"6 months notice is customary"

Nurses General Nursing

Published

I got a new job last week which I am very excited about. I told my agency yesterday and they were really happy for me. Said I was a definite re-hire if I wanted to return. I gave three and a half weeks notice. I told the family today and they were horrible. I told the father since the mother was at work and my agency needed them to know so they could set up times for the new nurses taking my place and he was so rude. I was upset but it was expected so I was over it pretty quickly. On my way home, the mother called me. I decided to answer, now I wish I would have gone with my gut and hit no.

For the next 20 minutes she told me how unprofessional I am being only giving two weeks notice. That as a professional I should be giving at least 6 months notice. 2-3 months if you must. She couldn't believe my agency was okay with my behavior and even made a crack at my mother's parenting skills. She implied I didn't care about her son and she learned something about me today and it wasn't a good thing. The thing that upset me the most (and it showed) was when she asked if I just abandoned my other patient too. My other patient died yesterday so this was a touchy subject. I tried half way to get off the phone but she kept talking, finally I said I have to go. I will see you Friday. I am so glad I am leaving, I am hoping I can get through the next couple of weeks without exploding.

Since when has two weeks not been enough? She said only secretaries can give two weeks. Us "professionals" need to give more.

Yeah, she's kinda insane. I would let the agency know how she reacted. Cover your ***, ya know?

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Specializes in Med/Surg, DSU, Ortho, Onc, Psych.

Call back the mother. Tell her STRAIGHT on the phone that you do not appreciate being spoken to in that manner. Direct confrontation always works best. She will be taken aback. And no you don't have to give 6 months notice - when u call, ask her where on earth she got that figure from. It's usually 2-3 weeks notice. Tell her this. The Mum sou

What on earth has she got to do with this anyway? If you have told ur agency, let them deal with it. Get the manafer to call the Mum & tell her not to call you outside of working hours. I myself would not tolerate this personally. The Mum is probably upset ur leaving, well, unfortunately that is life, people move on/move away, and people die and that is life - we can't change that.

But I would definitely tell the agency so they know for future reference, & have them deal with it.

Actually I would take 2 weeks notice as leave time and not go back, just to annoy everyone and still tell the Mum I don't appreciate being denigrated. It might make her & the agency (if they don't deal properly with ur complaint) think twice about abusing people. And this IS abuse, believe me. I've had patients abuse me and I've told them I can make a formal complaint to police & take it to a civil court, & they ALWAYS without exception shapen up and apologise. After me saying that, they start acting like a civil human being!

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Specializes in Family Practice, Mental Health.

I would advise against allowing more opportunities for this woman to extract punishment for "abandoning" her. It's time to create a paper trail juuuust in case this woman decides to be creative.

Only you know this person well enough to decide how careful you need to be. Write down the details of the conversation on a piece of paper and submit copies to your office and keep one for yourself. The more light of day that shines on the facts early on, the less likely it is for miscommunication to harbor ill will later.

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Specializes in Peds/outpatient FP,derm,allergy/private duty.

Wow. I'm sorry for you being attacked like that by your patient's mother! We give blood, sweat and tears for the families many times, and that's got to hurt when they express that pain in such a personal way.

There is no playbook for PDN and there are possible pitfalls throughout. I know you've, read, as I have, some of the stickly situations nurses find themselves in. It happens so gradually. You gave her your personal phone number. I know many who wouldn't even do that. You don't want to be a cold fish, bu t in the end it's your life, and your time.

Obviously, 3.5 weeks is plenty of notice. Since there really isn't anything to lose at this point, you could try saying something to her about how hard it must be to have a child dependent on skilled nursing care but not able to control what other people do, or when it happens. Most parents in this situation have developed some psychological battle scars. There is no excuse for what she did, but 3 weeks of tension and avoidance would be really stressful also.

Anyway, you understand the dynamics of the family . . and the worst part of that (informing the family), hopefully is over. Best wishes in your new job!! :up: :)

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Specializes in Cardiac Care.

6 months? Who knows 6months in advance that they are getting a new job? Come on she is just a witch! Its not like she wont have coverage, I repeat, its the parents not the patients that make this job harder.

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Specializes in Cardiac Critical Care.

This lowly "secretary" here thinks 2 weeks is plenty. This woman has shown you her true colors - be glad you aren't working with her anymore!

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Specializes in Emergency/Cath Lab.

*Click*

Ignore.

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Specializes in Critical Care, ED, Cath lab, CTPAC,Trauma.

Parents of very ill children with many complex needs are very anxious people that have very special needs. They HATE change. ANY CHANGE! :eek: It's actually a compliment that they are so upset about you leaving.....it means they trust you implicitly with the welfare of their child and that since you've been there they've had peace of mind. Now they need to return to that constant state worry and anxiety that something will happen to their special child and that something will happen.

It was a tantrum, but one bore form anxiety and desperation on NOW what are they going to do? What's going to happen? Parents complicated chronic peds patients become extremely dependent on their caregivers once they trust them. Many have experienced some pretty hair raising things while on this journey of having a chronically ill child in the fight to keep them alive. She's panicked! :eek: and thinking then she'd have time to change your mind. That's all....and she was trying to play on guilt to get you to stay......Just like the toddler that screams when their Mother leaves them in day care they become terrified that they will be alone forever and something horrible is going to happen.......They are inconsolable while they see you but they'll stop crying when you're gone.

Try to be understanding and ease their anxiety. They remain angry but that isn't your fault. Their anxiety and anger are in direct correlation to how much they like and trust you....:redbeathe

Good Luck on your new job!!!!!

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After that phone conversation, my next move would have been to call the agency and make my resignation from the case immediate, due to the untenable atmosphere presented by the clients. And no agency demands six months notice. Most people leave cases when they please, usually no or little notice. Only one agency has ever demanded two weeks notice from me, and it had nothing to do with home health propriety, but everything to do with the agency buying time to find a replacement. Don't let these people treat you like dirt.

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PediLove2147 you sound like a gem! Just curious, because I don't work home care cases.....Why didn't the agency take on the task of simply informing the family of a change in staff and start to coordinate interviews? The family has contracted the agency, not you directly (e.g. like found you by advertising and taking on the hiring themselves). From my perspective in HR related issues, you have ended employment with the agency, now the agency needs to adjust staffing for their client. I can see that no matter what you may have a few more shifts with the (tantrum throwing!) mother, father, and child, but I think it should have fallen squarely on the shoulders of your nurse supervisor and the agency to deal with the family from the git go. And best luck on the new job!

Many times agency personnel dump their communication responsibilties on the nurses.

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Ooh, if someone had said something to me about my mother's parenting skills, it would have on - like Donkey Kong :smokin: We would have went there!

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Life involves change. Congratulations on your new job!

And for the Mom, she has learned the universe does not revolve around

her needs...never in 1 million years would she give 6 months notice

when leaving a job. Who is she kidding?

The agency should replace you now instead of dragging out this

inappropriate behavior by Mom. Are there not other assignments you

could cover until your departure?

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