Watch Your Language - Breast Isn't Best!

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And because I love to stir up the winds of controversy, I'll share this article with everyone and see what they think.

http://www.bobrow.net/kimberly/birth/BFLanguage.html

What do you all think of this article?

Alison

I figured I would chime in here because this thread really hits home with me. I planned on breastfeeding all of my children and what a nightmare from the beginning. My first daughter was born with an encephalocele so she was in the NICU for the first 2 weeks of her life. I informed the nurses, my doc and anyone who would listen that I planned on b/fing. After she was born (by cesarean) they brought me pump and so they could give her my breastmilk through her NG tube. I did this for 4 days until the time came when her and I both were ready to attempt an actual feeding. I went to the NICU that day held her in my arms, got her in position and she wouldnt latch on. Her sucking reflex was so poor that there was no way she could latch on properly. So the nurse suggested we do bottle feeds until her sucking improved, the LC was opposed but it was at that time I knew b/f was not going to happen.

When I had my second daughter, once again I was fully prepared to b/f. Everyone was aware of it, and so the LC was called in. After she was born, and ready for her first feeding, the LC guided me and we got her latched on. Finally! Everything seemed to be doing fine. At my daughters 1 week doc appointment she had lost almost a lb. Her ped was concerned she wasnt getting adequate nutrition and recommended I see my OB/GYN. I made the appointment that day, and seen my doc the next day. He performed a breast exam and said that my ducts were appeared to be inactive. I had a breast ultrasound done and sure enough I wasnt producing any milk at all. For that first week of my daughters life, I was starving my baby to death. Talk about guilt!

With my third daughter, I tried to breatfeed again. This time I didnt wait a week, I took my daughter in for daily weigh ins at her peds and when she started to show signs of weight loss, I went to my doctor and sure enough the same thing. I wasnt producing any milk.

With my fourth daughter, I tried again and once again the same thing. The docs dont know why this is the case for me, some say its hormonal others say its physical, but no matter, I still was unable to b/f any of my children like I had wanted to.

To say that a parent should feel guilty about not choosing the best possible nutrition for their baby is ludicrous. I cried every night from the guilt that I felt, and every time I had to make that formula bottle I cried at the thought.

On a good note though, with the exception of my first born, my daughters are healthier than their playmates who have been breastfed. They are 9, 7 and 2 and so far NO Ear infections, colds, ETC. They have to be the healthiest children I know, (knock on wood). As for being smart. Well, I agree that it really depends on what you do with your children. I read to my kids every night and still do.

Do I feel guilty now, NO WAY! I know that I did my best and for reasons beyond my control was I unable to b/f. I strongly believe that no matter what the reasons are, no mother should feel guilty for not choosing to b/f and that is coming from someone who so desperately want to do so.

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First, the majority of mothers, breastfeeding or not, spend a lot of sleepless time the first few weeks. That's pretty normal.

Now, your language is interesting! "When do the advantages of breastfeeding ...." What if the language was phrased, "How long should mothers work at breastfeeding/nursing before subjecting their babies to the clear disadvantages/health risks of formula feeding?" Feeling an obligation to provide a child with breastmilk is not an altogether negative thing, either, just like we feel an obligation to get them good medical care, vaccines, car seats, etc.

And a mother should not be going at this alone for "weeks". She should have access to lactation consultants and knowledgeable folk who will fully support her decision to nurse. Sadly, too many pediatricians, who are at the front line of breastfeeding management, know very little about the subject and know little else other than to recommend the bottle. They don't know to suggest a plethora of strategies to help mom through the tough times, up to and INCLUDING ordering from a milk bank and referring on to good IBCLC's.

Banked milk is very expensive and SOME insurance companies will coer the cost, but only if medically necessary. You also need a prescription from the dr to get the milk. The price for banked milk runs around $3 per ounce!! It is referred to as a "processing fee". If you have the milk shipped to you, it can cost from 30-70 dollars. Got this info from http://www.milkbanksj.org. I am sure the price varies from place to place. I would never be able to afford to feed my baby this way! He drinks 4 oz per feeding...that is 12 dollars per bottle of milk!

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"STUDIES SHOW"! Would someone mind telling me where I can actually find 'THE STUDIES' that supposedly prove that breastfeeding produces smarter and healthier babies?

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Specializes in ICU, ER, HH, NICU, now FNP.

I posted a link to all of the studies in my earlier post.....

