Nursing Student Anxiety dealing with people

Hi all!

I started NS a few weeks ago and have yet to start the clinical component. I find the information/lecture part of the class highly interesting, as I love to learn, especially about diseases/mental nervous, stuff like that. I am actually very pleasantly suprised at how interesting it is and how fast ten hours of strait lecture can be!!!:chuckle HOWEVER, and that's a BIG HOWEVER, I am seriously becoming concerned that my personality is not going to jive with nursing. I am not much a people person. I'm a talker, but I don't really like to be around people or have much desire in helping them. (bear with me here, OK ). I get very anxious when I start thinking about having to touch patients and talk to patients, and, well, basically relate to them in any way! My anxiety too at performing the skills and check offs in school is VERY high...(my hands shake, I get flushed, etc) The hands on aspect of nursing is very scary for me and I get super anxious just thinking about it! I have been struggling with depression and have been socially isolated up until NS, but really my personality has been this way all my life.

I have taken tests that tell me I am not good with people, am much of a loner. Do you think I could ever change this part of my personality or am I just swimming upstream here?? Would I ever grow to enjoy nursing and truly be fulfilled by it? Psych nursing appeals but I don't know if that is just because I feel a little psycho right now.:rotfl:

Basically, if I am working against my personality, is there any way I can succeed or find a good "niche" in nursing or should I just cut my losses finally and get out and go into lab work or something?

I am just waiting for that light bulb to go off where I go, "WOW! This is really fulfilling for me, to help others without expecting anything in return!". Plus, I am so impatient with people. The other day I was watching Discovery Health and they had a 31 YO man on there with a diabetic foot ulcer. Well, his toes turned black and he ended up having to have his lower leg amputated. Well, the first thing I thought was "How could he have been so stupid to not change his diet/habits before his foot rotted off??" But I really didn't feel too much empathy. Now, maybe I would in person, but this still worries me... In CNA clinicals I did feel bad for the LTC residents but I did not want to touch them or talk to them really. I felt so, so, so incredibly akward.

Should I just bail or give it some more time?? I swear this is the absolute last time I am going to wonder about this!!!!

And don't ask me to do what I "really want to do" cuz I don't have a clue there!:chuckle Seriously.

I know I can go BSN or MSN and go into research or something less hands on but with a personality this extreme as far as social interaction goes, do you think I can even get thru school??

Thank you for sharing your opinions...

[Squaw]

The best advise that I can give you is to get out. Nursing is 95% heart and 5% knowledge. If you do not love being around people than you need to find something that would suit your personality. Sorry to be so blunt but we have too many nurses now that are only in it for the money and job security and not for the love of nursing. :angryfire

[sirI, MSN, APRN, NP]

Hi all!

I started NS a few weeks ago and have yet to start the clinical component. I find the information/lecture part of the class highly interesting, as I love to learn, especially about diseases/mental nervous, stuff like that. I am actually very pleasantly suprised at how interesting it is and how fast ten hours of strait lecture can be!!!:chuckle HOWEVER, and that's a BIG HOWEVER, I am seriously becoming concerned that my personality is not going to jive with nursing. I am not much a people person. I'm a talker, but I don't really like to be around people or have much desire in helping them. (bear with me here, OK ). I get very anxious when I start thinking about having to touch patients and talk to patients, and, well, basically relate to them in any way! My anxiety too at performing the skills and check offs in school is VERY high...(my hands shake, I get flushed, etc) The hands on aspect of nursing is very scary for me and I get super anxious just thinking about it! I have been struggling with depression and have been socially isolated up until NS, but really my personality has been this way all my life.

I have taken tests that tell me I am not good with people, am much of a loner. Do you think I could ever change this part of my personality or am I just swimming upstream here?? Would I ever grow to enjoy nursing and truly be fulfilled by it? Psych nursing appeals but I don't know if that is just because I feel a little psycho right now.:rotfl:

Basically, if I am working against my personality, is there any way I can succeed or find a good "niche" in nursing or should I just cut my losses finally and get out and go into lab work or something?

I am just waiting for that light bulb to go off where I go, "WOW! This is really fulfilling for me, to help others without expecting anything in return!". Plus, I am so impatient with people. The other day I was watching Discovery Health and they had a 31 YO man on there with a diabetic foot ulcer. Well, his toes turned black and he ended up having to have his lower leg amputated. Well, the first thing I thought was "How could he have been so stupid to not change his diet/habits before his foot rotted off??" But I really didn't feel too much empathy. Now, maybe I would in person, but this still worries me... In CNA clinicals I did feel bad for the LTC residents but I did not want to touch them or talk to them really. I felt so, so, so incredibly akward.

