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Reference from current manager..what to do??

Posted

Specializes in LDRP.

I work at a hospital, have worked on my current unit for a little over 3 years. My manager is a nice lady, i've not had any problems with her. As i work nights, I dont see her too much.

I applied for another job a few months ago, outside of the hospital organization. Interviewed. Was told I was one of top candidates, and therefore, they wanted to speak to current manager. I emailed current manager and told her about applying for new job, that it was related to needing more daytime with no nights/weekends/holidays schedule and nothing to do with current unit. That I enjoyed working for her. That interviewer would be contacting her for a reference. She replied that she understood. Next week, interviewer said she hadn't heard back from current manager. So i emailed current manager and gave her a phone number to call interivewer at. she responded that she would. week after that, interviewer called me and said she still hadn't heard from current manager. dont know what happened after that, b/c interviewer never called me back and the position is re-posted online:crying2:. but when i had my annual review, my current manager asked if i ever heard anything back from interviewer. never indicated if she ever called interviewer.

so, then i applied for PRN job taht wouldn't interfere with hospital job at all. That job called current manager for reference, and she never called her back either. This job hired me anyways, using other references. Though this is a great job, its just PRN, nothing guaranteed at all, and not a replacement for full time work, which is what i want.

so, I applied for another job. interviewed. it went well. she contacted one of my work references, who said good things about me. I had 2 other work references that she did not call. She wants to contact current manager now. So she called current manager yesterday and when i talked to interviewer today, she said current manager hadn't called her back!!!! So she's expecting she might hear from her on Monday.

I'm afriad interviewer won't hear from current manager. That she won't call this one back, either. I dont want to lose this great job b/c of my manager not wanting to give a reference/not calling back. Our current job doesn't have any positions posted-so its not like we are crazy short staffed. I'm not a horrible employee, but im not the best one either. I "met standards" on my evaluation. I dont call in a lot/steal drugs/break protocol.

So what do I do? Im afraid if I do nothing, current manager won't call back and I wont get job. I know she's not obligated to give reference...but interviewer isn't obligated to give me the job without the reference!!

Do I email current manager, sweet talk her and ask for reference? (not ask her to lie but just ask her to talk to interviewer!!) or do I wait, and if interviewer hasn't heard from current manager by monday (3 business days since she called her) ask interviewer to consider other references instead?

arrrggghhh!!! i do not want to lose this potential job!!! what do I do ?

ghillbert, MSN, NP

Specializes in CTICU. Has 20 years experience.

Ask your manager to let you know honestly if she's not willing to give you the reference. If she is, ask her availability and have the new company call her at that time. I don't think it's her responsibility to call them.

Otherwise, find another referee. A preceptor, maybe?

FLArn

Specializes in Hospice, LTC, Rehab, Home Health. Has 20 years experience.

I would check with the interviewer to see if the manager has called. If not, I would say that the manager has failed to call other interviewers for potential jobs, that you are unsure as to why that is and what other references (HR, coworkers, etc) might be acceptable in place of the manager's since you are very interested in the job. It won't necessarily get you the job, but you didn't get the other job by staying quiet either.

I wish you the very best in your future.

MAISY, RN-ER, BSN, RN

Specializes in ER/EHR Trainer. Has 6 years experience.

I am not sure how your current manager not calling back is impacting poorly on you....it is very unprofessional for them to behave in this manner. I would let this current interviewer know this has been your manager's MO and advise her she may not call back. Have this person call personnel and get the generalities required. It is not mandatory that someone speak to your manager; normally if you were looking for other work they would not have that option!

Consider using your charge nurse, doctors, residents and other disciplines as references.

Good Luck,

Maisy

PS She sounds kooky.

I'm thinking that by not calling, she gave her answer. Honesty always pays off. Get het to let you know,good or bad,her reasons, Goodluck:)

I'm sorry to hear your manager is giving you such a hard time. I feel there is always some animosity when one finds out you are have applied for another job or accepted another position which is unfortunate really. I would recommend using other references or letting the interviewer know you have have informed your manager and that's all you can do really. You cant force her to return the call or even make the call. Hopefully they are understanding.

Ayvah, RN

Specializes in Med Surg, Specialty. Has 10 years experience.

Can they use a reference from the manager of your PRN job instead? They are also considered a current manager.

diane227, LPN, RN

Specializes in Management, Emergency, Psych, Med Surg. Has 32 years experience.

You cannot force her to call these people back and in fact she may be prohibited from doing this according to hospital policy. Some hospitals only allow reference information to come from HR and that is where they should call. You should call HR for your current facility to find out what the procedure is. If the manager is allowed to call and give reference information then you need to sit down with your current manager and find out what is going on. Since you rarely see her, perhaps she does not feel comfortable giving information about you. Perhaps the reference information should come from the charge nurse on your shift. Would your manager prefer to email a reference rather than speak on the phone? Also, you have to consider that you may not have as good a relationship with her as you think.

MAISY, RN-ER, BSN, RN

Specializes in ER/EHR Trainer. Has 6 years experience.

While it's true she may be prohibited, I find that difficult to believe. In that case, all she had to do was tell you that. I find this to be an act that is passive aggressive and typical of women....don't confront the employee with the whys and hows of changing jobs...but don't make it easy for them to do it....BECAUSE....now I'll have extra work to find a replacement.

Just my:twocents:

I work at a hospital, have worked on my current unit for a little over 3 years. My manager is a nice lady, i've not had any problems with her. As i work nights, I dont see her too much.