Furthermore there are SEVERAL journals completely dedicated to JUST breast milk and breastfeeding.

Know who funds most of the research? Formula companies....

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"STUDIES SHOW"! Would someone mind telling me where I can actually find 'THE STUDIES' that supposedly prove that breastfeeding produces smarter and healthier babies?

I don't know if you were addressing my post but the study I was speaking of was actually from Denmark (not Sweden) and it can be found in the May 2002 issue of Today's Science I believe it was retrieved at http://www.2facts.com according to my bibliography. There is plenty of scientific evidence citing more advanced neurodevelopment amongst breastfed infants as opposed to bottlefed. You can do a search through an academic/medical search engine for it. I could send you my bibliography if you PM me.

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Another post said quote "Isn't our job as mothers to do the best we can for our children?". I feel that my choice to formula feed IS the best that I can do for my child! I DO NOT feel guilt at all about my decision. Kudos to the ladies that are able to breast feed but KUDOS to those of us who can not and make the choice to do what we think is best for our child!

Interesting that you state "Kudos to those of us who can not", I see that as a big difference from those who wont. If a mother tries and can't for some major reason, it is understandable but what about mothers who just don't care? Who think its gross or icky? You know what...to each his own. My personal opinion is that almost every mom should at least try-I'll leave out the drug addicted mothers who shouldn't be having babies to begin with. :o

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To say that a parent should feel guilty about not choosing the best possible nutrition for their baby is ludicrous. I cried every night from the guilt that I felt, and every time I had to make that formula bottle I cried at the thought.

In your case, you obviously didn't choose not to bf. It just couldn't happen. I'm sorry to hear that you had some many problems. For something that should come naturally, you'd think it would be easier. :rolleyes:

I think when we talk about parents feeling guilty, we're talking about women who never consider the benefits of bf, or rather the risks of formula feeding :p , before deciding that they won't even try to nurse their babies.

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In your case, you obviously didn't choose not to bf. It just couldn't happen. I'm sorry to hear that you had some many problems. For something that should come naturally, you'd think it would be easier. :rolleyes:

I think when we talk about parents feeling guilty, we're talking about women who never consider the benefits of bf, or rather the risks of formula feeding :p , before deciding that they won't even try to nurse their babies.

That is exactly what I was trying to say. :)

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I like folks who stir up controversy however in the case of breast feeding, as a grandmother who has just lived through a situation with a daughter who for some reason(no one can diagnosis) was unable to generate enough breast mile for her infant daughter, after three weeks of q2hour trying to get babe to latch and a trip back to the hospital at 24 hours old due to jaundice - withstanding all the pressure -- oh your milk will come in, three weeks later no milk, no answers just a very tired mom and unhappy babe. Once switched to bottle feeding, babe and mom both improved dramatically. Breast feeding isn't for everyone and making moms feel guilty for giving up is cruel and inhuman punishment.

And because I love to stir up the winds of controversy, I'll share this article with everyone and see what they think.

http://www.bobrow.net/kimberly/birth/BFLanguage.html

What do you all think of this article?

Alison

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I like folks who stir up controversy however in the case of breast feeding, as a grandmother who has just lived through a situation with a daughter who for some reason(no one can diagnosis) was unable to generate enough breast milk for her infant daughter, after three weeks of q2hour trying to get babe to latch and a trip back to the hospital at 24 hours old due to jaundice - withstanding all the pressure -- oh your milk will come in, three weeks later no milk, no answers just a very tired mom and unhappy babe. Once switched to bottle feeding, babe and mom both improved dramatically. Breast feeding isn't for everyone and making moms feel guilty for giving up is cruel and inhuman punishment.

And because I love to stir up the winds of controversy, I'll share this article with everyone and see what they think.

http://www.bobrow.net/kimberly/birth/BFLanguage.html

What do you all think of this article?

Alison

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Specializes in ICU, ER, HH, NICU, now FNP.

The story you tell is one I hear a lot - it also means that the proper help has not been gotten! Sorry to hear you had such a rotten experience and I'm glad some solution was finally resolved, there should be no guilt in giving it your best effort!!!!

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Have you all noticed the advertisements at the bottom of the screen targeted to whatever the discussion is about? I had to click on this one

http://babacaddy.com/

it is for a bottle holder for the baby so that mom can get on with life while baby feeds itself! hmmm too bad those boobs don't detach so you can leave one with the baby :rotfl:

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