I'm sorry. I really, really need to vent. I work for a pediatric private duty nursing agency, and I'm an RN. This is what I wish I could say to my new patient's mom: Why the heck would you ask your child's new night nurse to do her laundry?! When the hell did they put laundry questions on the NCLEX? Oh, yeah, they DIDN'T because NURSES AREN'T MAIDS! I'm not your kid's nanny, I'm a healthcare PROFESSIONAL - just like a physician. You wouldn't ask your pediatrician to do your kid's laundry, so you better not ask the nurse to do it, either! It's not 1950, anymore, Sparky!
Of course, I didn't say that. To be nice, I folded the kid's clothes tonight, but then I sent off an email to the clinical director at the agency complaining profusely about this insulting request. I mean, seriously! Where do people get the brass testicles to ask a nurse to do a maid's job?
Why do people automatically assume when they get private duty nursing covered by the state or their insurance that whoever is paying for it also thinks it's cool to provide you with housekeeping services? Isn't that insurance fraud? THe state doesn't want to pay for someone to do your kid's laundry. You can't ask me to do that! Not only is it DEGRADING to ask a healthcare professional to do laundry, it must be abuse of services. I hope to God above that no one at my agency told this woman that nurses do chores, because I will go all the way to the top of national corporate management if someone did. This better be an unfortunate misunderstanding on my patient's mom's part as to what nurses do and DO NOT do.
Has anyone else had to deal with this? I had one other patient's mom ask me if that was something we do, and she totally apologized for asking when I politely told her no. This new patient's mom guided me to the laundry room to make sure I understood how the machines work because she is assuming it's totally in my job description to do laundry. She didn't even ask, she just started out with "when you do her laundry..." Excuse me?! I clean the kid and his or her medical equipment. Nothing else! I'm not a home health aide (whose job it would possibly be). It's just not *my* job to do household chores!
OK, vent over. I feel a little better. Thanks for letting me vent.
I remember when my mother in law was dying of cancer at the age of 58. Her breast cancer had spread to her spine, leaving her unable to walk. Her husband was on the waiting list for a double lung transplant. Even with his horrible health, he tried to work at his small business every day. Because the children lived out of town/out of state, my MIL needed a nurse at least 12 hours a day for the first 3 months after her diagnosis. The last two months required 24/7 care. They spent every dime they had on good nursing care, and my husband and his sister lost their inheritance to pay for that care. It was worth every penny.
There was an issue of a certain nurse who didn't want to do light laundry and light house work. When calling agencies to find a perfect fit, my father in law made sure he explained how great his need was (waiting for lungs and very ill himself), and that his wife was in a wheelchair, had cancer etc. They assured him that their nurses do light chores and laundry after all patient care has been done. Well...this particular nurse didn't just NOT do those things, she was rude and ugly about it. She also left my wheelchair bound MIL alone for about 5 hours because she was asked to start the dishwasher. Needless to say, the agency fired her.
It can not be stated enough...know the terms of service. People assume too much about nurses and the agencies that send them out. Ask questions and be clear. And most importantly, if the patient or the nurse find themselves at an impass, stay classy.
Specializes in Pediatric Private Duty; Camp Nursing.
My husband and I had a conversation about this topic earlier today. I told him about how some nurses feel it's not their job and become offended at being asked to do more than skilled nursing. The way we see it, home health aides do all those things like laundry, light housekeeping, etc. but if the need is greater than HHA and skilled nursing is required in the home, then if time allows, that nurse should double as an HHA when skilled nursing duties are complete. I have a young adult quad client w type 2 SMA, and she has an HHA during the day, skilled nursing at night. She absolutely needs someone to do her laundry, prepare her meals, do light housekeeping for her bathroom and bedroon, etc. and I am glad to do these things for her. She tries to get her HHA to do most of it but sometimes she needs things done during my shift and I graciously comply with all her wishes.
