Tubal Ligation Failure

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:uhoh3:How often does female sterilization fail? Has anyone had this happen to them? How did they feel? I just found out I am pregnant and I'm very upset. I have 4 kids and underwent tubal ligation two years ago. I'm pushing 40 and I'm not thrilled with the idea of another child. I felt like my family was complete. Because of my beliefs, I wouldn't have an abortion but I don't feel happy about this child. Do other people feel this way?

KY-RN,

I'm curious about the ages of the four children that you have?

I had my unplanned 3rd child when our first two were 12 and 10. I was depressed most of the pregnancy but oh my goodness, what a joy and a blessing she is. In fact she's working on her BSN as I speak.

God bless, things will work out.:redbeathe

Thanks.

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Specializes in PCCN.

I dont think the person battling infertility was trying to make the op feel bad; she was just pointing out the unfairness of things- those who want children cant have them, and those that dont want any more end up with them any way. It's that part that sucks. hopefully op situation comes out ok.

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Specializes in Emergency Dept. Trauma. Pediatrics.
I dont think the person battling infertility was trying to make the op feel bad; she was just pointing out the unfairness of things- those who want children cant have them, and those that dont want any more end up with them any way. It's that part that sucks. hopefully op situation comes out ok.

I don't know, it seems like their are a few posts trying to make the OP feel bad. The world is unfair for a zillion reasons, I just don't think then when someone is obviously upset about a pregnancy, that is the place for the comments about how unfair things are or how they should be thankful and so on.

Maybe it's just me.

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Don't let anyone make you feel bad. People who want babies don't understand what it feels like NOT to want one. I'm personally in a situation right now where I absolutely don't want kids, and just the idea of me being pregnant horrifies me.

Thanks for sharing your story. I had no idea tubal ligation did fail. How come they won't invent a 100.00% effective birth control method?! :confused:

If you aren't going to abort or go the adoption route, the best you can do is accept it and make the best of a bad situation. Try to find a way to look at it as a blessing. Perhaps once it's born, you'll bond, and these misgiving feelings will vanish? Focus on the good things you have going for you. It's wonderful your partner is soooo supportive. In today's world, it seems like a miracle to find a guy who wants kids & is active in the family & raising the kids. Just having both parents together and in a loving happy relationship is a huge asset to the baby and it's worth far more than fancy designer clothes or expensive toys.

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Specializes in Med-Surg/home health/pacu/cardiac icu.

My children are 14(twins), 6, & 2.

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Specializes in Emergency Dept. Trauma. Pediatrics.
Don't let anyone make you feel bad. People who want babies don't understand what it feels like NOT to want one. I'm personally in a situation right now where I absolutely don't want kids, and just the idea of me being pregnant horrifies me.

Thanks for sharing your story. I had no idea tubal ligation did fail. How come they won't invent a 100.00% effective birth control method?! :confused:

If you aren't going to abort or go the adoption route, the best you can do is accept it and make the best of a bad situation. Try to find a way to look at it as a blessing. Perhaps once it's born, you'll bond, and these misgiving feelings will vanish? Focus on the good things you have going for you. It's wonderful your partner is soooo supportive. In today's world, it seems like a miracle to find a guy who wants kids & is active in the family & raising the kids. Just having both parents together and in a loving happy relationship is a huge asset to the baby and it's worth far more than fancy designer clothes or expensive toys.

Well I don't have a uterus, I think the odds are in my favor of not having a whoopsie! LOL Although their has been a rare thing of an egg attaching to a stomach and not in the uterus :|

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Specializes in ICU.
I dont think the person battling infertility was trying to make the op feel bad; she was just pointing out the unfairness of things- those who want children cant have them, and those that dont want any more end up with them any way. It's that part that sucks. hopefully op situation comes out ok.

While she is completely justified in her feelings, and many here can relate, sympathize or empathize...Out of respect for the OP's circumstance and feelings, this particular thread may not be an appropriate venue for her to air her feelings of dismay.

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Specializes in Med/Surg.
While she is completely justified in her feelings, and many here can relate, sympathize or empathize...Out of respect for the OP's circumstance and feelings, this particular thread may not be an appropriate venue for her to air her feelings of dismay.

Are you saying that the OP shouldn't post about her situation at all? That's not fair, either. You could say that about just about ANY circumstance, so do you suggest that no one ever post anything personal?

Rather, it perhaps isn't the thread to read if someone is battling infertility. While I cannot imagine how painful that is, it doesn't mean that because some people struggle with infertility that the OP can't feel how she feels about her current situation, or be able to come here, among "friends," to get things off her chest. You wouldn't tell a patient who's upset about an unplanned/unexpected pregnancy that they should be happy, since they are infertile and would change places with them. Respect for someone's feelings sometimes involves not making it personal. Or making them feel guilty for feeling that way in the first place.

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Specializes in ICU.
Are you saying that the OP shouldn't post about her situation at all? That's not fair, either. You could say that about just about ANY circumstance, so do you suggest that no one ever post anything personal?

Rather, it perhaps isn't the thread to read if someone is battling infertility. While I cannot imagine how painful that is, it doesn't mean that because some people struggle with infertility that the OP can't feel how she feels about her current situation, or be able to come here, among "friends," to get things off her chest. You wouldn't tell a patient who's upset about an unplanned/unexpected pregnancy that they should be happy, since they are infertile and would change places with them. Respect for someone's feelings sometimes involves not making it personal. Or making them feel guilty for feeling that way in the first place.

Read my post again. I believe you misunderstood.

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Specializes in Med/Surg.
Read my post again. I believe you misunderstood.

I read it a couple of times, actually, and while I might have misunderstood, I couldn't figure out how else you could have meant it?

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Specializes in ICU.
I read it a couple of times, actually, and while I might have misunderstood, I couldn't figure out how else you could have meant it?

I suggest you also read the quote that precedes it. Perhaps then you'll have found the appropriate context.

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KYRN, I totally understand how you must feel. I have 4 children and am 39. My husband was just telling me he wanted 1 more and for some of the same reasons you feel, I didnt think it was a good idea either. The economy is so bad right now, and Im not even in nursing school yet.

At least you have a stable job and Im sure the older kids will be a big help with the new baby. Try to be happy and think positive. I bet you will wonder what you were so worried about in 4 or 5 years down the road. My youngest is going to be 6 next month and the time has flown by!

How old are your other kids?

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