Members are discussing the role of family members in providing medical information for hospitalized patients. Some members argue that spouses should be allowed to answer questions on behalf of the patient, while others emphasize the importance of obtaining information directly from the patient. The debate revolves around the balance between respecting the patient's autonomy and ensuring accurate medical history.
I'm not a nurse, but I'm hoping someone can clear something up for me.
I accompanied my husband to hospital several times over the past few weeks, and a couple of things have really puzzled and slightly annoyed me.
First off, we went to see a consultant, who had to examine my husband's abdomen. The consultant asked my husband to remove his shirt and lie on the bed, so my husband started taking his shirt off as he was walking to the bed. The consultant hurriedly ushered my husband towards the bed, and closed the curtain as if trying to protect my husband's privacy (from me - his wife?!). I found that a bit odd, especially as he only had to remove his shirt. Does he not think I've seen my husband's chest before?
Secondly, when my husband went into the same hospital for a procedure, the porter asked me to leave the room whilst they (four people including two females) transferred my husband from the trolley to the bed.
In both these situations it struck me as a little odd that a spouse would be asked to leave, and I felt a bit annoyed that the staff wanted to shield him from me, as if me being there would upset him somehow. When in fact he would feel no loss of dignity or privacy if I saw any part of his body at any time.
He is more comfortable with me seeing his body than anyone else in the world, especially female hospial staff. If he was going to suffer any loss of dignity, it would be from them seeing him, not me.
I should think that would be the case for most couples (except perhaps the odd vicar / nun combination).
Shouldn't the patient be asked?
All staff knew we were married, because he introduced me as his wife to all staff members who assisted him.
I realise I'm taking this way too personally, andpeople will think I'm getting upset over nothing. I've tried to put this out of my mind, but unfortunately it's not going anywhere, and I'm hoping someone can enlighten me as to the rationale behing asking spouses to leave in the situations described above. It might help me feel a bit better.
I don't want to ask the hospital, because they might think I'm neurotic and paranoid, which I am due to a couple of mental health conditions.
And I am highly suspicious of people who think that it is appropriate. I won't do it. There is a chaperone of course. I have to speak frankly to the patient, and I can't be sure we are having an honest dialog if she has a reason to lie standing right there, lol.
If the patient feels strongly about it, they find someone else and everyone is happy. No biggie.
And I am highly suspicious of people who think that it is appropriate. I won't do it. There is a chaperone of course. I have to speak frankly to the patient, and I can't be sure we are having an honest dialog if she has a reason to lie standing right there, LOL.
If the patient feels strongly about it, they find someone else and everyone is happy. No biggie.
I can understand this. My supervisor was just telling us about her time in Endo (she is the supervisor of Endo and my unit) as a patient. She chastised the Anesthesiologist for asking about her history in front of her family. There was something in her past that she did not want made public so she lied until she went into the OR and clarified it, I was given the impression it concerned her sexual history. I can fully understand that you would want privacy for the procedure because in reality, there are important things that we all want to keep secret from our families.
Specializes in OR, Nursing Professional Development.
BlueDevil,DNP said:
And I am highly suspicious of people who think that it is appropriate. I won't do it. There is a chaperone of course. I have to speak frankly to the patient, and I can't be sure we are having an honest dialog if she has a reason to lie standing right there, LOL.
If the patient feels strongly about it, they find someone else and everyone is happy. No biggie.
There is nothing wrong with asking someone to step out for a brief time, but let the patient determine that time. The exam itself may be the patient's most vulnerable moment and the one where they need support the most. An interview where the patient is fully clothed and less vulnerable is a better time for honest dialog while the support person has stepped out. I can tell you that asking me questions while I'm naked with my feet in stirrups is NOT the time to get answers, not because I'm lying, but because I am feeling vulnerable and things that I may have wanted to discuss may have been chased out of my mind because of those feelings.
If I had a practice that accommodated that it might work. As it is, I do the whole thing at once. There is no "interview session" with the patient clothed. I interview them while I examine them. Start to finish, I've got a 15 minute time limit.
Specializes in OR, Nursing Professional Development.
BlueDevil,DNP said:
If I had a practice that accommodated that it might work. As it is, I do the whole thing at once. There is no "interview session" with the patient clothed. I interview them while I examine them. Start to finish, I've got a 15 minute time limit.
And that is one of the main problems with health care today: quantity (AKA money) over quality.
Thank goodness I will never be seeking your care, Blue Devil!
I can certainly understand, in some cases, where the spouse would hinder your care, but I am honestly not bothered by family presence (as long as the patient consents). I also don't mind family in the room during a code, within reason of course, not like 50 extra people or anything. And from reading the comments here, apparently I'm in the minority. That's fine.
Thank goodness I will never be seeking your care, Blue Devil!
I can certainly understand, in some cases, where the spouse would hinder your care, but I am honestly not bothered by family presence (as long as the patient consents). I also don't mind family in the room during a code, within reason of course, not like 50 extra people or anything. And from reading the comments here, apparently I'm in the minority. That's fine.
After a couple of comments, you have decided you would be grateful that you would never seek this persons care? I think that was a bit harsh.
As for having a family member in the room during a code...there is was particular cardiac arrest who came to our ER recently. Apparently security did not stop the family member and no one noticed her slip into the room during the code. Well the family member suddenly shriek and then threw herself onto the pt right during the middle of it all (amongst other things, knocking the person doing compressions out of the way). Really, family does not belong there...sorry.
Maybe it's harsh, I don't care. I am thankful that I will never seek her care. She is not interested in what I need as a patient and invited anyone who disagrees to seek care elsewhere.
As for family not belonging in a code... How did that impact care? Were compressions delayed for an extended period of time? Was anyone hurt?
and invited anyone who disagrees to seek care elsewhere.
Yes, exactly! And this is handled 99.8% of the time without fanfare or angst. I have certain standards. I simply tell people how I work and let them decide for themselves. There has never been any hostility on this point, LOL. If the patient isn't comfortable with my approach, they look for someone who better meets their perceived need. It doesn't make any difference to me at all.
BlueDevil,DNP, DNP, RN
1,158 Posts
And I am highly suspicious of people who think that it is appropriate. I won't do it. There is a chaperone of course. I have to speak frankly to the patient, and I can't be sure we are having an honest dialog if she has a reason to lie standing right there, lol.
If the patient feels strongly about it, they find someone else and everyone is happy. No biggie.