed toe

burning eyes from chopping onions

paper cut

hoorifice voice from too much yelling

canker sore (mouth ulcer)

cellulite

cut while shaving

thumb sucking

toilet training

splinter

Blackheads

A pierced earlobe ripped through when caught by a hairbrush (15 years earlier!)

Tattoo removal (on Christmas Day, of course)

"I think I have dandruff, I need an antibiotic."

The guy w/ a fireplace poker up his rear. Said he was laying carpet and backed into it. (yeah, right!)

The guy who brought BOTH of his girlfriends in in labor, at the same time (live dangerously, die young!). That was the first they knew of each other.

The guy who needed his acne cleared up 'today' because he was going to be a rock star 'tomorrow'. (This one was really sad; he was delusional, but you can't admit somebody for thinking they are going to be a rock star - by the end of that week, he had shot 2 people, one of whom he had taken hostage and then killed himself)

Savvy

A woman stated she sat on a prescription bottle and it happened to become lodged in her rectum!

Specializes in Pediatric Pulmonology and Allergy.

She could always say that she accidentally swallowed it and it got stuck on the way out.

We had one at 5:30 in the morning who came in because their "cock ring" got lost in the lady parts. She wanted the doc to get it out.

Specializes in home & public health, med-surg, hospice.
BWAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!! :lol2:

Tell em all yeah it was probably from that - thank god you gave up the bottle of olive oil, the car battery and the duct tape before he really got hurt!

I know, right?!! Funny how your perspective changes...lol, @ 21-22 y/o I was so embarrassed. Now, @ 35, I'd be so proud...:lol2:

We have patients who call EMS to bring them to the ER for a bogus complaint..then get inside the ER proper...refuse to be seen.... and then walk to the supermarket next door...they just needed a ride

And then want a ride back home. "Aw, come on, man! Waddya mean I can't get no ride home? You brought me here! I don't got no cab money. I know my rights!"

Savvy

Oh, and then there was the patient wanted to know it he had 'roaches of the liver' (cirrhosis) because if he did, it was too late to stop drinking, and if he didn't, why stop?

Savvy

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