"YOU'RE my Nurse?!?!?"

BittyBabyGrower, MSN, RN · Jun 14, 2006

I know how it is! I am still thought to be really young even in my 40's! You will love your youthful look in 20 years, but right now I know how much of a pain the tush it is! When I got out of school, a lot of docs and parents thought I was an aide still in high school. I took to wearing my curly hair up and I did have to watch how I talked to people, not lapsing into my "young" tone LOL. You have to learn to present yourself :) There are docs that are very surprised to learn that I have been at it for 20 some years :) Then they take me a bit more seriously LOL

Good luck!

Jo Dirt · Jun 14, 2006

It's time to transition from the young girl to the working woman. Don't know if this applies to you, we can only assume here, but perhaps a shorter/more mature hairstyle, more conservative make up.

I know a woman who graduated with a BSN at age 22. She was (and still is) a natural beauty, (I'm not funny or anything, so don't misunderstand me). She is gorgeous. But she also had an air about her that was very professional and her abilities were never in question. OF course, I'm green with jealousy here, I looked like an overgrown 10 yr old until I was about 24, then "blossomed" into cleaning lady ugly. In fact, I'm regularly mistaken for everything EXCEPT a nurse.

I will never forget, I was standing near the nurses station and a woman came up and asked for the nurse. I relished the look of shock on her face when I told her I *was* the nurse. It was a golden moment.

TheCommuter, BSN, RN · Jun 14, 2006

I'm a 25 year-old who looks like an 18 year-old. Most, if not all, of my geriatric patients know I'm the nurse. I dress conservatively and walk into their rooms with confidence. They'll take me seriously as long as I am not fumbling around.

It is really the family members who frequently mistake me for being a student or a CNA.

MA Nurse · Jun 14, 2006

Hello everyone! I would like some insight on an issue I am having...I am 22 years old and will be graduating in December with my ADN. I have found that within the healthcare setting I am frequently seen as very young-looking (maybe because most of the patients I deal with are elderly). However, I am beginning to think that perhaps I won't be taken seriously? I am afraid that my patients will not trust me. A few patients have asked me if I was "of age" to be "doing this." A few have confused me for being a HIGH SCHOOL student. I see this as being a potential problem in the future when I am their primary nurse. What does everyone think about this?

I was 22 when I graduated, too. I received the same comments. I just smiled at the patients...they were fine after I just smiled and said, "Yes, I'm a nurse."

For a long time, one other nurse and I were the youngest in our unit....now that I'm 39, I sometimes feel VERY OLD

when I see residents who look like they're going through puberty!

Take the "young" compliments while you can...just let them know you knew you wanted to be a nurse and didn't want to wait!

I still have co-workers tell me I'm so young...I think the average nurse is 40-ish from what I remember reading.

Hang in there!

TheCommuter, BSN, RN · Jun 14, 2006

I still have co-workers tell me I'm so young...I think the average nurse is 40-ish from what I remember reading.

You are correct. The average nurse in the U.S. is 46 years old.

allnurses Guide · Jun 14, 2006

It's time to transition from the young girl to the working woman. Don't know if this applies to you, we can only assume here, but perhaps a shorter/more mature hairstyle, more conservative make up.
I know a woman who graduated with a BSN at age 22. She was (and still is) a natural beauty, (I'm not funny or anything, so don't misunderstand me). She is gorgeous. But she also had an air about her that was very professional and her abilities were never in question. OF course, I'm green with jealousy here, I looked like an overgrown 10 yr old until I was about 24, then "blossomed" into cleaning lady ugly. In fact, I'm regularly mistaken for everything EXCEPT a nurse.
I will never forget, I was standing near the nurses station and a woman came up and asked for the nurse. I relished the look of shock on her face when I told her I *was* the nurse. It was a golden moment.

I hear ya. I swear, I was always mistaken for a much younger person until about three years ago, and then I too "blossomed" into the lunchlady. I'm ugly as a mud fence.

I'm getting plastic surgery. I have made up my mind.

