any OB nurse worked with a gay nurse who has started to transtion into a female nurse

Specialties Ob/Gyn

Published

I know this a weird question to ask but I have been gay all my life and in the last few months I have come to find my true self and I'm going to start hormones soon and start living as " Amber " that mean dressing as her full time at work and my everyday life I have let everyone on my unit know what's going on and I have had a few of the girls on the unit go to my NM and say they will not work beside me... I love being a OB nurse but I'm sacred no one will work with me and worried that once I start work as "Amber" I'm going to be forced outta my job. Need some advice any one out there can help?

Specializes in OB-Gyn/Primary Care/Ambulatory Leadership.

I'm confused by the title, and I'm not trying to be snide - are you gay or are you transgender? Because my understanding is those are two discrete things.

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Specializes in Cardicac Neuro Telemetry.

Hi Amber. According to the ACLU, several states have laws banning discrimination of transgender people. Federal law, per the other article, also protects you. I am not a lawyer and I'm not trying to give you legal advice but the links I have posted are clear in what they say. I would consult with an attorney if you have any more questions or if you suffer any harassment or termination. You have rights and make sure to fight for them.

With all of that said, I commend you for having the courage to be yourself. I'm so sorry that there are still ignorant and mean spirited people like some of the nurses on your unit. As a pregnant woman, I don't care if the RN caring for me is transgender or not so long as he/she is nice, competent and capable. Your fellow RNs shouldn't care so long as you can do the job well and neither should your patients as long as you are giving them quality care!

http://www.aclu.org/translaw

http://transequality.org/Resources/EmploymentKnowYourRights_Sept2013.pdf

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Specializes in Critical Care, ED, Cath lab, CTPAC,Trauma.
Thank you everyone I have started crying I can't believe that all of you support me as a nurse thank you thank you very much I'm so speechless right now ty ty
Good for you! I worked with a cardiac surgeon who transitioned back in the mid 90's a more resent story was from 2007....Coming Sunday: A trusted doctor's sex change tests his patients - Boston Medical News - White Coat Notes - Boston.com

We only go around this life once live your true self! We are here for you ((HUGS))

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Specializes in Home Health (PDN), Camp Nursing.

My wife works at a small town news paper. Years ago in the early 90s one of their sales reps transitioned. There were supporters, and detractors. She had the support of the management, and just had to take the good with the bad. Once she had transitioned, she got a new job where no one knew, and to my knowldge lived happily ever after. Just keep moving forward. It will work out.

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I'm confused by the title, and I'm not trying to be snide - are you gay or are you transgender? Because my understanding is those are two discrete things.

Many people find their identities change throughout their lifetimes - for example, you may think of yourself as a student and a daughter when young, a nurse and a wife when working, a teacher and parent as you grow older, a grandparent and retiree eventually, etc. For example, after you graduate college, you may no longer think of yourself as a student, but for that period of time in your life, you were.

Sexual and gender identities can shift with time as well. Many young people will identify themselves as straight, then grow and realize they better identify as gay. Sometimes people know very early on that they are born in the wrong body -- sometimes, it takes a while, and they may identify as gay before they realize what is going on (or before they accept themselves). Sometimes, they are both gay and trans*! Sometimes they fall somewhere else, not easily identifiable to others.

In Amber's case, it seems like she used to be a gay man, and is now transitioning to be a woman. Neither one negates the other, they are just two different periods of life. Being a retiree later in life does not negate being a student earlier in life -- that was who you used to be, and this is who you are now.

I hope that rather clumsy analogy helped you! Identity and labels can be very tricky things.

To the OP, I hope I did not put words in your mouth. And while I have no advice or experience to offer, I do wish you the greatest luck with your peers and great congratulations!

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I just quit nursing for good all the nurses here expect for my 3 friends have file grievances against me. My life is over all I ever wanted to be was a L&D Nurse since I was 6 years old

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Specializes in CCU, SICU, CVSICU, Precepting & Teaching.
I just quit nursing for good all the nurses here expect for my 3 friends have file grievances against me. My life is over all I ever wanted to be was a L&D Nurse since I was 6 years old

Your life isn't over. This JOB may be over for you, but neither your life nor your nursing career is over. All nurses aren't like the ones you work with. You're about to become the person you were always meant to be.

Once you start living as Amber, you can find a new job -- maybe in L & D in a different hospital or even a different town. Don't give up now, when you're so close to having the life you wanted!

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Specializes in Cardicac Neuro Telemetry.
I just quit nursing for good all the nurses here expect for my 3 friends have file grievances against me. My life is over all I ever wanted to be was a L&D Nurse since I was 6 years old

They filed grievances against you? For what?! I second Ruby Vee's words. Your life is far from over. You got your degree, education and license. Don't let a group of ignorant people keep you from doing what you love.

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Specializes in Pediatrics, High-Risk L&D, Antepartum, L.
I just quit nursing for good all the nurses here expect for my 3 friends have file grievances against me. My life is over all I ever wanted to be was a L&D Nurse since I was 6 years old

Who cares what they filed? You turn around and hold your head high. You file a discrimination law suit if need be. Don't quit. Don't let idiots win. You are a strong woman ready to take on the world...do it.

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I may not personally like or agree with your lifestyle or wanting to be "Amber". However, if you were working with me at the bedside I would treat you NO Different than my other colleagues.

I hope everything goes well in your work place. If you have any issues with anyone, make sure you document and report it.

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Specializes in LTC.

Don't let a small handful of nurses stomp on your dreams. I know that right now you probably feel very vulnerable making the decision to transition is terrifying for most people that make it.

If you are facing hostility and discrimination from the other nurses on your floor go to HR.

Also talk to your therapist about what is going on. A therapist who is well versed in transgender issues can give you guidance for transitioning in the workplace.

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Specializes in Critical Care, ED, Cath lab, CTPAC,Trauma.

I'm sorry that you didn't receive the right support for this facility and your "friends" but that doesn't mean anything is "over". What did they file a grievance over?

There are laws that protect you and they are free to enforce.....Filing a Charge

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