Terminated

[yournurse]

Hello guys,

I hope you guys can help me. A close friend of mine was terminated last month. After a week, her coworker from this facility asked my friend if she was ok because apparently the manager had told her coworker that she was fired.

Is this acceptable if it is within company? I think that is a personal matter that shouldn't have been discussed openly with other people.

Thanks guys. This has left my friend sad, depressed and angry. She doesn't know what to do. It seems like everyone knows that she got fired.

[JKL33]

If that's what was said, it wasn't very professional, obviously.

I assume your friend is as upset about the termination as she is about others possibly finding out about it. A coworker or two might have reached out to see if she was okay even if nothing had been said. The manager also could have said, "she no longer works here," and others would assume termination. And when nothing is said, everyone assumes termination. What I'm getting at is, although I've heard things phrased better (she's decided to move on, she is pursuing other opportunities, etc.) your friend's anger about this issue is a defense mechanism (sort of unhealthy attempt at coping, understandable as it may be). It's a major focus on a relatively minor side issue.

I get the adding-insult-to-injury aspect of what you're saying, but unless she is being slandered there is just nothing here. Even then, one would have to decide how much life to waste on dealing with it. I would probably encourage her to move forward, and regardless of anything else, this focus is not going to take her forward.

[yournurse]

Thank you, JKL.

I feel like it something that she should do as well. But spreading that someone got "fired" or "let go" some form of slander?

[Rose_Queen, BSN, MSN, RN]

7 minutes ago, indienurse said:

Thank you, JKL.

I feel like it something that she should do as well. But spreading that someone got "fired" or "let go" some form of slander?

Slander would require that what is said is untrue. Therefore, this would not meet the definition of slander. At best, it's unprofessional to state that someone was terminated. At worst, it may be a policy infraction on the part of the manager that would result in minimal (if any, the more likely scenario) disciplinary action.

[Persephone Paige, ADN]

It's not professional, but nurses do it all the time. And some of them love doing it.

You have a choice: wish the nurses would stop, or stop listening to what they say. I prefer the latter.

[yournurse]

Thanks Paige,

It's sad how people operate this way.

[TriciaJ, RN]

1 hour ago, indienurse said:

Thanks Paige,

It's sad how people operate this way.

It is sad, and it's even sadder when people get hung up on things like who said what to whom. I've known people who were devastated to have been terminated, then gone on to find a better job than the one they lost. Sometimes crappy events are gifts in disguise. Your friend needs to shrug this off and move on.

[Ruby Vee, BSN]

The manager may not have offered that your friend was fired. Sometimes, when someone is fired for cause the charge nurses are aware that it is going on because documentation is needed. Your friend is crossed off the schedule, and someone asks about it, and your manager said "They don't work here anymore." AHA! Everyone "knows" the person has been fired.

Or, "everyone knows" that that a person did something majorly wrong. I came to work one morning, and found the screen to the Pyxis was broken and we had to try and get our medications from the Pharmacy. I called the pharmacy, and the tech who answered said, "Oh, yeah. I heard that Tom got mad and punched out the screen on the Pyxis." Tom is taken off the schedule, and everyone is asked to work overtime tonight. So, everyone rushes to check the assignment sheet for tonight (are my friends working? Is it a good crew? Should I work some overtime? Tom is crossed off in the manager's handwriting). We all know that Tom did a destructive thing, Tom is off the schedule. Did Tom get fired? No one says yes or no, but the assistant manager MAY have microscopically nodded her head when we asked. That's all we need -- Tom got fired!

I would suggest that your friend has other priorities right now -- finding a new job perhaps. The previous job is gone. Rather than obsess about whether other people have done wrong things (gossiping about the termination) she should perhaps be focusing on why she was terminated and how she might avoid such a fate at her next job.

[Nurse SMS, MSN, RN]

Unprofessional certainly, if that is what really happened - but NOT a crime nor any cause for legal repercussions. Chances are you aren't getting the whole story. Encourage your friend to lift his/her chin and move on from this. The less you feed it the less it will live on...and it needs to die so that she or he can get past it.

[Nurse Beth, MSN]

Help your friend by refocusing. Acknowledge her pain but try to gently move her forward.