Want to be a nurse, just no butt wiping or other yucky stuff please

Gooselady, BSN, RN · Apr 8, 2015

I used to gag at the thought of suctioning, but now that I do it all the time, it is just as satisfying as disempacting someone.

It's the same feeling you get after delousing someone. There is great satisfaction in ridding another person of some foulness that is encroaching upon their immediate well-being. You feel like you are really doing something important. I had to get in a shower with a psych patient in San Diego, she lived on the beach, and as I was combing what seemed like pounds of sand ground into her hair, I realized it was head lice. I'd pull the comb through her hair and *plop*, this blob of lice bodies would hit the tile floor. Her hair was fairly long (in some places) and you could see each time she was 'colonized' by head lice, every inch or so there would be tons of nits all stuck together, so that she had four or five levels of nits going from her scalp to the ends of her hair.

It felt good to get her cleaned off. I deloused a gentleman with a whole body infestation due to being very hairy. It took three Nix et al showers plus all over whole body treatment to finally get them all. I couldn't believe it when we put him in the shower the third day (so we could take him off contact precautions) and he STILL had lice in his chest and stomach hair.

fsalazar1 · Apr 8, 2015

It's sad to me that people don't understand everything that nursing entails even after going through nursing school. I've had new nurses precept under me before, and I remember a few of them being shocked that in ICU (sometimes) there was no CNA and that I cleaned my patient twice that day....even more shocked when I asked for their help. I'm not saying that cleaning the patients is the best part of the job, but I'm crazy enough to say that it's my favorite part. I guess it's the dignity that it gives a patient who can't do for themselves while I assist them that brings me joy. I want new nurses to understand that it's not a fairy tale and to think long and hard before they go into nursing. More times than some, in order to be an NP, you must have some bedside experience, so I wouldn't go into nursing with the idea that I'll be all superior and above human service.....because when you work with people directly in any capacity, you will have some "dirty work" to deal with.

Farawyn · Apr 8, 2015

I chase after my kids with an ear irrigation bulb all the the time. I always feel like I help them HEAR better. And the goop that comes out is just fun.

Red Kryptonite · Apr 8, 2015

Who said they hate suctioning? I will suction any/all of your patients if you empty my patient's colostomy bags.
Love mucous and sputum. I even like charting about it...The words viscous, tenacious and copious feed my soul! Yes!

Watched a nurse suction a guy's trach the other night and told the oncoming nurse that that mucus wasn't tenacious, it was spackle. Got a good laugh out of her, but I was serious.

I'll get right on those colostomies for ya. The stuff that comes out of people's mouths and throats is usually what makes me want to vomit.

Farawyn · Apr 8, 2015

Watched a nurse suction a guy the other night and told the oncoming nurse that that mucus wasn't tenacious, it was spackle. Got a good laugh out of her, but I was serious.
I'll get right on those colostomies for ya. The stuff that comes out of people's mouths and throats is usually what makes me want to vomit.

Okay, next time we work together I gotchu and you got me. Deal.

RNsRWe, ASN, RN · Apr 8, 2015

You should have directed her to Allnurses. That'd set her straight. :)

Nah. We'd just get blasted for being all Negativity-like, and eating our young'uns. Sigh.

RNsRWe, ASN, RN · Apr 8, 2015

Who said they hate suctioning? I will suction any/all of your patients if you empty my patient's colostomy bags.
Love mucous and sputum. I even like charting about it...The words viscous, tenacious and copious feed my soul! Yes!

LOL...you are truly twisted, my friend.

prmenrs, RN · Apr 8, 2015

On my Instagram account the other day, a girl was talking about how there was a huge nursing shortage all of the USA. She made of list of reasons to become a nurse that included 1. The demand for new grads 2. The "boatloads" of money you make and 3. The fact that new grads can get hired into their specialities anywhere because of the shortage.
Instead of just minding my own business and moving along.... I made a comment. I should NOT have done that, lol!
I said- "There are only shortages of nurses in certain areas of the USA. Make sure to do your research first"
She responded to me- "Well I'm a Pre-Nursing student and from what I understand nurses are in high demand. That's all I ever see! So stop being negative and pleaseeeeee take a seat"
Yikes haha :) Taught me to never do that again!

I wouldn't be able to resist asking her to contact me latter for an "I told you so!" :cheeky:

Here.I.Stand, BSN, RN · Apr 8, 2015

Oops, you tossed some sand on her DREEEEEAAAAAAAM. I'm curious how she'll respond when she doesn't get an ICU, ED, or L&D job right out of school. :whistling:

On my Instagram account the other day, a girl was talking about how there was a huge nursing shortage all of the USA. She made of list of reasons to become a nurse that included 1. The demand for new grads 2. The "boatloads" of money you make and 3. The fact that new grads can get hired into their specialities anywhere because of the shortage.
Instead of just minding my own business and moving along.... I made a comment. I should NOT have done that, lol!
I said- "There are only shortages of nurses in certain areas of the USA. Make sure to do your research first"
She responded to me- "Well I'm a Pre-Nursing student and from what I understand nurses are in high demand. That's all I ever see! So stop being negative and pleaseeeeee take a seat"
Yikes haha :) Taught me to never do that again!

RNsRWe, ASN, RN · Apr 8, 2015

Oops, you tossed some sand on her DREEEEEAAAAAAAM. I'm curious how she'll respond when she doesn't get an ICU, ED, or L&D job right out of school.

Then those units obviously won't be deserving of her. SHE has a calling, THEY just have to recognize that

cardiacfreak, ADN · Apr 8, 2015

Another important aspect of nursing I failed to mention: in order to thrive in the profession, butt kissing is also a must. Ego stroking and brown nosing are very useful skills.

I have the wiping down to an art. Still struggling with the kissing!

TheBlackDogWaits · Apr 8, 2015

An addendum:

I can guarantee you, nurse aspirant who doesn't like yucky stuff, that some days you will wish butt wiping was all that was required of you. Just saying...