Published May 16, 2009
Do any of your facilities allow spouses/children of residents to sleep over??? I don't mean for one night if the resident is going to die. I mean because they want to. Mind you this particular person who wanted to sleep over lives less than 30 minutes from the facility. It seems with every passing year, residents and their families expect us to be more like the Hilton and less like the MEDICAL facilities we are.
I haven't heard of this in facilities. It doesn't seem like a good idea unless the resident is gravely ill. Frankly it is bad enough to have visitors underfoot during regular visiting hours, 24/7 would just be a bad situation. There would be those who would be there for reasons other than an innocent visit to their own family member.
My point precisely. I can almost guarantee by Monday that some busy body from town will have written, emailed, or called the corporate CEO to tell him that I am the embodiment of evil for not allowing the 'poor little old man to stay with his wife.'
I am coming from no experience in long term care except for my first clinical in school, and have no experience as a RN, as I just graduated. From my POV it definitely is inconvenient for family members to stay over, but some of my favorite times when I was little was sleeping over my grandparents house. If this was not possible because my grandparents were in a facility I would have missed out on a ton. Maybe the facility could allow the child to stay once in a blue moon if rules were established and the family didn't take advantage of it. I could be wrong though as I don't have experience- it's just a shame that grandparents and grandkids miss out on so many great memories when in LTC, BUT I totally understand that is is not the RNs responsibility to babysit!
I don't mean little kids. That would be out of the question all together! Visits during the day are great. Take grandma home for the day, but staying over is ridiculous. We are NOT a motel.
CoffeeRTC, BSN, RN
Nope...not unless they are gravely ill or are having behaviors and need a sitter type of thing do families stay over. We only have a few private rooms and the rest are semi....so you get into the privacy issues.
That's the craziest thing I've ever heard of...now if , as others have said, the person is gravely ill, or the weather is bad...but routinely?????Ugh.....if your resident is able to "entertain" company for the night, I suggest the hotel down the street...
Terrible precedent to set, I've never heard of it, its disruptive to the other patients etc,
We have had family ask to sleep over and we arranged a room for pay for them since we had an extra room anyway and he was willing to pay for it ...but that was an extreme situation.
We once had a homeless daughter try to sleep on the floor next to her fathers bed, the SW called the police and removed her, the next day a court order was given that she had to be out by 9:30 pm
Similar problem, we have had pts taking PT equipment home with them, all sorts of stuff even a wheel chair when we called to get it back, we got all sorts of nasty answers,
People think they can abuse us because we are supposed to be nice and all that.
I worked in one facility that allowed this, but only for hospice patients. All their hospice rooms were private rooms with the patient's bed in the room and a futon or day bed. One lady we had was in her 30's and dying of liver cancer. Her teenaged son stayed all the time on the futon in her room. I never considered it "babysitting"; he was devastated by her diagnosis and just wanted to be with her as long as he could. She died after about a month and he was able to be there by her side when she passed (she went peacefully in her sleep).
Just my experience...
At an LTC facility I worked at, a woman was allowed to move a huge recliner into her husband's room. She stayed almost 24/7, only going home to shower sometimes and check on their house. This went on for about EIGHT MONTHS! He usually had a room mate. As her husband ate very little, she ordered jello to be sent up on his trays. He got the jello, she got the meal. He was total care, and at first she helped with his care. Soon though, she just watched and was always underfoot. After a few months, she started cracking on the staff to other family members. When he got an order for morphine subq every hour, she expected it to be exactly one hour, and the heck with all the other patients. She insisted he get it, even when he said he didn't need it. If you were late, she came out in the hall looking for you and gritching loudly. The facility should never have allowed this to happen, but they are very much into butt-kissing and making money. Sad to say, it was a relief to be free of her when he finally passed away.
evilolive, BSN, RN
We have one new resident in my building whose daughter stayed overnight the first night to "help ease ma." I am unsure of the policy in my building, regarding sleepovers, but for the most part, they were okay. Except when "ma" would wake up with nightmares then start talking to her daughter... "ma" is HOH and legally blind, and they talk SO loud. I went in, talked in a regular tone close to her, and was fine.
Some families.... I do understand making exceptions for sickly or dying family members, but come on! I just felt like saying "stop being a DURRRRRRRRRRRRR" to the daughter, lol.
There is the legal question also. Everyone that is working in LTC or hospital has to have a background check. Where as we know nothing about the backgrounds of these people that sleep over. We have had problems during the day with visitors that roam through the hospital stealing purses and stuff out of patients rooms. God knows what would go on if they were there at night.
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