I was working a night shift on a tele floor as a new Nurse.
We had this one poor old lady who was confused and was restrained as usual for her safety. She was our designated resident nightmare geri from hell, so she was placed near the Nurse's station.
So we are chilling out at the Nurse's station, chatting and trying to get through another night...
Suddenly, out of the corner of my eye, I see our lady in question standing in the dimly lit doorway of her room!
I instantly leap out and run to her. As I approach her, she appears to be falling towards me, so I meet her in a bear hug...my arms around her waste, and her arms around my shoulders.
As I catch the lady, I notice a very strong smell of feces, and I feel something warm on my hands, arms and shoulders...
My fellow heroes come in behind me, and as the lights are turned on, my worst fears are instantly realized.
Yes, I caught the poor old lady with a good old bear hung football catch, but I was also covered in the lady's feces.
As I look at her, she has feces smeared all over her arms and hands... (and even her face!)
I work on a med-surg floor. Had a confused nursing home pt. in the geri chair at the nurses station so we could keep an eye on him. I asked him if he wanted a drink of water and he said yes. Got him a glass and ran to answer a call light. He must have been really thirsty cause I walked by a few minutes later and noticed that there was something yellow in his glass. Not thinking what it was I walked away and got about 10ft. when I realized that he had peed in the glass. I turned around to take it from him and he had the glass to his mouth and was drinking it. Thought I was going to puke.
Specializes in OB, critical care, hospice, farm/industr.
I've been a nurse since '86 and I have a million gross stories.
One of my favourites was a few years ago, a patient whose labour was being induced with Cervidil tape (applied directly to the cervix) handed me something when I entered the room. I held it in my bare hand puzzled, when she said in a gravelly, tequila-and-4-packs-a-day voice, "Hit fell outta mah cooter."
Like the smooth professional I am, when I realized it had been in her lady parts, I screamed and tossed it on the floor. I ate lunch with my hand held behind my back, because I was convinced I could still smell her crotchal area on my fingers*. Ick.
Specializes in midwifery, ophthalmics, general practice.
nurses............!
what is about our humour?????? :rotfl: :rotfl:
was with a bunch of nurses sitting in a university cafe......... we got thrown out for telling these sort of tales............apparently we were making 'normal' people feel sick...... :chuckle
explorer
190 Posts
That is discusting.