A tough, difficult weekend in OB for me.....we had a 23-week lady (hx infertility x6 years) come in with "just a few cramps and pink tinged mucus" for evaluation. She was smiling, and very very upbeat. Not for long.....u OB nurses can guess what happens next.......
Upshot, telescoping membranes, 3cm cervix, perfect fetal strip, however..... put into trendelenburg, indocin, magnesium, you-name-it to TRY and save the pregnancy, but of course, it failed. Water broke after 6 hours of all this stuff and naturally the poor family begged us to "do everything"......what could we do? 23 weeks is just too soon..........they then revised their wishes to "comfort measures"....which was done.
The baby was born mid-day, initial apgar, 5 and then died. HOW SAD.....It brought back all my sadness of all my losses (4 in 2 years recently). I did ok with them, I really was strong, but spent the weekend in tears once my shifts were over.........still so emotionally overwrought and tired.....and just plain ragged. Just needed to vent. Nothing anyone could do for that family and nothing anyone can do for me either. I guess my miscarriages/losses are still bothering me a great deal. More than I want to admit even to myself. When will I just get on with it????? :angryfire
Sometimes I wonder if I will ever feel whole again. Sometimes I wonder what I am doing in OB. It's such a "happy" place to work.....til crap like this happens to good people...oh and this is the 3rd 23/24 week loss in 2 weeks. This sucks.
Thank you for listening. I am getting all worked up again ugh. :uhoh21:
