Update on Transgender nursing Student

[Transgender_n_TN]

Well, I don't know how many people have followed my thread on being a transgender nursing student. I have read all the responses and weighed out the most logical and prudent sounding advice. As suggested, I approached someone in Administration, who at first said there was nothing in the school bylaws that would stop me from transitioning at school and was very encouraging and positive this would not even be an issue. This person said let them consult with other members of Administration and the President. My name was never given to anyone in Administration or so I was told.

I have waited many weeks for an answer, over a month has went by. When finally a few days ago, I got a call to come up to the school so they could discuss with me the decision the school had reached. The answer was a negative, that I COULD NOT transition at school:no:. Furthermore, I was given to understand they consulted with an outside governing body that laid down this decision. This governing body stated "This is not within the schools foundational values and such a thing would go counter to the schools morals and values." I was told by said person in Administration that I could not come to school "openly and publically" as a female, but what I did in my personal life had no reflection on the school.

So it is with regret:bluecry1: that I am transfering from this schools nursing program as soon as I have completed as much coursework as I can and transfer to another nursing school within the city.

[SuesquatchRN, BSN, RN]

Is this a relision-based institution?

I'm sorry you're being given shuch short shrift.

[Jules A, MSN]

that is disappointing but as i recall this was a "religious" school? if so i think at the very least it is encouraging that they weren't being judgmental with regard to what you do in your personal time if you had been willing to wait and transition after graduating. no worries you will find a better fit elsewhere. wishing you all the best.

[ParkerBC,MSN,RN, PhD, RN]

does the school accept openly gay students into the program? if so, then how can the school say that your gender reassignment “would go counter to the schools morals and values”. most public schools are all about diversity including the glbt population. does the school have a glbt organization on campus? if so, then how would your transition counter the schools morals and values if the school openly supports the glbt community? how do the other classmates and instructors feel about your decision? if there are no concerns, then what is the problem?

as for the transfer of credits, make sure you double check with the school you are looking to transfer to. i know my school does not accept any transfer credits with the exception of a few general education courses. if you are already in the program, the last thing i would do is transfer. can you hold out on the transition until you finish school? i understand if you say no.

well, good luck in whatever you decide. i hope it all works out for you.

[teeniebert, LPN]

I'm sorry you're unable to continue your education at your current school. That said, I'd like to congratulate you on continuing toward your transition. I can't honestly say 'I know how hard it is,' but I do know that it was not an easy decision. Good luck in all that you do.

[AOx1]

What a difficult position to be in! It seems you have a few options. You could:

Continue with part of your transition (ex- hormones if you plan to take them, legal name change) leaving surgery until after graduation. This would allow you to be true to yourself while still meeting the letter of the law. I don't think they really have a right to test you for any drug that is not illicit, so as others have mentioned, don't ask, don't tell. Seems you should have the legal right to change your name, as students do it all the time when they marry.

Or, you could wait entirely until you graduate. Nursing school is highly stressful and I can't imagine the stress of transitioning in addition to that. I hate to see you lose credits you have worked so hard to earn, but if you choose that option, continue to seek support/counseling as you wait. I hate to think that a delay would cause you to feel like you are hiding your true self.

Finally, you could just transfer to another school. I suppose the reason this option makes me sad is that there was recently a time when because of someone's race, they were barred from equal opportunity to seek education. I realize you are a person and not a "cause" but on the other hand, the only way for some poeple to learn is by meeting people who are different than them and recognizing that we all want the same basic things- happiness, respect, love, and a chance to better the world.

You might consider seeking the advice of a legal aid (or similar program) attorney in your area. I realize that as a private school, there may be different rules/rights, but you should be aware of the laws in your area. Good luck and God bless.

[Ruby Vee, BSN]

i guess if this is a religious school, they have the right to dictate "morals" but it bites, doesn't it?! good luck with a more open-minded school. perhaps this is a blessing in disguise -- you're more likely to meet like-minded students in a more open-minded school! anyway, i wish you well.

[caliotter3]

I'm sorry to hear that their decision was negative. I hope you do not transfer if you find out that you will be shorted on course credit. No reason to suffer any more than necessary because of this decision. Is there any way that you could see yourself delaying your transition until school is finished? I hate to see you having to go through the stress of finding another program, getting admitted, and starting all over, unless you feel you absolutely have to. Good luck and best wishes for your future.

[Transgender_n_TN]

I start this response by saying thank you, to all the people who have expressed concern and regret. It's nice to see people who actually care about another person.

To answer a few questions and concerns expressed in this thread:

1. I DO start my clinicals Fall '09 at my current school. I only have one more trimester of gen ed, then I will do health assessment, pharm I, and intro to professional nursing the summer before I start my clinicals. I'm trying to pull my grades back up high enough to transfer to another area NS. Through my job, I know many of the instructors in both institutes programs.

2. I have put off what I have wanted to do with my life for others my entire life. I've given to others till there was nothing left to give and still I gave more. Without sounding selfish (hopefully):uhoh21:, I promised myself that I would not continue to allow other's to dictate how I lived my life. There was always worry about this one being shunned and/or ostracized because of how I live. I have relatives who have been in denial since I came out many moons ago and still refuse to see me for who I am rather than what I am. I am tired of being alienated in my own life for things I can't really control.

3. This will ensure future success and happiness for me. I've been unhappy too many years. This year i've been more at peace with myself. And by transitioning while in college, there will be no issues of changing my name years later and not being able to use the degree that I have worked so hard to obtain.

4. I feel that a public school will be more accepting and diverse, than my current school. I will not put my current NS down. They have an excellent program, with great instructors and wonderful rapport with the students. But my needs can not be met here.

I am really looking forward to starting my clinicals, but I will put them off until I have either been accepted into another program or they change policy. Seeing that a policy change won't happen this side of Heaven, i'll be transfering to another program. lol

[missjennmb]

The way you are handling this is amazing to me. Its great that you have reached a point where you can see the good even with the bad. I think you will be much happier outside of this religious college. While I believe that religion has its place, I cannot imagine you ever being treated completely without bias at a school where they believe that who you are is "wrong".

At one time in my life, I lived over a year with another woman, even had my parents' help moving into our apartment together (1 big bed for us, 2 bunk beds for our 2 boys) and we always held hands and made all of our big decisions/spent holidays together and my parents STILL refused to see us as lesbians. To this day, my mother says that it did not happen. People sometimes cannot see what they cannot handle unfortunately. They don't realize how that hurts us.

[Mr Ian]

I obviously missed the original thread and sorry if this is just repeating old opinions -

Gender reassignment is a medical procedure - but the place that teaches you to care for people that undergo medical procedures - won't accept your decision to transgender.

How ironic.

And unfortunate.

I guess the religion thing gets them out of being called on discriminatory practice?

An organisation that is commited to the unconditional love of all fellow humans - is allowed to circumvent our social laws on how we prefer to treat individuals.

Is this the Church of the Ironical Mother and Saint Hypocrisy?

I hate religion. It's so redundant.

But I love God. She seems like a nice woman.

Good luck.

[Transgender_n_TN]

Well, i've never been one for religion either. I've listened to too many lectures, sermons and condemnations on "deviant" lifestyles. I've also heard stories and experiences with men in established religion.