"From doctors to beautiful ladies..."

carolinapooh, BSN, RN · May 12, 2006

i'm sorry if i seem dense, but i'd much rather have a compliment, than not get one cause the person was afraid of not being politically correct.
a good nurse will get respect from people.
just wondering what you would have preferred mr. richards to have said? really not trying to be snotty, just don't understand the depth of your apparent displeasure with his comment.

i have to agree.

if i walked around second guessing everything people said to or about me, i don't know how i'd get anything done. to me, this is the problem with everything - extensive overinterpretation. now this poor guy who just had brain surgery and thought he was being nice is going to get blasted.

i feel sorry for men. i don't know how or why they even bother to go out of their way to say, "you look nice today" to a woman. lord knows i'd be scared of a lawsuit for sexual harrassment.

i don't have time to tar everyone with the same brush. i get bitten for it, but i sleep better at night knowing i'm neither wasting energy with worrying about stuff, or labeling someone who's completely innocent. i know my heart is in the right place, and personally i'd rather get burned for that than being branded a rabble-rouser or worse.

again, just my opinion. not trying to offend anyone, though i'm sure i will... :saint:

eta: we've whipped and beaten the english language into political correctness to the point that it's beginning to lose its meaning. no one can say anything anymore without fear of reprisal. it's getting too tedious for me.

tryingtomakeit, RN · May 12, 2006

I have to agree.
If I walked around second guessing everything people said to or about me, I don't know how I'd get anything done. To me, this is the problem with everything - extensive overinterpretation. Now this poor guy who just had brain surgery and thought he was being nice is going to get blasted.
I feel sorry for men. I don't know how or why they even bother to go out of their way to say, "You look nice today" to a woman. Lord knows I'd be scared of a lawsuit for sexual harrassment.
I don't have time to tar everyone with the same brush. I get bitten for it, but I sleep better at night knowing I'm neither wasting energy with worrying about stuff, or labeling someone who's completely innocent. I know my heart is in the right place, and personally I'd rather get burned for that than being branded a rabble-rouser or worse.

burikat_mata · May 12, 2006

Beautiful doesn't always refer to looks! I can't believe I would actually defend Keith Richards in any regard but the guy probably meant well. He did after all just have brain surgery, and he was most likely making reference to the good care he received.
You know he also called New Zealanders "Kiwis" and I'm sure he probably made a few other choice remarks that weren't quoted. Us nurses fighting for a better image in the world should pick our battles a little more carefully. We would do much better to go after the people with their brains fully intact who insult nurses. I think I would just smile and take the compliment.
But I have a feeling like I'm going to get flamed! :chair:

Nah...I'm totally on your side.. :clown:

smk1, LPN · May 12, 2006

I guess I think of Keith coming from a generation where nurses were just "beautiful angels in white" who basically did whatever docs said. (or so that seemed to be the perception). I think he probably meant it as a compliment. Working in LTC for clinicals this term, there have been quite a few inappropriate comments made to me both about race (i am black) and prettiness by the older gentlemen. If they are trying to be nice I don't give them a lesson in current political correctness... Not that I'm saying Keith richards is 80 years old and senile.

tencat · May 12, 2006

Not that I'm saying Keith richards is 80 years old and senile.

He's pretty dang close!

rambisisking · May 12, 2006

Is it totally screwed up that I like it when older men say stuff like that? It's like your grandpa (KEITH RICHARDS??? I know, I know) saying something to you or something.
My dad, who was 74, once said to one of his nurses (he was whacked out on morphine, mind you) that she was much too pretty for him to give her a hard time. (He had become belligerent the night before over them changing the type of O2 mask he'd been using. It was chalked up to the morphine.) She was about 23 (she was a senior RN) and she just smiled at him, patting his hand and telling him he was OK and not to worry. Old men can be quite cute that way, and I don't think offense should automatically be taken.
Richards could have meant "beautiful" in attitude, or manner - not just looks. My DH is a Brit and often refers to people as having been "just beautiful" - meaning they were easy to work with, pleasant, and just generally provided a good experience.
I went to college with a couple of girls from NZ and they referred to themselves as kiwis - as do the Brits. My Australian friends don't take offense to "Aussie" - unless they're being cussed out! (I've been around Brits that make me bristle at the word "American" or "Yank".) I don't think it's necessarily a pejorative term, but again, it's all in the context.
ETA: I used to be a pharmacy technician at CVS. This old Italian - and I mean dyed-in-the-wool, straight-outta-Rome, purebred, still-got-the-Mediterranean-accent old Italian man - used to come in and flirt almost shamelessly with me. He'd take my hand in his two, and say all that stereotypical Italian stuff....once he asked me if I was married, and when I told him yes, he looked me in the eye and said, "Does he ever tell you how beautiful you are? Because if he doesn't, I'd be glad to tell you myself." I'm reasonably cute - and I have strawberry blonde hair, which could have been the catalyst given his Med roots - but I wouldn't say I was beautiful...but oh man, you couldn't help but eat it up....he was just a cute, harmless old man whose wife had been gone for many years, and he was just lonely and it made him feel good to get a coy smile out of a woman practically young enough to be his great-granddaughter. He was the sweetest thing. I could be having a lousy day, full of ungrateful customers, and then he'd toddle in in his freshly cleaned khakis and polo shirt, and just make you forget that you could have swatted the last three people who came in. Absolutely adorable. If was about fifty years older and single, I'd be inviting him down to movie night at the retirement home. What a class act. I told my DH about it and he thought it was cute. My heart used to break for him when he'd pick up his meds and go home to what I was sure was a lonely little room at the local retirement center, sitting in front of his TV by himself, even though I was sure he had lots of friends. He had to with that personality. But little old men like him just break my heart. (I never worry about the widows like I do the widowers.)
What in the world could be offensive about THAT? Come on, folks, we need to lighten up a bit here....just my humble - very humble - opinion.

