What HAVE you said to patients???

mama_d, BSN, RN · Apr 6, 2011

Not from a nurse, but from a family memner...

19 yo male admitted with ETOH over 400 and drug screen positive for meth and coke. Giving staff holy heck...till Mom shows up, stands outside of the room listening to him for a few minutes. Mom walked into the room, politely asked for a few minutes alone with her son, and closed the door behind us.

We heard a couple of lous cracking sounds, followed by a tirade along the lines of "I didn't raise you to act this way" and "how dare you treat those women this way...you think you're a big man b/c you can push some girls around while you're laying here drunk and high?" It went on for a good ten minutes, and ended with a promise that he'd be disowned, his kid taken away, and his butt in jail for violating parole if he so much as opened his mouth one more time without a "please" and "thank you"...Mom was going to call the cops herself.

We all stood in the hall, dumbfounded, and decided that it would be rude to interfere with a Momma disciplining her son. He didn't give us any more trouble that stay.

Jaelle625 · Apr 6, 2011

Had a guy riding the high horse once about "protecting" his mother and insuring she got "the best of care". She was post OP, and the CNA went in to begin the post op vitals. The family, mainly the guy, started getting high and mighty with the CNA. The jest of what they said to her was that she was too young/immature to handle such detailed care as they expect. They went on to add that she seemed "too passive" and "not all that bright" to be doing a CNA's job. I overheard it and said not to worry about anymore vitals, I'd take care of doing them.
Two minutes later, they guy comes out and again begins expanding on why they don't want the CNA in his mother's room. "We want only the best for our mother and know how to get it." I explained to him I'd be handling the vitals and care myself for the rest of the night, hoping he'd be satisfied and go back in the room. Nope.
He then went on to explain to me how he is not completely happy with the care she received pre-op. "I don't see the nurses as often as I should. I don't know what they are doing but it can wait when my mother's care is involved. She comes first."
I gave him the "old man peering over his glasses" look and responded: "Well, sir, if you are in the habit of telling caretakers they are too young or stupid or immature when you see them in the room, I'm kinda understanding why you don't see them as often as you'd like."
He stared at me, not sure what to answer, and then started in with the "But its your job, so you have to do it regardless. Am I right? Aren't I? You have to go in."
My response: "Well, sir, you are the one out here telling me you don't see nurses as often as you'd like so, you tell me.............do we have to go in?"
I was expecting rage, to be fired from the assignment and to have to explain the whole thing to my manager the next day. Nope.
He apologised, went in the room, made all the family leave and came out to tell me "I'm leaving in ten minutes, no one will bother you guys anymore."
Me:

Don't we wish they would all turn out this way!

Jaelle625 · Apr 6, 2011

Not from a nurse, but from a family memner...
19 yo male admitted with ETOH over 400 and drug screen positive for meth and coke. Giving staff holy heck...till Mom shows up, stands outside of the room listening to him for a few minutes. Mom walked into the room, politely asked for a few minutes alone with her son, and closed the door behind us.
We heard a couple of lous cracking sounds, followed by a tirade along the lines of "I didn't raise you to act this way" and "how dare you treat those women this way...you think you're a big man b/c you can push some girls around while you're laying here drunk and high?" It went on for a good ten minutes, and ended with a promise that he'd be disowned, his kid taken away, and his butt in jail for violating parole if he so much as opened his mouth one more time without a "please" and "thank you"...Mom was going to call the cops herself.
We all stood in the hall, dumbfounded, and decided that it would be rude to interfere with a Momma disciplining her son. He didn't give us any more trouble that stay.

:yeah: YAY for Mom!!!

Jaelle625 · Apr 6, 2011

Had one of those grandmothers who just relished being waited on one time. She was, one of those people that........the better they felt, the needier they got. She was being D/C'd in the AM so she was MILKING it while she could.
My explination of how it works:
"See, I am here 8 hours. I have 8 patients. Thats basically one hour each patient. But, when you take the time out for getting report, my half hour break, documentation and everything else, its reall more like 8 patients and 6 hours. So, you get me for 45 min. when the math is all said and done. But it gets even better! Cause close to 20-30 min. of that time is spent doing your meds. So, at best, you have me for 25 minutes during the day. Now........if you want those 25 minutes to be spent opening and closing your blinds and moving the tissue box from here to there and back here again........its your choice. But when your 25 minutes are up...........they are up. So, if you need a breathing treatment or walked to the BR..........you might have to wait for someone else, cause I'm giving everyone else their 25 minutes. Oh, and BTW, I just spent 10 minutes explaining this to you."
Call light never went on again all night, except for breathing treatments and to walk to the BR.

