Professional (Dis) Courtesy

NanaPoo · Sep 11, 2016

I have to admit that when I'm really sick, like sick enough to be hospitalized, I don't want to be treated like a nurse. I don't want the hospital staff to use medical terminology with me. I want them to speak in simple terms & treat me like a normal person. I remember always being somewhat nervous when I knew I had an RN for a patient and I don't want my nurse to feel that way with me.

With that said, I believe it's noted in my record at my local hospital because the nurses instantly ask me about my nursing job when I'm admitted!

allnurses Guide · Sep 11, 2016

I have to admit that when I'm really sick, like sick enough to be hospitalized, I don't want to be treated like a nurse. I don't want the hospital staff to use medical terminology with me. I want them to speak in simple terms & treat me like a normal person. I remember always being somewhat nervous when I knew I had an RN for a patient and I don't want my nurse to feel that way with me.
With that said, I believe it's noted in my record at my local hospital because the nurses instantly ask me about my nursing job when I'm admitted!

I agree with you. When I had an emergency cesarean with my last child (first 3 normal vag deliveries) I knew the nurse taking care of me and she did not do a good job of talking to me about what to expect or how to care for myself afterwards. Basically, she figured I was a L&D nurse and knew it all. I got no teaching at all.

Well, from the perspective of a brand new experience, for me, and a scary one at that, I would have appreciated being treated like any other patient.

Another experience not related to being a nurse especially but we have an awesome hospice volunteer whose background is as a social worker. When her husband was dying from cancer, she completely needed our help with how to manage at home and to tell her what to expect with the kind of cancer her husband had. We didn't assume she knew how to handle things.

My own father-in-law ended up being in our hospice and I stepped back and let the nurses handle talking to my family about things. I wanted to be the daughter-in-law, not the hospice nurse.

I rarely tell people I'm a nurse when I'm in a medical situation with a family member.

AutumnApple · Sep 11, 2016

:unsure:

I didn't tell people when I had my gallbladder taken out.

https://allnurses.com/general-nursing-discussion/the-nurse-as-996736-page2.html#post8593633

I don't tell because, well.........it's complicated. I just like to relax and forget about being a nurse. I don't want to be a bother. I just want the usual treatment everyone else gets. I work hard not to let my mind go into that "I'd have done that different" space.

I feel I'm more capable of giving people room to do things different (not wrong) when I just forget I'm a nurse too.

Like I said, it's hard to explain.

compassionresearcher · Sep 11, 2016

If the nurse knows what they're doing, there is no reason to be nervous. And of course you would not expect someone to know details about a specialty they're not trained in. I have limited oncology experience, but when I take my mother to her chemo appointments I make sure to have read up on what's going on and I ask questions and expect meaningful answers.

Like I said, if a cardiologist went to an OB/Gyn for treatment I highly doubt they'd stay quiet about their for profession out of fear of making the MD nervous. If anything, they get treated better!!

macawake, MSN · Sep 11, 2016

I say, let's say announce it with pride and treat our colleagues, who happen to be patients, with the love and respect they deserve.

All my patients (along with all other human beings) deserve that I show them respect. I don't really think that my patients who happen to be nurses deserve more respect than my other patients do. I'm not sure what you mean when you say "love" but to me that sounds too personal in the nurse-patient context and it doesn't describe what I feel for my patients. I think respect, kindness and professionalism is an appropriate approach.

Do you tell doctors/nurses etc what you do for a living when you're on the other side of the bed?

I haven't been hospitalized since I became a nurse but I don't think I'd share that information. I'm guessing though that they'd figure it out soon enough. I know that I do with my own nurse and physician patients, it usually becomes obvious from the questions they ask and the language that they use.

compassionresearcher · Sep 11, 2016

Thanks for your response. Yes, I agree all patients deserve the same amount of respect. My suggestion to respect and love our colleagues was not to imply they deserve more than other patients but rather they shouldn't be resented for stating their profession, which is the vibe I got from posts written in different threads. I meant love in the sense of companionate love, expressing compassion and collegiality.

Rexie · Sep 11, 2016

I mostly like taking care of nurses or people in health care. It usually means that I don't have to translate a lot of things into lay language. It also give them the opportunity to ask questions that a "normal" person might not ask, lab results for example. They're usually my best patients.

When I've been on the other side of the bed, I don't announce "I am a nurse!" But if they figure me out, that's ok. I almost feel like it's slightly dishonest to not let them know that I understand more than they think I do. I still expect to be treated like a regular patient.

When it's a loved one who is hospitalized, I may or may not let the staff know I'm a nurse. I know some nurses (ok, I'm thinking of one in particular) who are positively obnoxious when her family member was admitted. Not cool. Also, I find it hard not to help out when a family member is the patient. Staff is always busy and it's hard to let that IV pump beep but I do. I will toilet them or straighten up the bed and then stay out of their way.

Long Term Care Columnist / Guide · Sep 11, 2016

I can't get away with people not knowing I'm a nurse because I go to providers within the network where I used to work. Sometimes I wish that weren't the case, because I tend to go stupid when some medical problem affects me personally and need to be talked to as if I were a regular patient or family member.

When I was diagnosed with diabetes, I needed someone to educate me about the disease because suddenly I knew nothing about it. When I was diagnosed with bipolar, my psychiatrist literally had to explain what it was and the many ways it could be treated. And when my husband was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer, I was merely the horrified wife and not the calm and cool nurse. In all cases, the doctors spoke with me as a healthcare professional when I really needed plain talk about the issue at hand.

Buyer beware, BSN · Sep 12, 2016

Thanks for your response. Yes, I agree all patients deserve the same amount of respect. My suggestion to respect and love our colleagues was not to imply they deserve more than other patients but rather they shouldn't be resented for stating their profession, which is the vibe I got from posts written in different threads. I meant love in the sense of companionate love, expressing compassion and collegiality.

OP: When you're sick, I mean really sick, the facade of what you do for a living falls necessarily by the wayside. As such, you quite reluctantly take on the role of cancer, stroke, (dx. here) and are just like any other garden variety person in need of aid that is outside your control.

As far as "compassion" is concerned, while I respect your right to use the word, when I went to school we were taught to be "empathetic." This approach as I have learned down through the years seems to be more appropriate when you're dealing with folks who are not your mother, father, sister or brother or trusted friend and therefore you do not have a personal loving relationship with and not just a matter of semantics.

This notion, I believe, allows the word "compassion" to have meaning past the hospital corporations' silly pitch that they alone cornered the market on the word that is overused by nurses and hospital administrators alike to water down such an important quality found in some good natured homosapiens I have had the pleasure to know.

djh123 · Sep 12, 2016

I have told doctors and NP's that I'm a RN and there have been no problems whatsoever.

JadedCPN, BSN, RN · Sep 12, 2016

I personally do not go out of my way to disclose that I am a nurse when I am the sick patient or the family member of a sick patient, but as other posters have stated I am usually "found out" because of certain questions I ask, the way I act, and so on. Part of the reason that I don't disclose it is because in that particular case, I am not the nurse but rather the patient so I don't find it particularly relevant. And being a pediatric RN, I am by no means an expert when it comes to adult nursing. I would rather have things over-explained to me as a patient instead of under-explained to be as a nurse-patient.

OP, I do understand what you are coming from in terms of that respect across other professions such as firefighters, cops, physicians, etc. I always was fascinated with that "brotherhood" that so many seem to have. Perhaps why that isn't the case in nursing is because it is dealing with personal medical issues and people like their privacy? Who knows.