Options for childcare when mandated

William_SRNA · Sep 3, 2005

What type of nursing position or job do you have?

I'm currently in a CRNA program full time

LydiaNN · Sep 3, 2005

You might try finding other nurses at your facility that would be interested in forming a childcare coop. I know you said there's only one other person that you would trust your baby with, and I can certainly understand that feeling, but you may need to start networking with people now to get a sense of who else is worthy of your trust.

William_SRNA · Sep 3, 2005

there are plenty of corners to cut. Clip coupons, ge trid of the second car, find a job or start a home business. Work weekends if your husband is off. Get rid of the cell phones. There is always a way if you try hard enough. You are going to find once you start paying for daycare etc.. you aren't saving that much money. Another option is not to have a child until you are financially more stable. (my biggest suggestion especially since you say you are sick).

In regards to your comment that I placed in bold.
I live in a 3 bedroom/2 bath. We are a one car(ecoomy car) family. No boats, no pool, heck no cable TV, eat out once a month at a mom/pop store (bill comes to $6.50 a person.)
What we do have is student loans, poor health(me, and yes I have medical insurance, but $60-200 a week medical copays AFTER insurance, not counting meds ), a second car that doesn't have a warranty that's broke down till we have the $$$ to get it fixed.
I haven't been to a beauty shop to have a hair cut in over 6 months, I have 2 pairs of pants that fit, thank goodness my scrubs are drawstring waist. The only expense I have that is not a necessity is internet access, it's also my only luxory (sp). We don't buy fresh veggies, we grow them in the backyard, garden supplies majorityof vegetable needs. We've even considered selling the house and moving into a cheap apartment if my health fails again, and using the equity to pay more med bills.
Please tell me what corner's can be cut??? I don't think losing the internet is going to make such a difference that me or DH could quit a job and become a single income family.
Not every 2 income family lives above their means. Some are 2 income just to get by. :angryfire :angryfire
Don't think all got into this situation by spending recklessly.

elthia · Sep 3, 2005

From hoopjumper

there are plenty of corners to cut.

Clip coupon...already do that

ge trid of the second car...second car is parked, not running, actually only needs a new carb,put out ad's to sell, but noone's buying

find a job or start a home business...have a job, actually this household has 2, and not everyone is business savvy. I don't care for the added headache and bookkeeping involved, I would have to hire an accountant to do that for me.

Work weekends if your husband is off...would take a tremendous pay cut going to only weekends. We work opposite shifts anyways.

Get rid of the cell phones...don't have landline, found save $$$ with cell phone's free long distance because stepkids mom lives in a different area code

There is always a way if you try hard enough...believe me, am trying, and think I'm doing good, we were better off before and had more luxories before I had health problems, but all bills are paid on time, credit is not maxxed out. Rarely use credit cards. Usually try to stay 2+ months ahead on bills so that if I have to take medical leave, we don't have to use credit to eat. Am concerned about paying taxes on house but they'll get paid before they are late.

You are going to find once you start paying for daycare etc..you aren't saving that much money. Actually utilize a family member who is early retired for child care, all I pay is travel expenses, and cook a good dinner for them. They only watch the kids for 2 hours tops.

Another option is not to have a child until you are financially more stable. (my biggest suggestion especially since you say you are sick). Am not planning on having a child soon, but don't exactly want to get rid of the ones we already have.

I'm not the OP, but I'm just trying to make the point that not all families can afford to go single income, and it's not always because of poor financial planning. I didn't plan to spend almost $1000 a month medically. your post about the $200,000 dollar houses and boats rubbed me the wrong way because I don't know of many 2 income families that actually use those incomes to support that type of lifestyle. Most 2 income families I know would be close to poverty level without that second income. Maybe I just come from the wrong side of the tracks (sarcasm).

SmilingBluEyes · Sep 3, 2005

the op has a legitimate concern---even if we see it differently. i request advice being offered is in a helpful spirit, not a condescending tone. this violates the friendly debate tenet of the terms of service of the site, not to mention, inflames those having no choice but to work outside the home. i thank you for understanding.

