Sex and Nursing School

[motyandproudofit]

Has your sex life dwindled since beginning Nursing School. My husband says he is stressed out with work. We have a great relationship, rarely argue, hold hands plenty but no sex. I really think that me studying all the time is the problem, like the lack of time we used to have. Once I am done studying I am totally ready to go but he just wants to go to bed (to sleep). Anytbody else have a similar problem?

[myrose]

Sex? I do not even know what that is anymore...

[psalm, RN]

Sex? I do not even know what that is anymore...

It's whether you're a boy or a girl

[Skeletor]

:) Biology is a wonderful thing.

So is religion. You have your beliefs and I have mine. Have a good day.

[motyandproudofit]

I have talked to him the best I can. He really doesn't like to address it because he is embarrassed and I guess upset with himself, feeling inadequate. It is not like we went from once a week to now only once every 2 weeks. No. We went from like every other day to once this whole summer semester. He had mentioned once before about going to the doctor to have his testosterone checked because he just doesn't have the drive. I had set up an appointment but something came up that he had to cancel. He has not been to the doctor in about 5 years. He avoids the doctor. I have an appointment set up for Tuesday for him for a regular checkup and he is to talk to the doctor about sex drive. It will be difficult for him I know, but we'll see what happens. I don't think my studying is the only factor but I was feeling so resposible and was trying to make sense out of the situation.

[ErinJane]

I thought for a second that people were offended by the discussion of sex, but I can see how someone would be offended by the generalization or implication that all men cheat.

Yes biology says that men have an innate desire to "spread their seed" but this desire is controlled by the amygdala, which is held in check by the frontal lobe. Men are rational and some have a more active frontal lobe than others. They have the ability to keep that desire in check.

Plus, women cheat. Women like sex too. It's a moral decision for both sexes.

I do respect your views, but I disagree with your conclusion.

[AtomicWoman]

I have talked to him the best I can. He really doesn't like to address it because he is embarrassed and I guess upset with himself, feeling inadequate. It is not like we went from once a week to now only once every 2 weeks. No. We went from like every other day to once this whole summer semester. He had mentioned once before about going to the doctor to have his testosterone checked because he just doesn't have the drive. I had set up an appointment but something came up that he had to cancel. He has not been to the doctor in about 5 years. He avoids the doctor. I have an appointment set up for Tuesday for him for a regular checkup and he is to talk to the doctor about sex drive. It will be difficult for him I know, but we'll see what happens. I don't think my studying is the only factor but I was feeling so resposible and was trying to make sense out of the situation.

I hope his doctor can make him feel comfortable about the subject, or at least refer him to a specialist. I work in a speciality urology office where people with sexual dysfunctions of all kinds are treated and HELPED. Each patient's problem is taken absolutely seriously and every effort is made to help him OR her have a more satisfying sex life. If his doctor shows any signs of hemming and hawing, or just claps him on the back and says, "Well, that's what happens when you (get older, are under stress, fill in the blank)", ask for a referral or find another doctor yourself. Your husband may feel embarrassed, but I can assure him there is NOTHING he can say that a doctor, NP, PA, etc. experienced in this field hasn't heard before!

You are to be commended for your desire to deal with this issue straight-on.

[Desert Medic]

Think GRAYS ANATOMY...

[AOx1]

It's interesting to me that during times of stress, we tend to neglect the things that matter most and can bring us the most stress relief! I understand stress quite well, but we don't stop showering, brushing our teeth, etc during stressful times. Why then do we forego other essentials such as proper nutrition, exercise and a healthy sex life?

OP, I do hope things work out well and that you can find the cause of this. It's such an important part of life.

[Aongroup1990, CNA]

sex is important. and personal for a couple. it is needed in a relationships. its ok to spice things up once in a while..

[brillohead, ADN, RN]

Do we even want to know exactly what search term was used to bring up this particular 4yo thread? LOL

[lifelearningrn, BSN, RN]

People do cheat. But cheaters cheat because of something broke within themselves, not because their partner wasn't 'taking care' of them. You either have enough morals and communication abilities to discuss your frustration with your spouse, or you blame the lack of sex (essentially blaming your spouse) to justify breaking your vows.

Sorry- but it almost sounds like people here are justifying a spouse cheating because time and stress will make a sex life take a back seat.

Definitely try to get some together time with the hubby... but expect a decline for the time being.