Ready to give up....

[jschut]

Here I am, a brand new nurse (licensed October 3rd) and I'm ready to give up....

I work in LTC, on nights 7p-7a.

I wasn't oriented, just thrown in (to the dogs, as my DON said once).

As all places, we are extremely short staffed with CNA's. Just found out, there's been alot of complaints about me. I guess I don't answer call lights in a timely fashion. Sorry~ but when I am busy doing something, and there are 2 CNA's on the floor or in the breakroom, I feel it is their job. If I am not busy, I do answer those lights. I help whenever asked....even if I am busy.

and...

Complaints about treatments not being done on time. When I am the only nurse for 64 residents (which I am ALOT!), how many people am I supposed to be? (Been working by myself since I have been licensed only 2 weeks...)

and...

Just recently found out also that a nurse on days that I THOUGHT was my friend has been stabbing me in the back with all these little tidbits she can find. Writes little notes to the DON, complaining about things I don't get done. (She works day shift and has recently become a RN. Personally~ I think she's changed since getting her RN. Some others have come to me and they think so, so I know it isn't just me.) It's not just me she does this to, it's a few of us, I guess, but why not come to me and ask me? (Such as once, I was asked why I hadn't changed a catheter, and it wasn't time in the TX book, so I didn't!) Got my butt in a sling over that one, too! Lectured about how it's due every 30 days or so.... yea, I knew that....so why hadn't I done it? Because it wasn't marked in the TX book that it was due! Still... somehow, my fault.

Got my first write up the other night cause I left insulin in the cart instead of putting it in the fridge. I took it, cause I knew it was my fault, and maybe that's why I'm writing this...that's just the icing on the cake for me. (The new RN above reported this one too....AND the catheter change.....)

I am just so sick of this. I would go elsewhere, but the pay is decent, and there's really no where else in this little town to go. I feel like I am being scrutinized every time I step in the door anymore. Aren't you supposed to feel comfortable where you work in order to be at your peak performance? I feel like I can't do anything right. That everything I do is going to be questioned or double checked.

Sorry guys~ I just needed to vent to someone who knows what it's like.. Hubby tries, but he just don't understand.

Any suggestions or advice? I hate going to work anymore.....

[Love-A-Nurse]

originally posted by katscan

julie, i am afraid that if you remain in this position your opinion of yourself and of nursing will continue to become more negative. you are already looking over your shoulder to see who is keeping "tabs" on you. that is not safe. no one can work and do his or her best in an environment which is hostile. there are many more places that will welcome you-you do not have to put up with this!!!

give your notice, and hold your head up high. you deserve much better. good luck-everyone had to start out once. i only wish some of your colleagues would remember that!

good post.

[jemb]

Being newly licensed wouldn't be easy even under ideal circumstances, but 64 residents??!!! Yikes!

You really need to hightail it out of there asap! (Well, two weeks notice as of today...) You need to protect not only your license, but your ability to be a competent nurse and your peace of mind. Your curent working environment creates a danger to all of those.

[Love-A-Nurse]

julie, for some reason i keep thinking about this thread. i just want you to know, you have nothing to hang your head in shame if you decide to leave and know that you are expected to look out for you when no one else can or will.

[deespoohbear]

Julie,

I agree with the other posters about leaving pronto. Make it clear as day to the DON why you are leaving. Maybe a call to the state ombudsmen or board of health may be in order after you leave that wretched place....Surely there is somewhere you can work. If I remember correctly from a PM you sent me, I know about where you are. Isn't there a hospital there you can apply at? If you live close to the state line, maybe there is a facility you can work at across the state line. Of course it would mean getting a license for that state, but it may be worth the trouble...

No way in Hades should a brand new grad (either RN or LPN) should be left in alone with 64 residents....for that matter, neither should a seasoned nurse.....that is ridiculous.... :eek:

[jschut, BSN, RN]

I want to thank you all for being so supportive. You are a great bunch of folks!

Stephany~ you are right. I would have felt like I was running or that they had "chased me out" if I leave, but I do have to do something. I worked too hard to be a nurse, and I will not let anyone else determine my future or undermine me.

I may get up early and go job hunting tomorrow.

Thank you all again.

[sanakruz, ADN]

Take heed of these posts , my dear.You are being eaten alive.

