welcome to the hilton...please dont forget to tip your waitress

Nurses General Nursing

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i have no idea where the er is getting these people from but i wish theyd send them back...lol

they are sick..yes...but for goodness sakes!

i cant raise the head of my bed (i can however use the phone and change channels on my tv)

oh no im having chest pains...my chest really hurts (now while you go call the doc, im gonna call my friend and wish her happy birthday and then ill finish dinner while you warm up the ekg)

i REALLY REALLY REALLY have to go to the bathroom...right now..oh i have to go. i have to go NOW.

but first let me watch a little of the grammy's and chat with you a while. you just stay here until im ready to stand up then pivot to my bedside commode (i can do this, i can walk and EVERYTHING, i just need you to stand here)

could you heat my tray

could you heat my coffee

could you heat my coffee again...i didnt drink it yet

do you have any cream?

oh i hurt i hurt i hurt ...do you want your morphine? no thanks.

i dont like this food...get me something i like.

straighten up my bed (ill stand here and watch you)

i cant get in bed by myself (i can walk to the bathroom tho)

pull me up in bed (no theres nothing wrong with my legs, i just like you to do it)

this week has been CALL BELL HELL

Last night, I had a 20 year old...severe rlq pain x 2 months...n/v all day. was seen in 2 other er's already yesterday but obviously did not like what she was told there, so she wanted to see what our docs thought. Refused pelvic because she had one done by her gyn last month. "It is just too painful" she says. Ok, then she is to go for a CT scan..refused to drink the contrast because the phenergan only made her sleepy, it did not help the nausea (although I never once saw her vomit in the entire 8 hours she was there). Only the dilaudid was helping her nausea at all according to her???Refused a NG tube for the contrast, but was much too sick to go home because the Dilaudid is the only thing that helped. Finally, practically forced her to drink the contrast, gave her some reglan (just in case) and she went over to have her CT. The tech called to tell me she had vomited the "entire" amount of contrast...Luckily it had been almost 2 hours since she drank it...Did it anyway, found NOTHING of course...so, she had the US at one hospital, abdominal series at another and a CT. Many labs and urine, and guess what...everything was oddly normal..but she continued to cry until she was admitted for "abd pain".

She kept saying, "I think that my appendix has grown back", she had it removed 5 years ago..

I think so too and filled her head with $--t..

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Specializes in 5 yrs OR, ASU Pre-Op 2 yr. ER.

Last night a pt. wanted something to drink. Not just ANY drink. She wanted the new Coke with Lime. Oh and make that DIET please?

Needless to say i told her our prune-juice-storage fridge does not seem to have any Diet Lime Coke. And she was SURPRISED we didn't have it! But i was dying to say "Ya want fries with that??"

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Specializes in LTC, CPR instructor, First aid instructor..

Heh! It may have slipped right on out of my mouth before I had a chance to hold it back. :rotfl:

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You have 4 healthy limbs, each working correctly and you call me into the room to fluff your pillows?

Suuure, I'll be delighted to give you some pillow therapy...now just hold still...stop squirming from under the pillow!

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Specializes in 5 yrs OR, ASU Pre-Op 2 yr. ER.

Someone asked for Caress soap to shower with the other morning. (said our soap "stinks", well if it smelled good, then people might want to take it HOME...) I wanted to reply that it's kept at Wal-Mart, and this ain't Wal-Mart. Do people actually think we have a stock variety of soap????

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Common now, where's your sense of customer satisfaction??? Our soap smells? Oh no!!! Let me go to the ATM machine, watch my 7 patients for me please! While I deplete me checking funds. Now keep an eye out for room 7 as he likes to climb out of bed and fall, while I run to bath and body works and buy from my own paycheck, a fragrance that will best suit you.

We wouldn't want a fragrance conflict in the ER now would we..... :rotfl:

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Good idea, heart queen. While you are at it, pick those cokes my pt wanted.

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Specializes in 5 yrs OR, ASU Pre-Op 2 yr. ER.

And make that a DIET LIME coke please.....

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Specializes in Psych, Med/Surg, Home Health, Oncology.

Hi

Oh my Gosh---am I glad I checked this thread!! I just came home from the WeekEnd Fron Hell!! and believe me did this help cheer me up!! i am laughing so hard!!

Everyone one of these things happened this weekend!! What a group we had!! They were all AWFUL!! Lites on every 5 seconds with demands, demands, demands & in all 3 nights, only one guy ever said THANK YOU!!

When he said Thank You I nearly cried!

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Specializes in ER, ICU, L&D, OR.

I did get a kiss from a beautifull blue eyed blonde the other night saying thank you

she was almost 2 yrs old

still made my night

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Specializes in Trauma, MICU.

I'm not a nurse yet...but I feel for you all soooooo much!!!

Makes me glad I was nice to my nurses when I had my son!

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Specializes in LTC, CPR instructor, First aid instructor..

:hatparty I'll have some steamed lobster with a crab salad on the side. Oh, and whatever you do, :nono: DON'T FORGET THE COCKTAOLS AND DESSERT! I will have a tall cool, creamy pina colada, with some luscious white chocolate raspberry cheesecake. NOW GO GET IT! :rotfl: :chuckle

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