Long Term Care Columnist / Guide · Sep 3, 2005

Look I am not trying to make you feel guilty. My point is simply that know one will care more for your child than yourself. My wife quit teaching when our son was born and now stays home fulltime. You can with one income make it. Maybe you don't need the $200,000 house the three cars the boat eating out all the time. There are always corners that can be cut. Somehow there is this terrible stigmatism that stay at home moms are disenfranchised or degrading. I know my son gets quality care at home doesn't act out we saw him first start to crawl to start talking to smile, we didn't hear about it from daycare or someone else. You will miss out so much on your child's expereinces when you put the in a daycare or with someone else. I personally think nothing is harder or more challenging than staying with your child. Like I mentioned before there are plenty of stay at home dads as well. No one is trying to degrade anyone but trying to bring up a widow into the situation is ridiculous every situation is different are you a widow?
Get a grip people no one is castigating you as worthless parents I am trying to offer an alternative you may not have looked at.
Hoop

Who's talking about $200,000 houses and three boats? Unless a family's main breadwinner earns at least $40-$50,000 a year, a second income is mandatory in most parts of the country, and that includes my little corner of the US where the average wage is around $12 an hour. :uhoh3:

You know, I really hate it when we get posts that seem to beg for a fight, stirring up bad feelings and making people feel guilty, especially for doing what they have to do to survive. Please, let's keep this debate civil, and more importantly, non-judgmental. Thank you. :stone

live4today, RN · Sep 3, 2005

The facility where I work enforces mandatory overtime.
My husband and I are anticipating having a child within the next 5 years.
A major concern of mine is being mandated and having no one to care for my child while my husband works. My family is miles away and the only other person I would trust with my child is a nurse herself and has her hands full with 2 mentally disabled children.
My question is - what do you do?
The facility does not have a daycare in house.
Thanks,
Shel

I don't know what others would do, but there is no way that I would work where an employer mandates overtime, especially if I were raising small children. It's still a choice to work where mandated overtime occurs, or choose a place that does not mandate overtime. Why would you stay at a place that mandates overtime if you have children or are contemplating motherhood at some point in your life????

whipping girl in 07, RN · Sep 4, 2005

Only place I've worked that had "mandatory" OT had a list where you signed up for 4 hrs a week or 8 hrs every 2 weeks as an extra shift. You knew in advance you might have to work because it was scheduled but it gave the unit a little cushion in case you had call-ins or unexpected high census. Where I work now we have to sign up for one 12 hr on-call shift on a weekend per 6 week schedule period (unless you're like me and work weekends only), you pick the shift and it's time and a half if you have to work. But at neither place, we were never mandated and not allowed to leave or told we would be fired if we didn't come in for an unscheduled shift.

ktwlpn, LPN · Sep 4, 2005

The facility where I work enforces mandatory overtime.
My husband and I are anticipating having a child within the next 5 years.
A major concern of mine is being mandated and having no one to care for my child while my husband works. My family is miles away and the only other person I would trust with my child is a nurse herself and has her hands full with 2 mentally disabled children.
My question is - what do you do?
The facility does not have a daycare in house.
Thanks,
Shel

Good for you-planning ahead is important.Nursing allows you to pick a shift.I worked evenings and my husband worked days when our son was born-I took 2 years off (I left work to take care of my mom-she left her house to my sister and I which was paid for)when he was 3 and then went back to work full time when he started first grade.I was never mandated because I volunteered when I was able-the ones that refused to ever help out then were mandated...Some of my friends go pool during their children's early years.They work when they can....If your husband can carry the benefits that is a great way to go.Totally leaving nursing for any length of time is not a good option IMHO-too tough to get back in....Good Luck

shel_wny · Sep 5, 2005

Good for you-planning ahead is important.Nursing allows you to pick a shift.I worked evenings and my husband worked days when our son was born-I took 2 years off (I left work to take care of my mom-she left her house to my sister and I which was paid for)when he was 3 and then went back to work full time when he started first grade.I was never mandated because I volunteered when I was able-the ones that refused to ever help out then were mandated...Some of my friends go pool during their children's early years.They work when they can....If your husband can carry the benefits that is a great way to go.Totally leaving nursing for any length of time is not a good option IMHO-too tough to get back in....Good Luck

Thanks! Exactly the kind of information and encouragement I was looking for. :)

Much appreciated,

Shel