[VivaLasViejas, ASN, RN]

LTC will chew you up and spit you out if you let it. If you enjoy geriatrics, as I do, please consider assisted living or residential care; they generally treat you better because you're usually the only licensed nurse, plus the work is much easier both physically and emotionally. (I still regret leaving the field for a nursing home care manager position, and am looking into going back to ALFs at some point.) Don't let this facility break you down: they don't deserve you!

[debRNo1]

get out now

you have to get out now. there is no way that a new grad should be on a large unit like that all alone. i worked in ltc for many yrs and just recently got out. you are being back-stabbed by the nurses who leave their undone work for you. they will smile in your face, talk behind your back and then run to the don as soon as you leave the building to rat on you. nursing jobs are very easy to find and beleive me you will have your choice so just be careful not to jump at the first offer. i got into the hospital of my choice for more $ than my ltc job.

i didnt want to feel like i was being intimidated into leaving and worked my way up to supervisor before i left of my own free will. i got my rn 2 yrs ago and began to fear that i would lose what i worked so very hard for. you are in a dangerous situation as i was and they were probably desperate for staff so they hired you because you didnt know any better. i was taken advantage of for many years took my lumps from them and continued on to become an rn which really enraged them and they hated me more!!?? very few could said congrats when i passed the boards, my unit was 51 beds and the fact that they started taking st rehab pts with a crappy staff and nurses who coulnt care less really opened my eyes i guess.

the place was filled with evil hateful people and i feel for you. its bad enough when they talk and gossip but when the write ups start you gotta go. as far as the cna's go you have to supervise these wanna-be's and their shift long breaks they are bullies and want to be your boss. yes you can do their work but they cant do yours. when i did resign my don harrassed me so bad for 3 wks but i again went in with my head held high and proud to have gotten my new position.

i worked there for 8 years and 2 as a "management" member. i cant tell you how many times i put money in for a collection for someone i hardly knew because they were "leaving" after a month or so. oh there were balloons, braclets, cakes, bagels, and other nifty gifts. do you know what they gave me after 8 years of hard work, dedication, and commitment ?????

$hit..

half of those mf's couldnt bring themselves to even say goodbye. what a kick in the butt that was and it really burned me up. i feel like an idiot used and abused for so many yrs. said i would stay per diem but re-thought that real quick after i got out

i did have a few allies and they call to say they miss me and tell me i am still the topic of choice for gossip. the don called a few she knew i was close with to ask the "real" reason i left.........

i even got an unsigned hand written letter sent to my house on xmas eve calling me every name in the book along with some other hurtful things on facility stationary with facilty postmark. nice huh ?? a place where evils lurks........

please get out i did and wont look back i have no regrets at all

lots of luck........

sorry to ramble you hit a soft spot i guess !!??

deb :rotfl:

[opalmRN]

"I feel like I can't do anything right. That everything I do is going to be questioned or double checked."

If someone has the time to go back and check your work then the facility should be using the money they pay that person and give you more help!

Life is a journey, not a destination. It is time for you to continue your journey and move on.

I agree with the other posts, all the time, money, blood, sweat and tears you put into getting that nursing degree could be in jeopardy if you remain.

Come here and vent anytime but save your sanity and get out of that place!

We Care,

Cathy

[Tweety, BSN, RN]

Good luck whatever you decide. Start to keep a log of your problems and give them the exit interview of their life. Tell them it's to help them not eat alive the next new nurse that comes along.

Remember though as a new grad you're going to be slower, going to be overwhelmed, going to need a little help and support. That's normal. It took me well over a year before I got my act together. You can't do it all.

Good luck.

[BMS4]

Julie, everyone has given you great advice, so I'll just add my support. Take care of yourself.

[ChristenLPN, LPN]

"I would have felt like I was running or that they had "chased me out" if I leave, but I do have to do something. I worked too hard to be a nurse, and I will not let anyone else determine my future or undermine me."

You poor child, you sound like an exact echo of me 2 years ago! You are not being run off- you are exploring the vast opportunites available to you so you don't have to remain in an environment that is clearly toxic. You can be certain that if any of these backstabbing, unprofessional, immature, petty and spiteful losers had the opportunities that you have open to you, they'd run over their mothers to get out of there. Hold your head up high, believe in yourself, and make sure you do one of those snotty Princess-y waves when you leave!'''

Been there, done that, thinking of you,

Christen

:rotfl: