I was sitting with a patient in the CCU. He didn't speak any English. He needed his oxygen mask or his sat level would drop tremendously. He tried to take off his mask at least 5 times every minute, and I am not exaggerating. He also tried taking his foley out, his leads for the ekg, and kept touching the central line area. It was a busy day for me which I didn't mind. However, about 10 minutes before my shift was over, the patient's wife and son comes. While they were putting on their isolation gowns, the sons tells me I could leave since they are here. I told them another sitter is coming in about 10 minutes and I will leave as soon as the sitter comes. I guess the son went to the bathroom and the wife came in. I gave her my seat. The patient took his oxygen mask off again a few times within those short few minutes. I was standing waiting for my relief and the son comes in and says, he is just trying to adjust the mask. I told him politely, that he isnt trying to adjust the mask because he takes it off. He then tells me with the biggest attitude that I can leave. I told him I would and I would tell the sitter when he/she comes and ask the nurse what to do, until then I would wait by the door. He tells me thank you in the most sarcastic way. there was another nurse in the room, the one who takes care of the patient's dialysis. I'm standing outside the door and that son asks the nurse, so the sitter is just here because my dad takes his oxygen off? and that nurse remained silent. i was just very angry. i know i'm there to do my job, but i was there to help his dad out. i wasn't playing around. I just feel like people think it's just a useless job.
You should have been backed up by the nurse. We love you guys. So much better all around for everyone than restrainsts. Have upmost respect for all positions that help the pt.
I'm relatively new to nursing, and I'm learning how to kindly, but firmly, explain to patients and families why we are doing what we are doing. I'm developing an intolerance for family members who disrespect staff who are trying to take good care of their kids.
In your situation, I'd probably say something like, "Yes, she's here because your father keeps taking off his oxygen mask, and tried to pull out his foley catheter, and tries to take off the EKG leads. He has been alone with me all day. If he takes off his mask and no one is here his oxygen levels will drop and he might not be able to breathe well. If he pulls out the catheter he could suffer serious damage to his urinary tract. If he pulls off the EKG leads then the nurses won't know if he develops a life-threatening heart rhythm. Now, I'm sure you don't want any of those things to happen to him and this sitter has been kind enough to sit here with him all day making sure that he says safe. If you would rather your father didn't have a sitter, that's fine, but you'll need to have a family member stay with him 24 hours a day."
Sorry this happened to you. Nurses know that sitters are invaluable, and I'm sure they appreciated your help, even if they weren't brave enough to stick up for you. Brush it off, forget about it. You're job is important! If the family doesn't recognize that, it's their problem that they are ignorant. It doesn't have to be yours. :hug:
Please do not allow the ignorance of a few "ijits" sour you on what you do
Sitters are valuable resources that allow us nurses to continue taking care of everyone without worrying that so-and-so will tear open his urethra, take off his O2 and desat, pull out his IV and bleed out or cause infiltration, or even take off his tele and code even!
Family members who think they know what is best for their loved one need to be "educated" as to how often our poor patients may tear their urethra while trying to "pee" because they may be suffering from intermittent confusion/disorientation, how easy it is to pull out an IV and cause serious damage if the wrong med infiltrates into the tissue, how horrible it can be when the patient inadvertently takes off the O2 and begins to desaturate, feeling the tightness begin in the chest and the inability to pull in enough oxygen, causing increasing workload on the heart. You can also explain that as the patient's condition improves, the sitter service may be discontinued, but that in an acute setting where nurses cannot remain in the room the whole time, the sitter does an invaluable service by keeping the patient from harm, including falls that may cause further issues.
For those that still don't get it after that, don't waste your breath. Some people have enough IQ to power their brain-stem and little else. One can point at the moon and these brain surgeons will stare at the finger and wonder what you are trying to say.
I'm working as a sitter right now and my response is to call the patients nurse if the family has a problem with me in the room- that is our job to be there and if they don't like it send it up the chain of command.
We are there on DOCTORS orders and can't leave the room without a replacement.
As an RN who works with many patients in an ICU setting...not only would I be ecstatic you were there, I would have pointed out the obvious to the family...tactfully of course.
Regardless of culture (although culture most definitely plays a factor in the game of entitlement), the sadness and stress, and loss of control family members experience, will at times be directed at the wrong party. You, were that party.
The best you can do for yourself in situations such as this, is to clearly convey that you are not the enemy. Their loved one's illness is; you are there to aid in their comfort, well-being and recovery.
When my mother was in ICU, I gave her nurse absolute hell, and that was when I was 16. Unfortunately, the stress on a family member often gets projected onto the care takers undeservedly. If I had a nickel for every time a family member had an attitude, I would pay to have a runway installed at the hospital and take my private jet to work every day. It comes with the territory, and I wouldn't be surprised if he apologizes to you.
I would also recommend that you tell the RN when he attempts to remove oxygen or foley etc. It sounds like restraints may have been needed in some capacity for this patient.
he spoke out of ignorance. If you are being paid by the facility, report the son to your supervisor, especially if he is interfering with patient care. Otherwise, smile and keep doing what you know is right. Get a witness in the room if needed.
There is also something I call "Guilty Family Syndrome". These are people who neglect their elderly parents. Then when someone gets sick, they show their "love and concern" by constantly harrassing and finding fault with the caregivers.
I was sitting with a patient in the CCU. He didn't speak any English. He needed his oxygen mask or his sat level would drop tremendously. He tried to take off his mask at least 5 times every minute, and I am not exaggerating. He also tried taking his foley out, his leads for the ekg, and kept touching the central line area. It was a busy day for me which I didn't mind. However, about 10 minutes before my shift was over, the patient's wife and son comes. While they were putting on their isolation gowns, the sons tells me I could leave since they are here. I told them another sitter is coming in about 10 minutes and I will leave as soon as the sitter comes. I guess the son went to the bathroom and the wife came in. I gave her my seat. The patient took his oxygen mask off again a few times within those short few minutes. I was standing waiting for my relief and the son comes in and says, he is just trying to adjust the mask. I told him politely, that he isnt trying to adjust the mask because he takes it off. He then tells me with the biggest attitude that I can leave. I told him I would and I would tell the sitter when he/she comes and ask the nurse what to do, until then I would wait by the door. He tells me thank you in the most sarcastic way. there was another nurse in the room, the one who takes care of the patient's dialysis. I'm standing outside the door and that son asks the nurse, so the sitter is just here because my dad takes his oxygen off? and that nurse remained silent. i was just very angry. i know i'm there to do my job, but i was there to help his dad out. i wasn't playing around. I just feel like people think it's just a useless job.
I advise them to speak to the nurse. I never leave. If they want me to leave I kindly ask them to go find the nurse. I also tell them I'm unqualified to answer their questions and they must ask the nurse.
I bet the patient would not think it's a useless job.
Being a sitter is a very valuable job and requires a lot of patience and compassion...it's certainly NOT useless! The son may be in denial about his father's condition and current status. There may be several reasons that the nurse was silent -- she may have spoken with him in the past and realized that nothing she would say would make him satisfied, or she may have just been giving him a listening ear rather than rebutting what he was saying. Don't be offended or hold a grudge against her for that (nor against the son for that matter -- he is probably dealing with a lot of emotions and stress right now). You will come across situations like this often in healthcare. You did a great job caring for this man -- you and everyone here knows that. Keep up the good work!
loveu123
102 Posts
Don't let this family member's behavior get to u. As a nurse, im always very thankful to have a sitter for such patient.