What a blow to my ego

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I am currently doing my clinical practicum on a very busy ICU unit. I feel like I'm doing very well given that there is SO MUCH to know and SO LITTLE room for error. My preceptor has given me lots of positive feedback about things I do well and I ask every what I need to improve on (as well as working with other nurses), and I find that this has helped me learn a great deal.

HOWEVER.

Every night I give report to the oncoming nurse. My preceptor has named my report-giving skills and communication with the team as one of my strengths. However, this one particular nurse is just plain ******* to me when I'm trying to give her information. She walks up to me and says "I hate getting report from student nurses," then proceeds to interrupt me and correct me in a very rude fashion the whole time I'm giving report. Obviously, being ridiculed like this makes me flustered and less articulate, which probably confirms her beliefs that I am an idiot.

I have given report to this woman numerous times. Last time, I asked her if I needed to organize my report differently to suit her system (as she would now be taking the patient for 12 hours). She looked at me from like I was from outer space, sighed heavily, and told me "just ******* get on with it."

I don't know what to do. As a student, I don't feel like I have the weight to throw around to ask her to stop treating me so poorly. At the same time, my preceptor, who does have the weight, won't intervene and tells me "that's just how she is."

How do you deal with this sort of TERRIBLE workplace behavior?

I know it is hard, but I find people who are hard on me always tend to make me a better person. I am always choosing the hardest instructors to teach me, because it works.

Think of it this way, you are only with her for a short time, and it may cause you to hate your job, but she may be doing this for your own good. ICU can be very tough, and is not for the faint hearted, in my opinion of course. Try to take what you can from it. Remember when you are in her shoes, down the line in the future, with your own student, be hard on them but not rude. She if anything has taught you what not to do.

Chin up, it is almost over :cool:

I give them a stare that I hope says "you aren't going to get the reaction you want." :lol2: Something like the stare I give my kids when they about to do something they know isn't a good idea "Really? Is that the choice you're going to make?" Then I remain professional and go ahead with what I was going to say.

I gave this woman report again today, and she attempted her previous pattern of rude interruptions and swearing. I gave her this stare. Didn't say a darn thing, just looked at her, raised my eyebrows a bit, and stopped talking for a minute. Knowing this lady, I was half afraid she would start calling me names or something.

Let's just say the stare worked. She took the rest of report without interrupting and asked only appropriate questions about the patient...she still didn't seem too pleased to be there, but at least she wasn't being actively disruptive!

Specializes in -.

Wow this woman sounds so rude... !!

Sadly I heard a story like this last week...A student nurse and friend of mine in her final weeks of NS did hand over at a local hospital ER and all of the regular staff laughed in her face for being nervous and made rude remarks ...she lasted an hour before she went home in tears.

Sorry you have to go thru that. I just started clinicals last week and my nurse wasnt too happy getting stuck with students but I killed her with kindness and finally she smiled.

Specializes in Infusion Nursing, Home Health Infusion.

She is a bully and usually they are big fat cowards. She will keep after you until you draw the line in the sand. I say nip it in the bud....professionally confront her.....best to learn this early. I would say something like....use i messages....i do not like how rude you are being to me and i will not tolerate this type of behavior when i too am doing my best for this pt. Of course she will not like it...she will probably defend herself....call you a name behind your back but the odds are she will stop the bad behavior towards you....these type of people are usually not confronted....most avoid them.....yes it takes courage but you are also advocating for your pt as well. She is disrupting pt care. I might also throw in.....that someday i might be taking care of you or someone you love.....that has actually happened to me.....a ward sec was trashing me around the hospital......i confronted her....a few weeks later. She came onto my unit with a bowel obstruction. ...i was in charge. I gave her excellent care...got her out of pain.....she got great care....i am certain she felt like a complete ~~~.

I might also throw in.....that someday i might be taking care of you or someone you love.

Would be careful doing that as it could be construed to be a threat.

It could work as long as make it clear "and you would want me to be able to to be the best nurse I can be, so help me to learn to get better"

But in dealing with someone that is being spiteful to begin with, that is something that unless you can make it very clear that it is not aimed as a threat, and in the presence of someone ABOVE you or that nurse, would be best off leaving it unsaid. Someone that is spiteful can be very likely to twist your words and meaning.

Just look at this thread https://allnurses.com/nursing-news/policeman-vs-nurse-505857.html

Was "I hope you are never my patient" said as a threat? Probably not. Would think "i hope you are my patient someday" or "YOU had better hope you are never my patient" would be more likely threats.....but you take someone that wants to be spiteful or petty, and you end up with a nurse without a job.

I had this guy that liked to do that to me. One day he interrupted me and I just stopped talking and stared at him blankly. "Well?!?" he yells at me. I was like,"Oh!!! Were your finished talking? I just didn't want to interrupt, because that would be just RUDE!" and just gave him my sweetest smile. All the other nurses giggled and turned away. He doesn't interrupt me as much anymore. When he does, I just give him another loooong pause. I smile at him and act like I can take all night if he keeps it up. LOL

Just don't do anything like cuss or yell. You don't want to give her anything to report you on. Thats why I like the pause thing. What's she gonna say? You pause too long when interrupted?

Specializes in Med-Surg Nursing.
Just keep speaking over her when she interrupts. She can hold her questions until you are finished. She is being extremely rude.

Yep, this is what I do when a coworker interrupts me while I am giving end of shift report. I keep on talking. Her questions can wait until I'm done and 9 times out of 10, if she'd have kept her mouth shut and let me continue to talk, I'd have answered her question!:rolleyes:

Specializes in rehab and some telemetry.

if i were you i would give it right back, but in a professional way. "i don't like giving report to old crotchity nurses who don't remember what it was like to be a student." or throw in a few choice words if that'll make her feel better. stick up for yourself and maybe she'll respect you;)

You will never be able to appease this nurse. My guess is she has a few insecurities of her own. She needs to get over herself but probably won't.

I gave this woman report again today, and she attempted her previous pattern of rude interruptions and swearing. I gave her this stare. Didn't say a darn thing, just looked at her, raised my eyebrows a bit, and stopped talking for a minute. Knowing this lady, I was half afraid she would start calling me names or something.

Let's just say the stare worked. She took the rest of report without interrupting and asked only appropriate questions about the patient...she still didn't seem too pleased to be there, but at least she wasn't being actively disruptive!

Good Job!:yeah: The stare works great for recalcitrant children, fellow students, even goofy husbands at times. The last thing you want to do with a person like this is get into a verbal confrontation. The poster who says you will learn from even the meanest person is correct. I had an English GTA like that while doing my prereqs. I couldn't stand her, but I did learn something from her. It's hard when we are doing our best to do a good job and when someone continues to bust our chops for it. You have to be able to separate the wheat from the chaff with some reflection. Questions like: Am I missing something important because I don't like this person's delivery of criticism?

Another point to ponder is this: She isn't there to be nice to you (though a little courtesy goes a long way), she is there to take care of patients (and yes we hope she is nicer to them than you). When you depersonalize the criticism, you take the emotional sting out of it and it's easier to do something about it.

Rensoul :twocents:

It is not because you are a student. I am an experienced ICU nurse and very competent. Frequently, when attempting to give report to a night RN, I encounter the very same attitudes. I let them know that I am going to give them an appropriate, concise report because it is my duty to do so. Their response to it is NOT my responsibility. However, refusing to accespt report, which is what the nurse you described is doing, constitutes an unsafe practice as well as workplace violence and should be reported to her superiors.

........./wave

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