Things people say coming out of anaesthetic

Nurses General Nursing

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I had my wisdom teeth out on Friday, and when I came too the anaesthetist told me I'd been 'showing him some affection with my fingernails'. :imbar I don't even know what he meant because I couldn't talk properly and then they put the oxygen mask on me to shut me up. I hope it was something innocent, that table is pretty much on groin level :lol2:. He was quite dishy too!

Since then I've been comforting myself with the thought that the staff had probably heard worse things from patients. So, what's the funniest thing you've heard from someone coming out from under anaesthetic?

Specializes in Cardiac Telemetry, Emergency, SAFE.

Ive heard a few different things:

*pirate jokes

*asking "wheres the sexy nurse at?"

*telling everyone they hope they didnt "Poo" themselves (poo was not the word they used*

*trying to pinch tushes

*marriage proposals

*LOTS of cursing, that would make a sailor blush.

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Specializes in Geri, Home Health, OB GYN.

Since I have been put under quite a few times here are my favorites:

*Mosty recently, "It tasted like bubble gum." several times... refering to the numbing spray for my TEE.

* Tell the old man to stop farting

* I "want" Matt Lauer (from Today Show)

* I will punch that nurse in the face when she comes back in here

* I missed the G-D presidental debate. Why did he take so long? ( Was in surgery 7.5 hours that time)

Of course you don't ever remember but it's always funny.:lol2:

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Specializes in Telemetry/Cardiac Floor.

When I had an endoscopy, I was singing "show me the meaning of being lonely", by the backstreet boys,and asking everyone for ketchup, like 6 months later the CRNA saw me at the hospital credit union working, and started laughing at me, saying I remember you! I was so embarassed!

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Specializes in LTC, Home Health.

I was told by my doctor that as I was losing conciousness and they strapped my arms down I said "so, this is what Jesus felt like". He laughed and said that was the first he had heard that.

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Specializes in Telemetry, Case Management.

The first time I had surgery, I woke myself up by pulling my oxygen mask off and the strap snapped my face. Then I was straining and reaching for an alcohol swab on the table. The nurse asked me why I wanted it and I said, "To take this G-d d*m* IV out of my arm!"

I NEVER EVER EVER say GD!!!! I was horrified. :no:

I also told her I wanted a GD Coke in a can, and I wanted a Christmas Coke in a can, GD it!!!!! (This was in early January.) I did get the Christmas coke, but they wouldn't let me take out my own IV!!!

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Specializes in ICU, Research, Corrections.

I once heard a pt utter during a colonoscopy, "If you are going to **** me, at least kiss me!"

That one got a smile from everyone in the room. :lol2:

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this thread has given me a chuckle today..thanks.

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I once heard a pt utter during a colonoscopy, "If you are going to **** me, at least kiss me!"

That one got a smile from everyone in the room. :lol2:

I love it...

These are so funny!!

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Specializes in none.

They used to have a girl from the children's playroom come into procedures with me. On the way back from one of my cath's I asked her if she would marry me. The answer was yes, but only if I was older haha. I think it was my last open heart; once they put me on the OR table I started yelling "help help I'm falling off the table." It felt like the table had stood up and I was slliding off.

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Specializes in Cardiothoracic Transplant Telemetry.

What is interesting about this thread is that most of the stories are personal, rather than being relations of what patients have said.

I have never understood why on earth a healthcare provider would relay the words or actions of a patient while under the influence of sedation. Why embarrass someone with knowledge of actions over which they had no control? The only good reason to do this that I can think of is in instances where the patient becomes violent, or has a life threatening reaction to the sedation. In all other cases just leave the person alone. I know that often friends and family members will fill the patient in, and I think even that is unfortunate.

I recently underwent carpal tunnel surgery under sedation. I remember waking up a couple of times during the surgery, most notably as the surgeon announced that he was not able to get the visualization that he needed with the endoscope and was going to have to convert to an open procedure. I am not sure, but I think that I may have had a few choice words before I went back under. I clearly remember thinking OH ****!, and am fairly sure that I may have been loopy enough to blurt it out. No one said anything one way or the other after the surgery, and for that I am grateful.

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Right before I was put under I was discussing a parrot patient (I work in a vet hospital) that made sexual noises when it boarded with us. My friend told me later that they were quite realistic. I guess the CRNA was blushing pretty good and so was she. Most times peaople don't hear those noises or words from me.

Fuzzy

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Specializes in ICU, PICC Nurse, Nursing Supervisor.

i had surgery in april of 2007 and when i woke up the nurse ask me if i worked as a nurse and was looking for a new job or something... i said.."oh my goodness why", she told me that while i was out i started asking about the benefits and sign on bonuses ...lol:yeah:

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