There Is A Lot Of Fertilizer In Some Cardiac Patients

Well, this one gentleman with the post open heart was feeling nauseated and in pain as well and I medicated him but the nausea was not getting better. Doc on call "read resident" says do a whole cardiac profile on him so we did... drew some labs and waited.

This man was kinda confused as well and was a long time drinker and looking back on it he was probably having withdrawals but as a new nurse I did not have a lot of insight and experience but what happened next still makes me laugh to this day and I love to tell other nurses about it and for it to be a warning.

Well, I had done rounds and passed meds the first run for my stable patients of the night and went in to assess this gentleman and he commenced to coughing which I helpfully showed him how to splint with the heart pillow the hospital provided.

This patient started to become agitated and was coughing and then all of a sudden he vomited and I mean VOMITED all over me my hair my scrubs... It was like something out of the Exorcist and that really occurred to me as the patient after this outpouring of bodily fluids smiled at me most beatifically and hiccuped loudly and I said to him, "Do you feel better".

I calmly strode to the door and called to the NA working with me that night and said I think I need some towels in here ASAP. So here she comes and sees me all covered in vomit and has to race to the BR herself as she was a great NA but vomit smell always got to her. So here she is heaving and all of a sudden the vomiter in the room starts laughing holding his pillow to his sternal incision all the while...

She finally got me some towels and I went upstairs to the surgery suite and showered and got surgical scrubs. I even had to start laughing as I was leaving the room and walking down the hallway amid questioning looks and stares and some smirks I laughed right along with them and to the day the patient left the unit he would go by me and say he felt nauseated and then say just kidding but when he left he gave me a hug and said girl you are a true Okie when the going gets nasty most run but an Okie hangs in there... that made me really laugh as I was a transplant.... and as any nurse that gardens know that transplanted plants need fertilizer ... He HE He.....