Now see, I don't think it is screwed up at all and I understand the very well the examples you have stated. I have always loved older men treating me as they would have a lady of their time. You have to understand where people are comming from and what their norm is. I was raised around alot of old country people and as you say " What is politically correct would not really be part of their knowledge. Their charm can be appreciated for what it is, and not taken as an insult. We all need to get over ourselves. I worked in an ltc for 17 years, We had a mantience...all around general purpose man, he called all the girls and ladies "BABE", even the patients. But if you knew anything about this man you knew that he respected women and was at our side in any emergency or difficult situation doing everything he could to help and after singing our praises and complementing us. There was alot of mixed feelings about him depending on whether you were an old or young nurse, although even some of the younger girls looked up to him because they could see his worth. Sometimes we would tease him and call him babe and he'd smile shyly and say "Don't let the wife hear you say that" with a wink. His wife was also very helpful around the place and so knew everyone. When he died, there was no one that didn't go and cry and cry, we loved him and we missed being called babe with that twinkle in his eye. I know exactly what you are saying and I'm glad that there are some of us that can still see beyond a word or two.

allnurses Guide · May 13, 2006

I have to agree. Or, given my outward appearance, I have to hope that's what he meant. Rock on, Keith!

Rock on Angie!

steph

Works2xs · May 13, 2006

So... let me see if I understand this correctly.

A man, as legendary for the abuses heaped on his mind and body as for his "rock"-ablity, produced a statement regarding his thanks for the care he received.

I'm not sure which amazes me more. The thought that a person's words would be deemed to be that important when his only qualification is an ability to pluck a string in a wildly popular way. Or the predilection of some individuals to porifice such an individual's every utterance for purpose of finding something to become inflammed about.

I suspect that if he'd taken the time to run his statement through a bevy of lawyers, publicists, and political advisors to prevent such an affront, we'd be hearing complaints about how upsetting it was that such a person couldn't utter a simple thanks.

Next up: Mick insults all married nurses by referring to Keith's nurse as "Miss".

allnurses Guide · May 13, 2006

I have to agree.
If I walked around second guessing everything people said to or about me, I don't know how I'd get anything done. To me, this is the problem with everything - extensive overinterpretation. Now this poor guy who just had brain surgery and thought he was being nice is going to get blasted.
I feel sorry for men. I don't know how or why they even bother to go out of their way to say, "You look nice today" to a woman. Lord knows I'd be scared of a lawsuit for sexual harrassment.
I don't have time to tar everyone with the same brush. I get bitten for it, but I sleep better at night knowing I'm neither wasting energy with worrying about stuff, or labeling someone who's completely innocent. I know my heart is in the right place, and personally I'd rather get burned for that than being branded a rabble-rouser or worse.
Again, just my opinion. Not trying to offend anyone, though I'm sure I will...
ETA: we've whipped and beaten the English language into political correctness to the point that it's beginning to lose its meaning. No one can say anything anymore without fear of reprisal. It's getting too tedious for me.

You too Carolina . . rock on! :pumpiron:

There is an older man here locally who sends me copies of his books and photos of his paintings all because I sat at his bedside one day and listened to him talk about his life as a horse trainer and how he loved and lost his "Mary". He also sent me the poem he wrote to Mary when he went looking for her again in old age and found her in the graveyard - love lost again.

Taking a little time with another human being can be an amazing thing and I'll take being called beautiful for it.

steph

allnurses Guide · May 13, 2006

So... let me see if I understand this correctly.
A man, as legendary for the abuses heaped on his mind and body as for his "rock"-ablity, produced a statement regarding his thanks for the care he received.
I'm not sure which amazes me more. The thought that a person's words would be deemed to be that important when his only qualification is an ability to pluck a string in a wildly popular way. Or the predilection of some individuals to porifice such an individual's every utterance for purpose of finding something to become inflammed about.
I suspect that if he'd taken the time to run his statement through a bevy of lawyers, publicists, and political advisors to prevent such an affront, we'd be hearing complaints about how upsetting it was that such a person couldn't utter a simple thanks.
Next up: Mick insults all married nurses by referring to Keith's nurse as "Miss".

Funny stuff . . . . .

steph

Sheri257 · May 13, 2006

ETA: we've whipped and beaten the English language into political correctness to the point that it's beginning to lose its meaning. No one can say anything anymore without fear of reprisal. It's getting too tedious for me.

:yeah:

PANurseRN1 · May 13, 2006

So... let me see if I understand this correctly.
A man, as legendary for the abuses heaped on his mind and body as for his "rock"-ablity, produced a statement regarding his thanks for the care he received.
I'm not sure which amazes me more. The thought that a person's words would be deemed to be that important when his only qualification is an ability to pluck a string in a wildly popular way. Or the predilection of some individuals to porifice such an individual's every utterance for purpose of finding something to become inflammed about.
I suspect that if he'd taken the time to run his statement through a bevy of lawyers, publicists, and political advisors to prevent such an affront, we'd be hearing complaints about how upsetting it was that such a person couldn't utter a simple thanks.
Next up: Mick insults all married nurses by referring to Keith's nurse as "Miss".

Actually, Keith is a gifted musician and is considered to be one of the best guitarists in the history of rock and roll. He's not just "plucking a string in a wildly popular manner."

In any event, this is much ado about nothing. At least he recognized that nurses helped him during his illness. Let's just accept his heartfelt thanks.