Should I just bail or give it some more time?? I swear this is the absolute last time I am going to wonder about this!!!!

And don't ask me to do what I "really want to do" cuz I don't have a clue there!:chuckle Seriously.

I know I can go BSN or MSN and go into research or something less hands on but with a personality this extreme as far as social interaction goes, do you think I can even get thru school??

Thank you for sharing your opinions...

Well, huh, I am not sure I have ever had anyone explain their struggle with human suffering and the indifference they felt.

I think that at this time in your life you may be better suited in another profession entirely void of nursing and/or medicine.

[zambezi, BSN, RN]

The best advise that I can give you is to get out. Nursing is 95% heart and 5% knowledge. If you do not love being around people than you need to find something that would suit your personality. Sorry to be so blunt but we have too many nurses now that are only in it for the money and job security and not for the love of nursing. :angryfire

I have to respectfully disagree with your statements...I would have a couple of questions for you...

you mentioned CNA work...did you just go through the classes or actually work as a CNA

Money is obviously tight for most people, but do you have enough to get through one clinical component? since you don't know what else you want to do, sticking with it can't hurt you...and if you find out that you hate it- you can leave...

I disagree with nursing is 95% heart and 5% knowledge...where I work there is alot more knoweldge involved than that- and our physicians expect that we use it (I would guess that it is this way in most facilities)...Nursing is, of course, about working with people too, but I don't think that you will make a poor nurse if you are in it for the money or the hours...but I do think that you will have to work on your interaction with others if it is a uncomfortable as you say it is so you don't hate your job...nursing requires a lot of educating other about their lifestyles, new changes, etc...while it is okay not to agree with how others choose to conduct themselves, you need to find the balance on how and when to tell someone else that- and the fact is is that you probably won't change them...you just educate and hope that some of that message goes home with that person and their family and that they begin to make small changes. Many people get anxious when they think of working with other people in such an "intimate" way (not sexually here people...) and that is normal- the question is is whether it is too big of a hurdle for you to work though...if it is, then I agree- mabye nursing isn't for you...you need to sit down and take a look at yourself- why did you choose to get into nursing in the first place? make a pros and cons list for yourself- if there are more cons mabye you need to look around...if the cons are something that you feel that you can work on (with out having a major breakdown yourself)- then stay in the program for another semester and see if your anxieties ease...most new people have anxiety about the skills and interactions with others- and both get easier as you learn the environment, the skills, and what your role is...

so I guess that doesn't really answer your questions, but no one here can answer it for you...just remember that you come first, keep yourself healthy (mentally and physically) and know that all new nursing students have the same fears about skills labs and the interaction with others and how they will react to it.

[jamaicanRN]

wow, leave now while you still can because if ur only in it for research then find another path, bio or chem maybe, but if you can't have empathy towards the patient then there is no point

[utahliz]

You say that you've been struggling with depression. That could certainly color your feelings about most any situation, not to mention anxiety-producing events. In my experience, it can often increase irritability and decrease one's sensitivity to others, in addition to the more commonly-known symptoms.

What you don't say is why you chose nursing school. What led you to believe that nursing is an appropriate career choice for you? Perhaps you really are not suited, and you could find what you're looking for in another career. But you should know that you're not alone in feeling terrified at approaching a patient, doing assessments or any other hands-on interventions, and compassion is not always the first emotion a nurse feels towards his/her patients.

You can grow and change. You can become more comfortable with things that bother you. However, what drives a person from the inside tends not to change. I'm quite shy by nature, and much prefer small groups. I was terrified the first 10 or 20 times I had to approach a patient, and though it's easier now, I'm still terrified when there's a nurse or clinical instructor in there with me. I've got several conversation-opening questions I ask, and once I establish some common ground or just get to know the person a bit better, the conversation begins to flow.

As for attitude toward patients, really trying to understand what their life is like helps a great deal. It's not easy to lose weight, for instance. Even if all it came down to was sheer willpower, not everyone has the same amount. But it's more complicated than that. Some are in denial, some can't deal with the issues for various reasons, some just need more time or the right kind of support, and some are making a conscious decision. Many medications contribute to weight gain. In some cases, even the doc is not providing the education, treatment and motivation the patient needs to change their health care behavior. But they are suffering, and deserve compassionate care. If you give up on them, their chances of becoming compliant decrease even further. It may be a matter of finding the right motivation, or just chipping away at it, hoping that eventually they'll come around.

