"Sharing Humour"

Davey Do · Apr 7, 2018

So in class today, the teacher confirmed something for me: when medical professionals make jokes, it's not to help the patients like they claim, it's really for themselves (providing some distance between themselves and the patient)..

Now, now, Dinatg. Your premise, "when medical professionals make jokes... it's really for themselves" is broad and vague.

To include a patient in humor can lighten a tense or stressful situation for all involved, to everyone's benefit.

I'm still upset over the doctor I had during my teenage years and a nursing friend I had during those years cracking jokes about my body issues

I am sorry this has happened to you. No one should ever have to suffer at another's expense.

There are ways of dealing with past pains. It would be to your benefit to seek out these methods. If some direction is desired, I'm sure others and myself can give you some ideas and information.

The very best to you, Dinatg.

Buckeye.nurse · Apr 7, 2018

Humor, when used correctly (know the context and your audience), can be very beneficial. I generally don't use humor until I know my patient well (think 6+ hours into the shift), and know whether they will appreciate it.

It's also worth mentioning that sometimes patients will use humor (or gruffness) as a coping mechanism to mask fear and anxiety.

JKL33 · Apr 7, 2018

So in class today, the teacher confirmed something for me: when medical professionals make jokes, it's not to help the patients like they claim, it's really for themselves (providing some distance between themselves and the patient).

It's very unfortunate that your teacher presented this as a fact that applies to all situations. That was incorrect. The additional implication that professionals only make jokes from a positon of dishonesty is also incorrect and inappropriate. You did not receive correct information.

I'm still upset over the doctor I had during my teenage years and a nursing friend I had during those years cracking jokes about my body issues, and wanting to be treated like heroes afterward.

Understandably upsetting. "Cracking jokes" about a patient (even if the jokes are statements that a patient may very well make themselves) is dangerous territory. Often patients' jokes about themselves contain underpinnings of self-deprecation...so it's never going to work for someone else to try to show camaraderie by joining in.

Davey (above) talks about humor, rather than joking. Use of humor can be a very important tool. Making jokes, outside of a fairly close relationship (or very good rapport), is something different and is often unwise - and even when there is an established relationship it can be iffy. We tend to be kind of sensitive about "things about ourselves that it's okay for others to find funny."

Davey Do · Apr 9, 2018

I generally don't use humor until I know my patient well

The same goes for coworkers.

I don't use humor until I know my coworkers. I have, in the past, used humor around coworkers with poor boundaries and it's like anything can be made fun of, to the other's expense.

I also do not use humor around those I find not to be competent in carrying out their duties. It's like the humor distracts them and their ability to carry out their duties suffers even more.

I try to be polite and civil to all, but humor definitely has its person, place and time.

allnurses Guide · Apr 9, 2018

Just tonight I had a patient thank me for making him laugh, after I had done his discharge. I use humor quite often, but I am pretty good at knowing who is going to be receptive.

Distancing? Nah. Putting a scared child or nervous adult at a little bit of ease is what I am doing. If I can make a joke, it must not be as bad as they thought?

However, I do not make jokes about a patient condition, etc. as you described happened to you. Jokes need to be impersonal, distractions, not put downs.

RNperdiem, RN · Apr 9, 2018

Sometimes a touch of dark humor can be helpful in certain situations. I would never share what I am thinking with patients or coworkers.

Humor can be for our benefit, and that is not a bad thing.

Dinatg · Apr 9, 2018

So have there been times when you've been the patient, and you felt better because a pro used humour?

RNperdiem, RN · Apr 9, 2018

I haven't been a patient much in my lifetime, but I am the mother of a special-needs child and interact a lot with doctors, nurses, hospitals, EMS and just about everyone else.

Humor helps my son and the family deal with the unpredictable nature of chronic illness.

Over the course of the last 14 years, I can't remember any kind of humor used by them. The providers played pretty straight. Everyone has their own style, and I have just never been upset with anyone. My son and I are the kinds of people who just don't get upset easily either.

JKL33 · Apr 9, 2018

So have there been times when you've been the patient, and you felt better because a pro used humour?

I have had professionals use good-natured humor with a crotchety grandparent. He laughed like crazy and later said, "That guy's alright."

sevensonnets · Apr 9, 2018

A little humor is a great way to connect with patients and makes the day a little brighter for you and the patient!

Davey Do · Apr 9, 2018

So have there been times when you've been the patient, and you felt better because a pro used humour?

About 25 years ago, I had an ACL tear that required surgery. While setting up the surgery date, the ortho happened to mention that it was to be done on his birthday.

I made a birthday card with a caricature of the ortho sawing through a bone with a typical carpenter's saw and presented it to him before the surgery.

The ortho laughed, pointed at the caricature, and asked, "Is that me?" I replied that it was. He then pointed at the bone and said, "Well then, that's you!"