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I am just curious as to how many of us came from a dysfunctional family. When I say dysfunctional, I mean children of alcholics, drug addicts, mental illness, child abuse whether it be physical or emotional. I read years ago that 75% of all nurses come from this type of environment. Is it true? Let me be the first to say "Yes"
Well my dysfunctional family happens to come from divorce or I should say divorces. After my parents split my dad got remarried and then my mom got remarried. Then my mom got divorced again, then my dad got divorced. Now my dad is remarried and my mom is single. That is 3 divorces that I was a child in. That was dysfunctional!!!!
parental home was not dysfunctional..father worked for railroad and mother was a sahm and both were happy with their roles, moved around a lot due to nature of his job but a kid considers what happens as normal..don't remember parents ever having a loud argument
marriage was as dysfuncitonal as is possible for a marriage to be: he was a heavy drinker and a control freak and i became an enabler unti it became intolerable...i prayed for my marriage to be healed and it wasn't until much later that i realized that the separation was the best thing possible or our children and eventually for me God has a way of taking care of us when we don't have enough sense to take care of ourselves
however i find that 75% of nurse hard to believe..nurses go into the profession for many different reasons, being in a family w/health care members, being sick or having a loved one sick and admiring the caregivers,
serendipity just drifting in with a friend who is taking the course, financial concerns, lots more different spins
sometimes it is not important on how you get someplace as what you do when yo get there
here's a toast to all of us
Am I the only nurse then that grew up in a happy home? No drinking or drugs, no divorce, happy married parents, etc.
The whole family still gets together every Sunday afternoon for lunch. I visit my folks every week, an my kids love their grandparents. I am actually looking forward to the 2 family reunions this summer. My husband is from a very functional family also.
Not bragging, but there are nurses from functional families out there.
A picture of my family should be in the dictionary beside the word dysfunctional. My father was an abusive alchoholic who was a control freak. My mother had several mental issues including several attempted suicides and lots of extramarital affairs. I was always trying to figure out which came first. Did my Dad drink because my mother was so hard to live with or did my mother's mental issues stem from my Dad's drinking? I give all of the credit to my grandmother for me even surviving my childhood. I do know that I truly loved my psyche rotation. I guess it's because I had already seen lots of examples of psyche problems on a firsthand basis.
oh yes, major dysfunction here....Mom has axis II diagnoses, dad was depressed and was and still is an active alcoholic, we were on food stamps intermittently and other kinds of public assistances. As an added bonus, I grew up in a rat and roach infested trailer home. Multiple close relatives with schizophrenia, bipolar, substance abuse and other mental illnesses.
I suffered through all the various forms of abuse, was kicked out by parents and sent to foster care for a period of time (as did 2 other siblings). only 3 out of 6 of us kids graduated from high school. 4/6 kids are currently on antidepressants, 1 sibling is a recovering drug addict.
I am the only one to obtain a 4 year degree and the only one that has been able to sustain a healthy relationship. I credit this to the years of therapy that I have been through which started when I was 15 because mom said I "was the one with the problem" . Therapist assured me this wasn't the case and that I was actually responding normally to an abnormal situation.
Currently, I consider myself to be pretty normal and pretty happy. I do however have a very sarcastic and dry sense of humor which I think is a coping mechanism from the dysfunction I grew up in.
I work mostly in correctional nursing so I guess growing up with dysfunction was good practice for my job. I never really had a burning desire to be a nurse, I actually partially chose it because it was a profession respected by my extended family. The few female relatives that "made it" chose to be nurses. Also, the job market for nursing was good and there were so many different areas I could go into that I figured I would find one that suited me and, I did.
Tweety, BSN, RN
36,347 Posts
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