I would urge you to examine your reasons for going to nursing school and, if you still think there's a chance it might be right for you, stick it out through your first class with clinicals. (I do hope you're being treated for your depression.) As frightened as I was, it turned out that clinical days were my best days--always something different and always a chance to make a difference in some small way. Good luck to you.

[mstigerlily]

If you really don't like touching people, talking to people or being around people, I don't see how you could like being a nurse. Trying to think of RN type jobs where you don't have to deal with people and can't really think of any. Even in administration you have to deal with employees and patients - maybe not touching them I guess but still...

Melissa

Hi all!

I started NS a few weeks ago and have yet to start the clinical component. I find the information/lecture part of the class highly interesting, as I love to learn, especially about diseases/mental nervous, stuff like that. I am actually very pleasantly suprised at how interesting it is and how fast ten hours of strait lecture can be!!!:chuckle HOWEVER, and that's a BIG HOWEVER, I am seriously becoming concerned that my personality is not going to jive with nursing. I am not much a people person. I'm a talker, but I don't really like to be around people or have much desire in helping them. (bear with me here, OK ). I get very anxious when I start thinking about having to touch patients and talk to patients, and, well, basically relate to them in any way! My anxiety too at performing the skills and check offs in school is VERY high...(my hands shake, I get flushed, etc) The hands on aspect of nursing is very scary for me and I get super anxious just thinking about it! I have been struggling with depression and have been socially isolated up until NS, but really my personality has been this way all my life.

I have taken tests that tell me I am not good with people, am much of a loner. Do you think I could ever change this part of my personality or am I just swimming upstream here?? Would I ever grow to enjoy nursing and truly be fulfilled by it? Psych nursing appeals but I don't know if that is just because I feel a little psycho right now.:rotfl:

Basically, if I am working against my personality, is there any way I can succeed or find a good "niche" in nursing or should I just cut my losses finally and get out and go into lab work or something?

I am just waiting for that light bulb to go off where I go, "WOW! This is really fulfilling for me, to help others without expecting anything in return!". Plus, I am so impatient with people. The other day I was watching Discovery Health and they had a 31 YO man on there with a diabetic foot ulcer. Well, his toes turned black and he ended up having to have his lower leg amputated. Well, the first thing I thought was "How could he have been so stupid to not change his diet/habits before his foot rotted off??" But I really didn't feel too much empathy. Now, maybe I would in person, but this still worries me... In CNA clinicals I did feel bad for the LTC residents but I did not want to touch them or talk to them really. I felt so, so, so incredibly akward.

Should I just bail or give it some more time?? I swear this is the absolute last time I am going to wonder about this!!!!

And don't ask me to do what I "really want to do" cuz I don't have a clue there!:chuckle Seriously.

I know I can go BSN or MSN and go into research or something less hands on but with a personality this extreme as far as social interaction goes, do you think I can even get thru school??

Thank you for sharing your opinions...

[Charlotte M. Davis]

My first suggestion is DO NOT QUIT before you know for sure it is the right decision. I have to applaud you for even having the courage to tell your story and seek advise in this forum. Recognizing there is a problem is a wonderful first start at problem-solving. It also sounds like you have been analzying the parts of the problem as well.

My second suggestion is GET TREATMENT for your depression. That combined with your social isolation may be the route cause of your problem. You sound like you have never had experiences in dealing with other people because of the social isolation. I have seen patients totally change personality wise after being diagnosed and treated for depression. Joining a club, church, or volunteer in a group situation will help you with the social isolation.

My third suggestion is to ANALYZE WHAT lead you to enter the nursing profession. There must be something that steered you in this direction. DO NOT believe in all the tests you may have takenespecially if they are not conducted by professionals. EVERY profession has some element of dealing with people so you will need to learn those skills first regardless of what you do. If you still feel nursing is for you, then go for it.

[casi, ASN, RN]

When I did my CNA clinicals that was the hardest part for me too. Getting in and working with the people. I know personally what scared me the most was doing such personal things for a person. With time you get use to it though. I would suggest getting a job as a CNA, maybe everyother weekend or something simular, just so you can get your toes wet and get use to the people. I think you'll find that you like it. You can learn so much from a book, but it's never the same until you see it up close.

To those who are saying telling her to quit, just take a moment to remember the first time you had to work with a pacient and the nerves that came from it.

