Possible new (nursing) drinking game

Specialties School

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Somebody help me out here. I'm seeing a great new nursing party drinking game. Something like every time you see a post title with !!!!, or ADN/BSN, or any derivative of NETY you have to toss one back. Any additions to the theme...?

Specializes in IMC, school nursing.
"my teacher says I have pink eye"

"I hit my head at recess"

"my mom said to call if I don't feel good"

Teacher: "well I'm not medical, so I sent them to you" - please note, this is the same teacher who will call a parent because a kid doesn't feel good

headache/stomachache "for a week"

Me: "did momma give you medicine this morning?"

Kid: "yes"

Me: "what colour was is?"

Kid: "orange"

ff 6 hours later and temp is now 101F

(classic dose and dash)

... but did dodge the absent bullet.

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Specializes in Med-surg, school nursing..

Dose and dash...Love it.

Or the kid who has blood pouring out of their nose, onto their arms, shirts, THE FLOOR.

Me: "Where were you when it started bleeding? Why no tissues for the geyser nose?

Old Faithful: "My teacher told me to come to you RIGHT NOW, I didn't have time."

((eye-roll)) Also, can anyone tell me why I only have a comment box and NOTHING else?

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"my nose just started bleeding"

...and presents you with a tissue with a pin point drop of blood...

or blood all over their finger from picking.

"I don't know what happened, my nose just started bleeding for no reason"

OR comes in with blood all over them and a teeny scrap of tissue whistling out of their nostril.

(7th grade boys, I'm looking at you!)

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Dose and dash...Love it.

Or the kid who has blood pouring out of their nose, onto their arms, shirts, THE FLOOR.

Me: "Where were you when it started bleeding? Why no tissues for the geyser nose?

Old Faithful: "My teacher told me to come to you RIGHT NOW, I didn't have time."

((eye-roll)) Also, can anyone tell me why I only have a comment box and NOTHING else?

Ooops, Yes.

Missed this, Sully.

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Specializes in Sub-Acute, School Nursing, Dialysis.

This post is truly awesome!!!! I have so many of these same scenarios!! Here are mine that keep popping into my office lately...

"My eyes are itchy!!" About majority of my visits yesterday were for red, itchy eyes due to allergies. Lots of eye drops!

"My teacher says I feel warm so I must have a fever!"

Almost summer time guys!!!!!

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((eye-roll)) Also, can anyone tell me why I only have a comment box and NOTHING else?

I have just the comment box too. If you go to "full editor" before posting, you will see the smileys and different options.

:wideyed: :bookworm: :sarcastic: :x3:

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Specializes in IMC, school nursing.
I have just the comment box too. If you go to "full editor" before posting, you will see the smileys and different options.

:wideyed: :bookworm: :sarcastic: :x3:

But that's a pain. We want the old way back.

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I am a triage nurse for an office.

"My child has a high fever!"

Temp is 99

I would be hammered.

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Specializes in Med-surg, school nursing..
I am a triage nurse for an office.

"My child has a high fever!"

Temp is 99

I would be hammered.

YES!!! And then when you explain that 99 is not a fever you get "Well, her temp is usually in the 97 range, so it's a fever for her."

No. Just no. :no:

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Specializes in School Nursing, Ambulatory Care, etc..

:roflmao:

I am a triage nurse for an office.

"My child has a high fever!"

Temp is 99

I would be hammered.

:wtf::roflmao::wtf:

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Specializes in Sub-Acute, School Nursing, Dialysis.

While on the topic, I dislike that saying, "nurses eat their young" so much!!! I kid you not, on one of my interviews, as soon as I sat down, the interviewer says, have you ever heard that nurses eat their young?! I was confused and mortified!! It wasn't until later in the interview process she realized I had some nursing experience and had four children (at the time) that I wasn't some fresh out of college kid. Am I weird that I love to help new nurses or nursing students??

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Specializes in Hospice, corrections, psychiatry, rehab, LTC.
Or "New grad, need day shift only/very specific schedule/want to work hospital will not work nights/want weekends off"

Someone makes a rational, practical and pragmatic suggestion: "You were offered a great residency on nights in Ortho at a fantastic hospital in fun place to live? Sure, take it"

New Grad: I will accept ED/PEDS/ICU only do not bully me!

Me: *Blink*

I love the ones who ask what it is like to work at a specific facility (or worse, a specific unit at a specific facility), what the pay is, how much overtime you can get, etc. I frequent the correctional nursing forum where this is rampant, but they appear elsewhere as well.

I was once accused of being rude and condescending because I told a new RN that she wasn't likely to find an employer who would pay off her $70K student loans in exchange for a 1-2 year commitment.

Positive response only, please! In other words, give me your opinion, unless it conflicts with mine. If you disagree with me, you're just being negative.

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