MommyandRN · Jun 15, 2006

I am 29 years old and still get this. At first when I was 22 I was upset by it too. It still bothers me but I try not to get upset. My one patient recently asked me where my "boss" was. I thought he meant the nurse manager but I realized he thought I should be with a preceptor. I confidently told him that I've been a nurse for 7 years and I'm all by myself! He looked a little uncomfortable but as the day went on I think he realized that I was more knowledgeable than he originally thought. I get it from family members too, I notice them talking to me differently than others. I think it's because besides looking young, I put on my "nice" voice which makes me sound young too.

My advice would be is to stand your ground. TEll them that yes, you are their nurse, that you have passed your baords and went to school for this. Smile and walk away. Just be confident. If you let them get to you then you will start doubting yourself and your ability. You are cpable of being their nurse and they will see that as the day goes on.

toadie · Jun 15, 2006

i'm 24 but appear to be 16 on a good day. i had a pt last week who refused to take medications from me because i was too young to know anything about meds and must therefore be attempting to poison him. :angryfire the other nurse who ended up having to give my pt his asa thought it was pretty funny.

MommyandRN · Jun 15, 2006

go to a beauty salon and ask them to help you look older
it does help!!!! i'm 22 and i still look the same as i did at 16

I disagree with this though. I think a nurse at 22 does not need to get an older woman's haircut just to get her patients to take her seriously. Yes pink hair and nose piercings are not always a good idea. But a nurse with long haor and a few highlights in a ponytail should not be assumed to be 16. She has a life outisde of her job and shouldn't have to make over her hairstyle for her job.

carolinapooh, BSN, RN · Jun 15, 2006

I'm 33 (today, actually - so HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME!!), I wear a suit to work most days, and I still get talked to like I'm 19. I wear my hair up in a bun or twisted up into a clip (with no loose ends hanging out, ponytail style, either), keep my nails unpainted and neatly trimmed, and have only one pair of earrings (no extra piercings anywhere, either) - and I get carded for after-work drinks. I've been asked by primary investigators (we do clinical trial management) how am I enjoying my first job, and I've been asked by study coordinators when will I finish college. (Here lately I say I'll complete my second BS in December of 2007, but I completed my first in 1995 - to which they usually respond "OH" - and you can watch them struggle with the mental math!) When I was interviewed for my current position, I could see the wheels turning in the interviewer's mind as he tried to figure out how old I am based on my employment background (I only list four jobs on my current resume, as they cover the last 12 years!).

Sometimes, nothing you do works - and you just have to take it in stride. Yes - it annoys me sometimes - but I do have a private laugh to myself when I'm patronized in a store by someone who is probably forty and looks seventy - who asks for my ID to verify my credit card, and then does a double-take when he/she sees my date of birth! :lol2: :lol2:

weekend warrior, BSN, RN · Jun 15, 2006

;) From time to time, I do get this too, though I am hardly 22 ! I'm 36 and have been at my hospital for 13 yrs! But I get the half scared, half exasperated " oh great, I've got a newbie " look sometimes. They too usually start with some probing questions, like how long have you been a nurse etc... Reassuring them that you are confidant puts them at ease.

You can't help that yes you are young, and yes you are new. But you can make them feel that you will give the best care you can. I find it helps to zone in on something that they feel is important to them and advocate for them or at least make them feel you recognize their concern. They may ask questions you are not sure about, if you don't know then say you will find out for them.

You will do fine! In another 6 months, you will feel just as burnt out as the rest of us oldies ! hahaha!

JentheRN05, RN · Jun 16, 2006

Excellent advice. It's all in the presentation and the confidence and talk.
(Yes, the squeaky Valley Girl voice doesn't work. I work with a women who is now 20, but was homeschooled and become an ADN RN at age 18. She comes to work with four different shades of hair, a pierced nose, and too much eye makeup. (not to judge because she looked good, but for the nose piercing but I bet she had the same probelm as the op.) There is no need to look like you're still 16 when you're 20 and a professional nurse.
I don't mean to imply the op is like this, just tell a story.

I have to respond to this because currently my normally blonde hair is partially fushia. Reasons for this are numerous, I have had alot of recent tragedy in my life and am trying to lift my own spirits. Funny thing about it is, as I am attempting to lift my own, it also lifts the spirits of my patients. I actually get alot of compliments on it.

So what originated as a cheerer-upper for me, turned out to be a cheerer-upper for everyone around me.

I'm 34 (soon to be 35).