Taboo: 10 Things Nurses Should NEVER Say!

[Julie Reyes]

As nurses, we have learned the hard way to never say certain statements. Why? Well, that could be because the first time we said it - or heard it said - we got the "evil eye". Think back to the time you first heard some naive soul say, "WOW!, it sure is quiet today!" "Sure is slow", "Nothing has happened today", "We haven't had a code this week", and comments of the like - just are not acceptable!

If you are an experienced nurse (even with one day of experience), you will be able to testify to what will happen to the unfortunate employee who makes such a claim, right?! Let's just say that person is not the most popular person on the unit!

It is a fact. Some sayings are just taboo! What does that even mean? Taboo is, by definition, a social or religious custom prohibiting or forbidding discussion of a particular practice, or forbidding association with a particular person, place or thing. It is something that is prohibited or restricted by social custom.

We knock on wood if we say we have been having a good week, or we may reach out to touch the face of a beautiful child who is our patient so they don't have a turn for the worse. We cross ourselves and say a prayer when someone mentions the drug seeking patient (not currently a patient) who goes on a rampage when the doctor refuses to order the dilaudid. Therefore, speaking of such topics are prohibited!

So, what other topics is it that we as nurses don't want to hear? What is it that really grates on our nerves? Here are a few sayings...and the rationale behind it!

I interviewed some top notch nurses I know, and here is what they have to say on the subject:

1. Karen Martinez: "We're slow today." Why? It causes the floodgates to open wide and you will probably never get a potty break the rest of your shift!
2. Sylvia Nelson: "Our anesthesiologists have a thing against saying a child is calm, because then they wake up like a demon. I will never tell my surgeon I hope their night is quiet!"
3. Jennifer Collins: "It's been a good day!" That's when the *** hits the fan. Wait until your shift is over and you have given report!
4. Ashley Elizabeth: "I have a fantastic assignment!" - There is no such thing if you say it before the end of your shift....; "Calling a patient a 'stable vented patient'" will cause them to not be stable for long - you will be running a code in no time; "This patient is an easy stick." Your patient will suddenly become a turnip.
5. Cherrie Aquino: Telling parents, "Oh, he/she is the BEST IV starter!" Your patient will be a scientific marvel and have no veins.
6. Elissa Norris: "Don't ever mention the chronic kid (or adult patient) that has a crazy mom (or wife/husband/family member) - inevitably they show up!"
7. Carol Kaplan: "You should never, ever, repeat the name of a 'repeat offender' patient. You will admit that patient on your shift!"
8. Diana Montalvo: "The doctor will be in - just a few minutes." The doctor will not even be in the building...maybe not even in the country, since you said it!
9. Sarah Weishuhn: "As a surgical nurse, we never say, 'WOW!, there aren't any add on cases today?!' Because five minutes later, the bottom will fall out and we will have an open fracture, an appy, and a C-section...NOW!"
10. Sandra Cambridge: "Never comment on how well behaved a pediatric patient is until they are walking out the door." unless you wish to come face to face with the devil with the parent who has no control or expects you to be the nanny.

We learn to never say words like, 'quiet', 'boring', 'easy'. We never attribute these qualities to our patient(s), or the shift. We have learned, from having to jump in the trenches after these words are uttered, that these words will open up the gates of Hades and set forth a war that will cause you to have to wage battle against until your shift is "supposed" to be over.

We learn to bask in the warmth of silence or calmness that may befall our units without having to think about - much less comment about - the fact!

We never mention that we will be discharging all of our patients and request to leave when we have no more patients to care for....for good reasons! We know what will happen if we do. Not only will you be discharging all of your patients, but you will be the admitting nurse for all of the ones that ED will be sending up - because inevitably, some brickhead in the ED said, "Sure is quiet today!"

Taboo-10-Things-Nurses-Should-NEVER-Say.pdf

[PMHNP-1]

Horrible. Rather than encouraging this superstitious anti-science worldview, we should be fighting against it. Nurses who "feel" (thinking doesn't come into it at all) that these superstitions are "real" may also be the anti-vaxxers, the psych RNs telling patients they wouldn't need their meds if they'd just become "born again", or the nurses who say on any complicated topic that isn't intuitive, 'I've seen what the books say, but I just don't BELIEVE that". It isn't even really amusing to run around censoring valid comments about the environment. It is a throw-back to the Dark Ages

[PMHNP-1]

Hope it is all in fun, since that kind of behavior can also be the sign of an anti-science bias, or show the way to a group of nurses who cannot introduce new evidence-based practices into their work.

[PMHNP-1]

Actually, several validated retrospective studies show that full moons are NOT the worst. However - the behavior of nurses who "feel" (thinking not in evidence in this case) that this is true CAN affect the behavior of patients.

[PMHNP-1]

I wish it were meant to be fun. The fact that so many nurses have seen this behavior in their workplaces - and that many nurses are serious about it - means it isn't really "fun".

[Farawyn]

PMHNP-1 said:

Horrible. Rather than encouraging this superstitious anti-science worldview, we should be fighting against it. Nurses who "feel" (thinking doesn't come into it at all) that these superstitions are "real" may also be the anti-vaxxers, the psych RNs telling patients they wouldn't need their meds if they'd just become "born again", or the nurses who say on any complicated topic that isn't intuitive, 'I've seen what the books say, but I just don't BELIEVE that". It isn't even really amusing to run around censoring valid comments about the environment. It is a throw-back to the Dark Ages

Then again, maybe we aren't and are just having some fun.

Lighten up, Francis.

[firstclass]

We also don't use the q word on our unit too.

[SubSippi]

PMHNP-1 said:

Horrible. Rather than encouraging this superstitious anti-science worldview, we should be fighting against it. Nurses who "feel" (thinking doesn't come into it at all) that these superstitions are "real" may also be the anti-vaxxers, the psych RNs telling patients they wouldn't need their meds if they'd just become "born again", or the nurses who say on any complicated topic that isn't intuitive, 'I've seen what the books say, but I just don't BELIEVE that". It isn't even really amusing to run around censoring valid comments about the environment. It is a throw-back to the Dark Ages

I'm glad my lucky rock didn't hear you say that!

[Spidey's mom, ADN, BSN, RN]

Farawyn said:

Then again, maybe we aren't and are just having some fun.

Lighten up, Francis.

I dunno . . . . I was told to get off my high horse. ?

I've always prefaced my discussion about this subject when it has come up over the years with the idea that if people are just having fun, then fine.

But people actually believe this stuff. And get pretty huffy if you try to explain the scientific research studies that disprove it all.

Funny how just talking about the science of things gets you labeled

Quiet.

[Farawyn]

Quote

I dunno . . . . I was told to get off my high horse. ?

I've always prefaced my discussion about this subject when it has come up over the years with the idea that if people are just having fun, then fine.

But people actually believe this stuff. And get pretty huffy if you try to explain the scientific research studies that disprove it all.

Funny how just talking about the science of things gets you labeled

Quiet.

Not by me. I don't name call or take it seriously, but I also don't need someone standing over my shoulder asking me what I (we) *really* mean, and that she hopes I'm kidding, after I've said I was.

Presuming to know what others' think is a bit of magical thinking in itself, innit?

*drinks 3 cups of coffee, eats 3 egg whites and 3 strawberries to ward off the heebie jeebies*

[Spidey's mom, ADN, BSN, RN]

I let it go at work. Except, I said the word "quiet" every shift . . . . .

It is online that I link research about the myth of being able to make bad things happen by simply saying "quiet" or that the full moon has some kind of horrible power over people and their actions.

(Oh and the cholesterol in eggs has been found to not be that bad for us after all. Sheesh - but the price of eggs went up here locally!! $8.00 for a carton of eggs! Wish we still raised chickens for eggs.).

[Farawyn]

Quote

I let it go at work. Except, I said the word "quiet" every shift . . . . .

It is online that I link research about the myth of being able to make bad things happen by simply saying "quiet" or that the full moon has some kind of horrible power over people and their actions.

(Oh and the cholesterol in eggs has been found to not be that bad for us after all. Sheesh - but the price of eggs went up here locally!! $8.00 for a carton of eggs! Wish we still raised chickens for eggs.).

I usually do 1 whole egg and 2 whites, but I used a little poetic license. Oh, and I drink waaay more than 3 cups of coffee.

[SarahMaria, MSN, RN]

I have learned never to assume a patient's gender or relationship to a visitor.