:yeah: The last line made me literally LOL!

CrunchRN, ADN, RN · Apr 6, 2011

"But let me tell you about the balloon holding it in place, the one that will split your member down the middle as you yank it out, leaving it look like a microwaved hot dog.":lol2: :lol2: :lol2: :lol2: :lol2: :lol2: :lol2:

To all of you: :yeah: :yeah: :yeah: :yeah: :yeah: :yeah: :yeah: :yeah: :yeah: :yeah: :yeah: :yeah:

0402 · Apr 6, 2011

I had a drug seeking pt who was getting 4mg dilaudid q4h PRN. She constantly complained that we didn't push it fast enough. She told me, "I need it to hit me, um.... I mean take away the pain..." She kept asking me why I did it so slowly and I explained that the proper protocol was 2 mg over 2-4 minutes, so if she was getting 4mg, that mean I had to push it over 4-8 minutes. I educated her on respiratory depression caused by narcotics and that our goal was to reduce her pain without any unwanted effects of the drugs. She kept nagging me to just push it all in at once, every.single.time. I finally looked at her and said, "I don't have the time, energy or patience to deal with you not breathing tonight, if I can avoid it. I have 5 other pts, and if you would like your pain meds, you will get them administered the proper way and not one minute faster!" (I, of course, gave it over all 8 minutes every time, possibly closer to 10)

Mrs. SnowStormRN, RN · Apr 8, 2011

When I was a LPN working in long term care I was pulled to the Alzheimers Unit. I was given a very resistant patient. I tried to help her to her room and she rolled over my foot, hitting me with her newspaper and screamed, "Get your colored hands off of me! I dont want you people helping me!"

I politely stepped back, and said in my deepest southern accent, "Why ma'am, I'm not colored at all." She looked at me in disbelief, lol! Im sure she had no idea it was 2004. Oddly enough, none of the white nurses wanted to work with her either. SMH! it was a long night, but we worked as a team, thank goodness.

divaRN* · Apr 9, 2011

I had a pt who had not urinated in 24 hrs and was not going to urinate anytime soon . Bladder scan showed 775cc. Pt refusing a foley because "it will hurt" and in his mind if he doesnt pee he doesnt pee no big deal. He kept begging me for more time to pee. After a few hours of his antics I finally said to him " You have every right to refuse a foley. We can not force you to have one. It is your decision but if you are going to refuse one I just want you to be aware of the risks. If we do not get the urine out of your bladder you are at risk for it to rupture. You will then have urine in your abdominal cavity, need extensive surgery and end up with a foley. It will not be fun. The urine can also back up into your kidneys causing renal failure and a nasty UTI." Pt looked at me shocked that these thing were possible, started crying and let me put the foley in. After everything was done he said it wasnt that bad and he felt much better. :)

hecallsmeDuchess · Apr 12, 2011

Pt: rant, rant, rave, rave...and I don't even like you.

Me: I don't like you either. (oops, it slipped out before I could stop it but that shut the patient up and fetched me apologies from said patient)

schroeders_piano, RN · Apr 12, 2011

When I was putting a foley in a drunk 19 year old college boy he kept saying, "Isn't it nice? "

To which I replied, "Well, I'm having a little problem finding it. I guess they grow them small in this part of the county."

Shut him up real quick.

hecallsmeDuchess · Apr 13, 2011

When I was putting a foley in a drunk 19 year old college boy he kept saying, "Isn't it nice? "
To which I replied, "Well, I'm having a little problem finding it. I guess they grow them small in this part of the county."
Shut him up real quick.

:yeah: :yeah: :yeah: :yeah: :yeah: :up:

Horseshoe, BSN, RN · Apr 13, 2011

OMG, some of you have b@ll$ the size of boulders!:eek: :yeah: