Shy new grad at work

ShiphrahPuah · May 20, 2010

Don't put yourself down because you are naturally an introvert...lots of people are. Pay attention to who is most helpful at work. Watch how the other nurses interact. Be sure to ask questions when you need help. You will discover who is worth asking and who to bypass unless it's an absolute emergency. It's hard because we all want everyone to like us, but there are other nurses you will find you want to be friends with and others that a cooperative working relationship is about all you can hope for from them (and sometimes you don't even get that). You don't have to change yourself to try to make people like you. Don't take the name "saint" as a negative, even if the person who said it meant it to have a negative connotation. They may see you as a goody-two-shoes (been there), but in the long run you will have the reputation as someone who is dependable, hardworking, compassionate, kind, and who doesn't talk behind other people's backs. At first you may really want to fit in, but stay true to yourself because nursing needs people like you. Yes, there are times when being assertive is important, but sometimes I have witnessed behavior from other nurses that for me goes beyond being assertive to just plain aggressive (and sometimes the situation warrants it and I am glad they are there in those cases). I tend to be patient and winsome and kind, and there is a place for me too. I am usually very effective in calming a patient who is very upset, supporting someone who is afraid, listening when the patient really needs to talk, and taking the time to explain the same thing over and over again because they still don't really get it. Other nurses may be better than you at putting a doctor in his place for being rude or dealing with a family member that is pushing at certain boundaries meant for safety, but I think having a wide range of personalities on the floor makes the whole unit stronger. The first year of nursing is tough, but give yourself time to adjust. You can do this!

Sparrow23 · May 20, 2010

Extremely shy myself. Even when I am not feeling shy, people still think I am... Don't let it bother you. If you are like me, then doing a good job, being there for your patients and keeping them safe are the most important things to you when you are at work, so focus on that and you'll be just fine. People at work know that I am shy, but they also know that I am caring and want to do a good job. I am finding that the more I learn, the more confident I become and the better I can advocate for both my patients and myself. Hopefully it will be the same for you. Find an experienced nurse there who you can trust and who can act as a mentor whenever you have questions, no matter how silly (I thank god for one nurse I work with; she is an incredible nurse/teacher/person and has made being a new nurse sooo much easier). Just remember, it's about the patients, and providing good care. Besides, being shy isn't all that bad... keeps us out of all the crazy office politics... also makes us good listeners which I know the patients appreciate :) Good luck!

Penelope_Pitstop, BSN, RN · May 21, 2010

You all would be surprised to hear this, but I am an introvert. I've been on vacation all week, and I've spent most of it in my room with books and the computer. Not because I'm depressed or anything, but because I needed a vacation from PEOPLE! It's another reason why nights is perfect for me. Not a bunch of chattering and yammering going on.

However, my natural personality gave me the "stuck up" reputation. I had to overcome that if I wanted to have teamwork happen! This is what I did. It might not work for you, but it did for me - I sort of played pretend. When the scrubs go on, I become SuperNurse! Just like Batman is still Bruce Wayne, SuperNurse is still...well, me. However, I have these superpowers! SuperAdvocacy! SuperAssessment! SuperDocumentation! SuperDelegation! Da na na na! And SuperNurse can't be shy...if she is, the bad guys might just win. The thing is, though, I had to psych myself up and convince myself that I had this alter ego. Eventually, it became habit. Of course, SuperNurse gets tired of being around people and saving butts so she needs to retreat to the NurseCave and just wind down, be herself. She comes to Camaro Manor and takes of the scrubs and is her old self again.

Laugh at me. Go ahead, laugh.

But my car DOES look like the Batmobile.

carebearsRN · May 21, 2010

You all would be surprised to hear this, but I am an introvert. I've been on vacation all week, and I've spent most of it in my room with books and the computer. Not because I'm depressed or anything, but because I needed a vacation from PEOPLE! It's another reason why nights is perfect for me. Not a bunch of chattering and yammering going on.
However, my natural personality gave me the "stuck up" reputation. I had to overcome that if I wanted to have teamwork happen! This is what I did. It might not work for you, but it did for me - I sort of played pretend. When the scrubs go on, I become SuperNurse! Just like Batman is still Bruce Wayne, SuperNurse is still...well, me. However, I have these superpowers! SuperAdvocacy! SuperAssessment! SuperDocumentation! SuperDelegation! Da na na na! And SuperNurse can't be shy...if she is, the bad guys might just win. The thing is, though, I had to psych myself up and convince myself that I had this alter ego. Eventually, it became habit. Of course, SuperNurse gets tired of being around people and saving butts so she needs to retreat to the NurseCave and just wind down, be herself. She comes to Camaro Manor and takes of the scrubs and is her old self again.
Laugh at me. Go ahead, laugh.
But my car DOES look like the Batmobile.

omg you are too funny this post brought a smile to my face. I'm shy too but for some reason I'm not around my patients b/c I want to get my job done. More experience and confidence will help you become more assertive eventually =)

cb_rn · May 21, 2010

You all would be surprised to hear this, but I am an introvert. I've been on vacation all week, and I've spent most of it in my room with books and the computer. Not because I'm depressed or anything, but because I needed a vacation from PEOPLE! It's another reason why nights is perfect for me. Not a bunch of chattering and yammering going on.

I need to work nights with you --- everyone here drinks energy drinks and gets hopped up about 0300 and is loud and chatty and all I want to do is throw a chart at them sometimes! Ok not really, but I like some quiet time to think. I have this CNA and I love her to death but sometimes I have to say "Enough!" So she goes off and giggles with some of the other nurses that are more cheerful in the wee hours of the morning. I barely do nights anymore, it was just too much talk non stop.

Penelope_Pitstop, BSN, RN · May 21, 2010

I need to work nights with you --- everyone here drinks energy drinks and gets hopped up about 0300 and is loud and chatty and all I want to do is throw a chart at them sometimes! Ok not really, but I like some quiet time to think. I have this CNA and I love her to death but sometimes I have to say "Enough!" So she goes off and giggles with some of the other nurses that are more cheerful in the wee hours of the morning. I barely do nights anymore, it was just too much talk non stop.

My best friend at work NEVER SHUTS UP. I love her dearly but oh my goodness sometimes I want to give her some Ativan or something. Whereas the rest of us tend to go about our business.

Although if it's my third twelve in a row...it never fails, at 0330 I go nuts and just start giggling for absolutely no reason. Punch-drunk, I guess you'd call it.

But sure, come here, we'd love to have ya!

krissy_mack · May 21, 2010

first of all you do not have to have a tough personality to be great at your job. first of all your personality is a good fit for the firld that you are in. second you need to realize that EVERYBODY that you will be working with is a person just like you!!!! all the people that you work with eat, sleep and poop just like you! NEVER change who you are especially to have a tougher personality! im not saying be a push over but understand that you are a smart beautiful hard working nurse for a reason so go out there and do your job that you worked so hard to be!!!!! remember: we are all people and i can guarantee more than half of the people that you work with who put uo a "tough exterior" is soft as pie deep down and are hiding who they really are. AT LEAST YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE AND NEVER CHANGE THAT!!!! DO YOUR JOB! THATS WHY YOU ARE THERE!!!

:nurse: :redbeathe:yeah:

D_Nichole205 · May 21, 2010

I am a shy/nervous type of person myself. One of my classmates and even a clinical instructor asked me "How are you gonna be a nurse and you're shy?". Well, I always got my job done, and the patients seemed to really like me during clinicals.

I just don't really care what people think of me because they are ALWAYS going to think SOMETHING! I think as long as you are doing your job and doing it right, that's the most important thing.

Just be yourself.

TDCHIM · May 21, 2010

You all would be surprised to hear this, but I am an introvert. I've been on vacation all week, and I've spent most of it in my room with books and the computer. Not because I'm depressed or anything, but because I needed a vacation from PEOPLE! It's another reason why nights is perfect for me. Not a bunch of chattering and yammering going on.
However, my natural personality gave me the "stuck up" reputation. I had to overcome that if I wanted to have teamwork happen! This is what I did. It might not work for you, but it did for me - I sort of played pretend. When the scrubs go on, I become SuperNurse! Just like Batman is still Bruce Wayne, SuperNurse is still...well, me. However, I have these superpowers! SuperAdvocacy! SuperAssessment! SuperDocumentation! SuperDelegation! Da na na na! And SuperNurse can't be shy...if she is, the bad guys might just win. The thing is, though, I had to psych myself up and convince myself that I had this alter ego. Eventually, it became habit. Of course, SuperNurse gets tired of being around people and saving butts so she needs to retreat to the NurseCave and just wind down, be herself. She comes to Camaro Manor and takes of the scrubs and is her old self again.
Laugh at me. Go ahead, laugh.
But my car DOES look like the Batmobile.

I loved this response. Absolutely, completely, totally loved it. Yes, I laughed a lot over it, but I completely know what you mean; I had to do something fairly similar in order to be brash enough to take people on while interviewing them for stories, especially if they were trying to blow smoke up my bum.

OP, I don't know if this way will work for you; it's certainly worth a shot. I completely agree with the first poster; diversity in personalities helps your department or unit, especially if you all recognize your strengths and weaknesses and work as a team. In any case, capitalize on your strengths and do your best to psych yourself up when tackling a weak spot situation. Learning from others is important too. In any workplace setting, you'll see plenty of examples of good and awful ways to handle different types of situations, so do your best to take away good lessons from each experience.

Best of luck from another decided introvert. You can do this!

AndieWoke · May 21, 2010

i am an older grad, past *gulp* 40, on my first rn job, and i am also really introverted and shy. i agree with just being yourself, asking lots of questions, doing the best job you can (your're new, you're going to goof up), and be professional (at the minimum) to your co-workers. it's hard sometimes, but it's also a new job too, so cut yourself a break when things feel uncomfortable or don't go as well as you think they should. and realize that not everyone is going to like you and that's ok too, maybe you shouldn't like them . . . just because someone is really popular with everyone on the floor doesn't mean that their patients like them or that they do a good job.

i've been at my current job just a few months and i have finally found a few people that i can count on for advice and help and have also figured out who to avoid. i'm still not comfortable, but i'm working on it. you'll get there too, come back here when you need a boost! i know i do.

best, andie

hunnybaby24, BSN, APRN, NP · May 21, 2010

I totally love all of yall! I am an introvert by nature too, but I act extroverted at work to get the job done. Sometimes I feel intimidated when I go to patient rooms, and stutter or mumble, but I always learn to speak up because the patient may be HOH! haha. Anyway, we all have a place in nursing. Its nice to "meet" all of you because it sometimes feels like we are the minority. :) and I work night shift too! have a great day everyone!