The Fat One

[Pink86]

Do you find it inappropriate and unprofessional for a charge nurse to describe a student nurse as the fat one to her instructor? This happened the other day where I work, and I felt very bad because the student heard her and was upset about it. There was an incident on the floor and our charge was trying to blame the student for it, even though they weren't on the floor at the time.

I really don't understand why some nurses hate working with students. I've always found them helpful, especially when it comes to ADLs and answering call lights. Our charge was angry at the time, but I still feel that it was wrong for her to describe the student like that, and to report her to her instructor after both I and the student explained that she was off the floor at the time.

[imintrouble, BSN, RN]

Being called fat wouldn't bother me. It's as descriptive as saying I'm old, or gray, or wrinkled. I don't consider any of those offensive either.

I wouldn't use the term fat to describe someone else, as I recognize that it IS painful for some.

[No Stars In My Eyes]

My dog is nothing you could ever say to a human being and live to tell about it:

"You old fat, waddy thing."

"Tubby Tuba"

"Ya little fireplug."

"Vacuum-cleaner nose" (constantly searching for the hint of a smell of anything that might possibly be edible...which in her case is pretty much everything.)

"You Pitiful, Starved to Death Puppy! (She has heard ths one for the seven yeas we've had her. She equates being pitiful with getting FOOD. If you say "Are you pitiful?" she smiles and wags and agrees.

[KayGee]

Yeah because fat people don't know they're fat and need to be constantly reminded that they're too big to be acceptable. And we all know ALL fat people are super unhealthy. Note the sarcasm.

Also to the main post, I do feel it was a bit insensitive especially since the student was within earshot. Some fat people are okay with the word fat. It's not a bad word, really...but our culture has such a negative connotation tied to the word "fat" that I'd still consider it insensitive to use as a casual descriptor. Our culture has tied more things than just excess body fat to the adjective "fat". Because of this, it's still offensive to a lot of people.

[caroladybelle, BSN, RN]

I left a GA hospital, after 8 yrs service. I was well liked by many staff and float nurses, but had run afoul of some of the politics, and my manager.

I go to a conference with a number of my former colleagues. One said, she had not realized that I had left and asked about me on the floor but could not remember my name. She asked about the chubby one, the red headed nurse, one of the charge nurses on nights, the smart one, the one that wears the flowered, etc. one of my detractors turned around and said, "You mean Caroladybelle, the Jew?"

Never thought that was the best visual description.of me, but whatever.

[jadelpn, LPN, EMT-B]

If the student nurse was within earshot, perhaps a "excuse me, could you come here a moment? I have forgotten your name--" and then go on to discuss whatever from there.

Because if said student nurse then went back to her classmate group with a "that nurse apparently is suffering from dementia, haha" within earshot, I wonder if the instructor would call her out on that.

If someone is in earshot, talk to them, not around them. Derogatory remarks regarding someone's appearance is never professional, and mostly not tolerated. And dependent on the student, they could go back to the school (that by the way, she in fact PAYS for) could take it to the facility....there's any number of things that the nurse could do legally and locally.

It is just in poor taste, unprofessional, rude. Would feel the same way if negative descriptors were used for any student....and there are laws against that.

So when said nurse files a complaint against the clinical site, the school and the instructor is called on the carpet and the charge is as well....."I did call her fat" is probably not an adequate answer....

Same could be said about "skinny" as well--dependent on the cultures present on a unit, that also can be a derogatory remark.

[RNsRWe, ASN, RN]

Personally cannot WAIT until the pendulum swings the other way on the whole "racial identifying terms" thing. I grew up at a time when people were white, black, or hispanic. If they were a combination of any of them, the prevailing color was used.

At some time over the last couple of decades, it became "wrong" to say 'black'; suddenly everyone who used to be identified with that word were now "African American". Ummmm....NO.....not everyone who was black was indeed African....or even American! I resisted the urge to use the term, and continued to say "black".

Had a coworker comment to me that my use of the term was inappropriate, didn't I realize that "times have changed" and that "black is now considered a bigoted term". Seriously? Tell that to a friend of mine who is neither African OR American, but is most clearly BLACK! She's from the Carribean, and HATES the term "African American". Feels it invalidates her as a person. And then there's a former coworker of mine who is also NOT African, but IS American....and black. She cringes at 'African American' too.

Using the PC logic, I should be referred to exclusively as a European American. I am, after all, of European descent, am a native-born American, and....wait for it....am white. But wait! Don't people identify "white" as a racial term, when describing someone? As in "there were two white girls with the Hispanic guy". Hmmm.....

I guess what gets my knickers in a twist is that I am sometimes confused with a bigot because I use words and terms that I have been told (by the people to whom those words apply) are perfectly fine, perfectly appropriate, and perfectly accurate. Nothing derogatory. Bigots, I do believe, would use deogatory and inflammatory words whether or not the people to whom they apply appreciate them or find them acceptable.

There. I feel better now :)

[No Stars In My Eyes]

Whoopie Goldberg is also quite vocal about black people being called African-Americans. She says SHE is just plain AMERICAN, period.

Every time we turn around the Ultra-PC ground beneath us moves in another direction. Are we all supposed to throw ourselves on the ground in abject apology for simply existing?

[FlyingScot, RN]

I think I will insist on being called Celtic-American from this day forward. And that's a hard "c" in Celtic, thank you!

[No Stars In My Eyes]

I've got so many sources of heritage.....let's see, I would be a "Scanda-Euro-Celt-Nova-Sco-Canad-Cree-American!" Just a little bit unwieldy, I'd say.

[lovinglife2015]

Personally cannot WAIT until the pendulum swings the other way on the whole "racial identifying terms" thing. I grew up at a time when people were white, black, or hispanic. If they were a combination of any of them, the prevailing color was used.

At some time over the last couple of decades, it became "wrong" to say 'black'; suddenly everyone who used to be identified with that word were now "African American". Ummmm....NO.....not everyone who was black was indeed African....or even American! I resisted the urge to use the term, and continued to say "black".

Had a coworker comment to me that my use of the term was inappropriate, didn't I realize that "times have changed" and that "black is now considered a bigoted term". Seriously? Tell that to a friend of mine who is neither African OR American, but is most clearly BLACK! She's from the Carribean, and HATES the term "African American". Feels it invalidates her as a person. And then there's a former coworker of mine who is also NOT African, but IS American....and black. She cringes at 'African American' too.

Using the PC logic, I should be referred to exclusively as a European American. I am, after all, of European descent, am a native-born American, and....wait for it....am white. But wait! Don't people identify "white" as a racial term, when describing someone? As in "there were two white girls with the Hispanic guy". Hmmm.....

I guess what gets my knickers in a twist is that I am sometimes confused with a bigot because I use words and terms that I have been told (by the people to whom those words apply) are perfectly fine, perfectly appropriate, and perfectly accurate. Nothing derogatory. Bigots, I do believe, would use deogatory and inflammatory words whether or not the people to whom they apply appreciate them or find them acceptable.

There. I feel better now :)

As a black woman, let me help you out since you seem to be confused. Many American blacks use the term 'black' and 'African-American' interchangeably, so whomever told you that "black is now a bigoted term" was speaking out of their orifice.

The term African-American is a political identifier and was created(by black American political elites) in response to the Civil Rights Movement in an effort to define the African (American) descendants of slaves born in the United States. Unless it 'fits' the aforementioned qualifiers, there is no reason for any other group to be called African-American, unless you're using the term ignorantly. If your ancestors were not brought to the USA(from Africa) as slaves then the AA term doesn't apply to you(or your Caribbean friend --though black Caribbeans are also African slave descendants). As a result of the slave trade, the majority of black Americans have no knowledge of which countries in Africa we are descended, hence the general grouping as African-American.

I'm really not understanding why you have a problem accepting what other groups choose to call themselves? If you want to call yourself a "European-American," go for it. Start a petition if it interests you. Though most American whites have the luxury of knowing their genealogy and if they so choose can identify as Italian-American, Irish-American, German-American, etc...

[lovinglife2015]

Whoopie Goldberg is also quite vocal about black people being called African-Americans. She says SHE is just plain AMERICAN, period.

Every time we turn around the Ultra-PC ground beneath us moves in another direction. Are we all supposed to throw ourselves on the ground in abject apology for simply existing?

I don't think I've heard Whoopi speak on that topic quite as you've described, but even if you're accurate and that is her belief, Whoopi doesn't speak for all black people.

[No Stars In My Eyes]

I don't think I've heard Whoopi speak on that topic quite as you've described, but even if you're accurate and that is her belief, Whoopi doesn't speak for all black people.

I know Whoopie speaks only for herself; I wish I could remember the shows on which she has discussed it...well, 'discussed' isn't exactly the word I want.....maybe she vehemently proclaimed how much it pi$$ed her off to hear that term in relation to herself. (and yes, in just those words)