Good Luck

[amber1142]

Why did you decide to become a nurse? What was it that drew you to the field? I ask because if your motivations are in the right place, things like nervousness and uncertainty about your abilities can be overcome. (Almost everyone is scared of skills check-off. The first day of clinicals is scary for almost everyone; it takes time to get used to touching people. It takes time to find your authority and to grow into your role.) You could learn and grow tremendously as a person from this experience. If you don't have any interest in caring for and teaching your patients, however, that cannot be overcome, and you should probably choose another field. Even though there are nursing careers that don't involve patient care, you will have to put in the time doing patient care in school and as a new nurse. Your patients deserve someone who is willing to give them the best possible care.

[bellarosa]

I would not consider myself to be a people person either. I prefer to work by myself and not talk to anyone. I find the ICU where most patients are ventilated to be a good fit for me. Don't get me wrong, I care deeply about people, I'm just not talkative and I feel awkward around new people. I do like caring for patients and doing all I can for them, I would just prefer not to converse with them.

My advice would be to see how clinicals go. See if you care about these patients when you are taking care of them. You may find you have a big heart. That will help lead you to where you should be.

There are plenty of jobs for those of us that aren't bubbly, talkative, and extroverted. You may want to consider the icu environment, the legal side of nursing, and other possibilities.

[SarasotaRN2b]

Hi all!

I started NS a few weeks ago and have yet to start the clinical component. I find the information/lecture part of the class highly interesting, as I love to learn, especially about diseases/mental nervous, stuff like that. I am actually very pleasantly suprised at how interesting it is and how fast ten hours of strait lecture can be!!!:chuckle HOWEVER, and that's a BIG HOWEVER, I am seriously becoming concerned that my personality is not going to jive with nursing. I am not much a people person. I'm a talker, but I don't really like to be around people or have much desire in helping them. (bear with me here, OK ). I get very anxious when I start thinking about having to touch patients and talk to patients, and, well, basically relate to them in any way! My anxiety too at performing the skills and check offs in school is VERY high...(my hands shake, I get flushed, etc) The hands on aspect of nursing is very scary for me and I get super anxious just thinking about it! I have been struggling with depression and have been socially isolated up until NS, but really my personality has been this way all my life.

I have taken tests that tell me I am not good with people, am much of a loner. Do you think I could ever change this part of my personality or am I just swimming upstream here?? Would I ever grow to enjoy nursing and truly be fulfilled by it? Psych nursing appeals but I don't know if that is just because I feel a little psycho right now.:rotfl:

Basically, if I am working against my personality, is there any way I can succeed or find a good "niche" in nursing or should I just cut my losses finally and get out and go into lab work or something?

I am just waiting for that light bulb to go off where I go, "WOW! This is really fulfilling for me, to help others without expecting anything in return!". Plus, I am so impatient with people. The other day I was watching Discovery Health and they had a 31 YO man on there with a diabetic foot ulcer. Well, his toes turned black and he ended up having to have his lower leg amputated. Well, the first thing I thought was "How could he have been so stupid to not change his diet/habits before his foot rotted off??" But I really didn't feel too much empathy. Now, maybe I would in person, but this still worries me... In CNA clinicals I did feel bad for the LTC residents but I did not want to touch them or talk to them really. I felt so, so, so incredibly akward.

Should I just bail or give it some more time?? I swear this is the absolute last time I am going to wonder about this!!!!

And don't ask me to do what I "really want to do" cuz I don't have a clue there!:chuckle Seriously.

I know I can go BSN or MSN and go into research or something less hands on but with a personality this extreme as far as social interaction goes, do you think I can even get thru school??

Thank you for sharing your opinions...

You know, I had the same feelings. I'd actually been on the fence (for years!) because although I know I'll enjoy the lectures but I was scared (silly huh?) of the patients as if they were aliens or something. I just took a job as a health unit coordinator on a med/surg floor, and what I have discovered is that this are people just like people I know that are sick and scared. They are going from independent people, to people who must rely on others to do the simplest of everyday life. Just last week a bathroom call light went on, I checked and it just needed to be turned off. In one of the beds was a man my dad's age, who was just getting into bathroom and needed assistance pulling up his blanket. Just helping him with that little thing made my heart swell that I can do something to help him.

Don't give up...I, too, have suffered from depression and anxiety, but have been treated with Lexapro. Talk to someone, and keep with the nursing. You may surprise yourself.

Kris