I applied for another job a few months ago, outside of the hospital organization. Interviewed. Was told I was one of top candidates, and therefore, they wanted to speak to current manager. I emailed current manager and told her about applying for new job, that it was related to needing more daytime with no nights/weekends/holidays schedule and nothing to do with current unit. That I enjoyed working for her. That interviewer would be contacting her for a reference. She replied that she understood. Next week, interviewer said she hadn't heard back from current manager. So i emailed current manager and gave her a phone number to call interivewer at. she responded that she would. week after that, interviewer called me and said she still hadn't heard from current manager. dont know what happened after that, b/c interviewer never called me back and the position is re-posted online:crying2:. but when i had my annual review, my current manager asked if i ever heard anything back from interviewer. never indicated if she ever called interviewer.

so, then i applied for PRN job taht wouldn't interfere with hospital job at all. That job called current manager for reference, and she never called her back either. This job hired me anyways, using other references. Though this is a great job, its just PRN, nothing guaranteed at all, and not a replacement for full time work, which is what i want.

so, I applied for another job. interviewed. it went well. she contacted one of my work references, who said good things about me. I had 2 other work references that she did not call. She wants to contact current manager now. So she called current manager yesterday and when i talked to interviewer today, she said current manager hadn't called her back!!!! So she's expecting she might hear from her on Monday.

I'm afriad interviewer won't hear from current manager. That she won't call this one back, either. I dont want to lose this great job b/c of my manager not wanting to give a reference/not calling back. Our current job doesn't have any positions posted-so its not like we are crazy short staffed. I'm not a horrible employee, but im not the best one either. I "met standards" on my evaluation. I dont call in a lot/steal drugs/break protocol.

So what do I do? Im afraid if I do nothing, current manager won't call back and I wont get job. I know she's not obligated to give reference...but interviewer isn't obligated to give me the job without the reference!!

Do I email current manager, sweet talk her and ask for reference? (not ask her to lie but just ask her to talk to interviewer!!) or do I wait, and if interviewer hasn't heard from current manager by monday (3 business days since she called her) ask interviewer to consider other references instead?

arrrggghhh!!! i do not want to lose this potential job!!! what do I do ?

As a current nursing manager who is short staffed, I can understand that you boss doesn't want to lose you. However, what he/she is doing is not right. You have to be brave and confront her/him. Not necessarily confrontationally, but with specific examples of how they have impacted your job prospects. Mention the fact that you have never had any negative feedback from him/her, so a reference is justified. Do not send your manager an email, go in and talk face to face. It's a lot harder for somebody to lie or BS you while looking you in the eye. This is a tough situation, I'd be frustrated too. You could always use a reference from your PRN job, or prove your competancy by providing one of your evaluations that show you "meet the standard"

Faeriewand, ASN, RN

Specializes in med/surg/tele/neuro/rehab/corrections. Has 10 years experience.

I have been asked to be a reference for a few friends and I agreed. I was surprised however when the potential employer left me a message and asked me to call THEM! Isn't it the other way around? Well I did call back and left a message all about my friend and I guess that was good enough. But now in the future I am prepared to call back especially after reading this post I can see that is the way it is sometimes.

I think you have received some good advice here. And I do believe your manager thinks she shouldn't have to call anyone back. That's what I thought at first too.

And to the other poster RE passive aggressive behavor. Both men and women equally display this characteristic. :D I have seen it! LOL

Ask your manager to let you know honestly if she's not willing to give you the reference. If she is, ask her availability and have the new company call her at that time. I don't think it's her responsibility to call them.

Otherwise, find another referee. A preceptor, maybe?

I agree that it is not her responsibility to call these people back. And although it is probably a passive aggressive action on her part, she is letting everyone know that she does not appreciate giving up any of her time to assist an employee to find work elsewhere. I would discuss this with future prospective employers and ask them if you could use alternate references. That is about all you can do, unless they continue to call until they get the woman on the line. Good luck.

I think her track record is a proof that she will not call and will not be a good reference for another employer. And you said it too, you lost jobs because of that attitude of hers. If she did that before, why would you still insist on making her a reference? Didn’t you get the drift? I think it’s not uncommon that bosses would not feel good when an employee wants to leave-----especially if they are really good employees.

I think her track record is a proof that she will not call and will not be a good reference for another employer. And you said it too, you lost jobs because of that attitude of hers. If she did that before, why would you still insist on making her a reference? Didn't you get the drift? I think it's not uncommon that bosses would not feel good when an employee wants to leave-----especially if they are really good employees.

Totally agree. When I found out that a previous manager, after giving me his word that he would be a good reference, was in fact seeing that I couldn't get work, I immediately stopped using his name for a reference.

HappyNurse2005, RN

Specializes in LDRP.

I think her track record is a proof that she will not call and will not be a good reference for another employer. And you said it too, you lost jobs because of that attitude of hers. If she did that before, why would you still insist on making her a reference? Didn't you get the drift? I think it's not uncommon that bosses would not feel good when an employee wants to leave-----especially if they are really good employees.

I dont give her name by choice....they ask to speak to my current manager :(

I will update when something else happens. I did email her, since I hardly see her, and asked her nicely for a reference, and said that I understood she was not obligated to give one and if she was unable to do it, then I would no longer provide her name. I was also praising her and the job and letting her know I was not looking for other employment b/c of the job-just b/c i need better hours.

I plan on calling interviewer on MOnday afternoon and if she hasn't heard from current manager, offer up other references-charge nurses, coworkers, etc

wish me luck

Isabel-ANP-BC

Specializes in Adult Health. Has 2 years experience.

I have always explained that I would prefer they not call my current manager (except in one case where the position was being eliminated). This is not because I don't think I will not get a decent reference, but more because I am concerned that it will create bad feelings at work. I use other RNs who work with me, school, and previous jobs. If it comes down to needed to confirm dates of employment for a job, I will allow them to do that. Most recruiters/HR folks and managers understand. If they don't, I probably don't want to work with them.