RNs- Mostly first born? Alcoholic fathers?

[Hellllllo Nurse]

KristyBRN's thread on this topic is very interesting. She has heard that many RNs are first borns of alcoholic fathers. I thought we could use a quantitative poll on the subject.- *Please add any comment you wish, i.e. tell us if you are an only or first born.

Please choose the option that best describes you-

[Valerie Salva, BSN, RN]

Oldest child of alcoholic father.

I think maybe women with such parents may be motivated by wanting to make things right, and to gain feelings of self esteem and empowerment by becoming nurses, but we don't realize that nursing often does not provide these things.

Just guessing here.

[KaroSnowQueen, RN]

Oldest child, mother crazy and alcoholic. Father crazy but his didnt' surface til I was an adult. Read the book "Adult Children of Alcoholics" by Janet Woj-i-something when I was 35 and the bells went off!!! Out of 13 characteristics, I had 12!!!!!!!

[GrumpyRN63, ADN, RN]

Youngest child, alcoholic father, now crazy and estranged- pickled his brain I guess, Mother not alcoholic, growing up controlling, emotionally cold/distant- pretty good relationship now

[AmericanRN]

wow this thread caught my eye, and I'm fascinated. I am not yet an RN, won't graduate until next year so I didn't answer the poll, But I am the first born and a daughter of an alcoholic father. What is it I wonder that attracts people like me to nursing?

Great research topic!

This is fascinating. I never thought about it, I am the first born for my mother and father (father is dead now) I am the child of recovering alcoholics and addicts. My step father is also a recovering addict, my biological father died from complications of drug abuse when I was an infant.

I start clinicals in April. I have wanted to be a nurse my whole life but jst delayed it thinking I couldn't do it. Maybe we want to take care of people but we want some structure behind it and not just be used to death like what we are used too. (hahahah) I also wonder if living around dramatic drunken people made many nurses and soon to be bookworms who will read everything. Or do we desire the technical end of learning because there is a structure in it and a results (might not be what we want but there is always a result in learning or doing a procedure) Living with addicts or alcoholics is predictably unpredictable. That in itself can be dull after a life of it.

I don't know but it is a good research topic, wish I had thought about it when I was taking Advanced Argumentative Research.

[chuckc, BSN, RN]

I am 3rd of three girls. Mother is a seemingly charming woman who has narcissistic/histrionic/sociopathic personality disorders. Father is cold/distant alcoholic. I have washed my hands of these two. Boy, do I have issues, LOL.

[nyapa, RN]

I have listed myself as being first born child of an alcoholic father, even though he was my stepfather. I have never met my biological father, and not sure if I want to...thats another story. But I lived with this man for 8 years, and watched the physical and psychological terror he put my mother through. So I think I do come in that category, as I did not know until I was ten that he was not my father...I'm glad he isn't

[ga_peach_babi]

I'm don't fit the RN, but I'm currently in school for LPN. But I'm first born of an alcoholic father. He died when I was 14, (I'm 19 now.)

[grace90, LPN, LVN]

youngest of 5 kids, next one closest to me was 5+ yrs older, neither parent alcoholic but mom was/is mentally ill and turned a blind eye to abuse outside the family and at times facilitated it

[racing-mom4, BSN, RN]

Oh, yeah, that dark, dark horrible path. All alone with a madwoman, and as a child what can you do? :sofahider

In my teens, I took myself off to a psychiatrist, thinking everything must be my fault, like mom said, but confused, not feeling it really was.

M.D. spoke with my mom, then told me "You don't need to come back to see me. You're not crazy, but your mother is and the best advice I can give you is to get as far away from her, as fast as you can, and never look back."

We must have went to the same therapist---I swear I got the same advice...FYI I was looking for the First born father alcoholics and mother narcissistic.

I am amazed at the poll so far, very very interesting topic. One I want to share.

[EmmaG, RN]

I voted both non-alcoholic, but I guess I should have voted 'other'. They both had issues that I believe led to a measure of co-dependency in me.

Excluding the 'other' category, 55.5% polled had alcoholic parents.

A psychiatrist told me years ago that co-dependency is rampant in nursing. I don't know if that was simply his personal opinion and observation or if he actually had research to back it up. Given that he wasn't prone to flip comments, I kinda suspect the latter.

[slevin]

I agree. This would be a very good idea to make this a survey. Any ideas on how to make it a survey?

[jessiern, BSN, RN]

1st born to a wonderful, strong woman married at the time to my biological "sperm donor" father, an alchoholic with many other drug problems (he was a 'ho-dog' too ). They divorced when I was 8, and my step dad adopted me when I was 12, and life has been peaches and cream since.