What was the MOST ridiculous thing a patient came to the ER for?

And did you have to treat them?

I am just curious. Your stories always seem to either crack me up or shake my head in amazement.

Thanks for sharing ?

A young couple brought their 4 month old in because he was crying for 3 hours earlier in the day, no fever, no vomiting, no rash, no nothing. Very cute baby though!

Specializes in Inpatient Acute Rehab.

We had a lady come in to be seen for...... get this..... chapped lips!!!!

Go to the store and buy some chap stick lady!!!!!!!! :angryfire

Specializes in ER straight out of nursing school.

How about the 30yo female came in for a splinter in her finger (she was at work when she did it) Any ideas what she had on her mind? On Job Injury.....

And then the crack head that came via ambulance because she thought she "might have a STD" when I asked her if she had recently had unprotected sex, she told me "well, I milked his d**k before I let him put in my pu**y and nothing came out of it", I then asked her why she thought she might have an STD and she said "it kinda smells down there" THAT IT DID!!! I must admit that is the funkiest monkey I have ever seen! Not to mention her foul mouth!

Specializes in ER straight out of nursing school.

oh! I forgot the best part, when I went back in to discharge her, she had put her sweatshirt on..... I swear to goodness it said "DIRTY SOUTH" on it!!! I thought I was going to die trying not to laugh. Needless to say the doc got a big laugh out of that one along with everyone else working that day. :chuckle

Specializes in ER, ICU, L&D, OR.

I liked the 22 yo m who came in after Overdosing on cocaine and also took 20 tabs of Viagra

Hes was stiff as a board :biggringi :biggringi

Brilliant! I wonder if the government would be willing to make up some "how to masturbate" pamphlets to avoid spending $$ on extra ER visits. I betcha it would qualify as a disablility if enough people complained...

Perhaps community health nurses could hold some teaching classes. But they would have to be trained by their administrators-oh the mind boggles..

OhOHYEAH- I finally found my specialty- Where can I get certified as a Sex Education Nurse Practitioner?

Specializes in ER, ICU, L&D, OR.
OhOHYEAH- I finally found my specialty- Where can I get certified as a Sex Education Nurse Practitioner?

I will stay out of this and leave this alone

Yes Im chicken

Yes I keep my balls in the short grass

Someone ought to get "some guy" off the streets!! In one ER I worked it was "some dude" -always punching/hitting/stabbing people for NO REASON!! (he really gets around apparently!!) :rotfl:

A few weeks ago, we had a young guy walk into triage at 0300 stating that he just left another nearby hospital because he was waiting 4 hours, and that he was "severely injured" and needed to be seen right away. This guy proceedes to tell the triage nurse that he was walking down the street after leaving a restaraunt with his girlfriend and "some guy" just walked up to him and punched him in the face. He says "I fell down so, according to my girlfriend who is a med student, I must have a subdural hematoma". (Guy denies even hitting his head, but says "I must have a brain bleed if I got punched and lost my balance"!) This guy had absolutely NOTHING on his face or his head, nor had any scratches on him at all. Not even a hair out of place. This guy just kept rambling on and on about "the bleed in his brain" ect, when the triage nurse went to our "No BS" attending and told him to quickly see this guy so we dont have to fully triage and treat him. This guy then starts to tell the attending the story, when the attending cuts him off and asks his only question he needs to know: "why did you get punched out?". The guy becomes insulted and then starts to yell, when the attending then says "now I see why you got punched out". Takes a quick look at the back of the guys head, sees that there is nothing there and tells him to get the hell out of his ER. :rotfl:

When I heard all of this happen, I swear, I almost peed my pants!!!

Specializes in ER, HH, CTICU, corrections, cardiology, hospice.
Arrived via ambulance, Mild Headache 3 hour duration, hadnt tried any otc drugs. Bet he had a real headache when he got the er and ambulance bill :chuckle

Same scenario only headache pain 4/10. After fiddle farting around and treating only the pain, come to find out homey had a sub-dural bleed, transfered PDQ after that. You just never know for sure. :rolleyes: :uhoh3:

Loss of feeling in LLE s/t salami strapped to inner thigh and pants too tight to get off.

Tx: cut pants off and unstrapped salami.

Loss of feeling in LLE s/t salami strapped to inner thigh and pants too tight to get off.

Tx: cut pants off and unstrapped salami.

:rotfl: NNUUHHH-UUHHHH!!!!!!!!! :rotfl:

My own personal story..

Last night took my son to the local "after hours doc in the box" with a temp of 105.4 rectal "he is 2". Temp has been going on for a couple days but couldn't get it down last night.

Well at the minor emergency clinic we look him over for 2 hours can't find anything wrong with him. No UTI, red throat, cough, runny nose just really high fever. So Dr. tells me to have him to the local ER "just in case". I take him in and the nurse is rolling her eyes at me and seems bothered that I even was in the ER. I told her everything that the other Doc had done and said and she said "I guess he didn't think of a viral infection" and rolled her eyes again. So after 5 1/2 hours half a bag of fluids "he wouldn't eat or drink", blood culture, CBC, chest X-ray, the Dx is Pneumonia. Shot of Rocephin and a Rx for more antibiotics and we were on our way.

So in your opinion was this a ridiculous thing to bring him in for? I didn't get a chance to talk to the first nurse again to see if her attitude changed any.

I am still going my pre-nursing classes, so I don't know if pneumonia is a serious enough thing for ER. :imbar

Thanks you all!! :imbar

+ Join the Discussion