In a facility, there's no time for a nurse to do these things and it is not appropriate for anyone to expect the skilled nurse to do them. However, in the home setting, the nurse has ONE client. And even though it doesn't pay as much as facility work, we're still getting paid a lot of money for a shift that often includes, let's face it, a LOT of down time, especially on overnights. Why not throw a load of laundry in the washer? Why not wipe down a sink or cook a meal? Private duty is a very personal assignment. I've developed some very close, rewarding friendships with clients and their families, despite my attempts to remain distant and professional. It's a special type of job, you become family with some of these people. I think it's worth it to do a bit more for these people who truly appreciate it. Not only that, times are tough, and families can often pick and choose which nurses they want back. If families like and feel comfortable with me, I'll get all the shifts I need to pay my bills. And I do.
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One of the biggest parts of my job, I feel, is giving these parents some respite from the overbearing reality of their lives. My parents are in various stages of grief for their children who will never be "normal", never be self-sufficient. I cannot imagine how overwhelming every moment of their lives must be. To refuse light housekeeping related to their child seems arrogant and cold to me. But that's just how I roll, I guess.
Me, personally, I do not think it's right to ask nurses to do laundry or other housework. I think it also depends on the individual situation. A case that I worked for over a year - the Dad expected the night shift nurses to fold and put away his daughter's laundry. (The washer/dryer was in an off-limits area or he probably would have expected us to wash and dry it, too.) He was a stay at home dad for the duration of my time there. He did NOTHING with this kid. ZERO interaction! Day shifts nurses often told me that all he did was watch TV or play games. Mom would go to work full-time, come home, cook, clean, wash/dry the laundry, come in and interact with the girl. Why can the dad not do the laundry? Medicaid paid for nursing services - so my tax money is funding the laundry service. If they both worked, or it was a single family household, I could probably talk myself into being more willing to do the laundry. Of course, his attitude didn't help AT ALL.
My family would never in a million years ask me to fold laundry, but I honestly wouldn't mind doing it or other light housework. It would help me stay awake.
This isn't a laundry issue but it does bother me when I come on duty and the child has a dirty diaper that she's obviously been in for a WHILE. Yes, changing diapers is part of the care I provide, but gee-whiz, if your kid poops BEFORE the nurse comes on duty, don't wait for the nurse to come and change it.[/quote']
I feel for anybody who thinks Dr. Gregory House is a hero.?
If that was a serious statement from the OP, I honestly don't even know what to say.
"I am NOT subservient to my patient's parents. I don't OWE them respect or have to do ANYTHING they say!"
Kyasi
Interesting. Your agency must love you.
The comment I was disturbed by was "I don't OWE them respect or have to do ANYTHING they say!" No matter how you feel about what a parent/patient asks of you, above all, I feel that they should be treated with dignity and respect.
Kyasi
I agree, Kyasi.
Demanding an RN or LPN to do laundry/clean is a very poor use of their time and skills.
I would not ask my plumber to do my laundry, I would not ask my electrictian to organize my closet.
I think the parents that DEMAND it are fewer than we're being led to believe.
My first week of working as a pediatric home health nurse I was trained by the previous nurse. I could not believe that the mother has the nurses do the laundry. Not only the child's laundry(which is still not the nurses responsibility) but also the family's laundry. And fold the mothers thongs and husbands underwear. That's when I refused and only folded the patients clothes.
OK, now the thongs I can understand.
To the OP: how's the weather up there on that high horse?
Specializes in Peds/outpatient FP,derm,allergy/private duty.
I trust that most of us can make the judgement for themselves as to whether or not they are being taken advantage of. Which makes sense as the only thing I'm sure of is that generalizing is impossible in PDN as is declaring that any nurse has a personality problem if they object to a situation we are not familiar with.
Each state administers Medicaid programs themselves and with tight funding would rather pay an HHA if the family needs assistance there. The contracts I've seen between the agency and the client state the nurse is not responsible for family housework or babysitting siblings. I know nobody, including myself, who strictly adheres to that...and economic pressures are always at play especially lately!
whitsinn
9 Posts
I remember when my mother in law was dying of cancer at the age of 58. Her breast cancer had spread to her spine, leaving her unable to walk. Her husband was on the waiting list for a double lung transplant. Even with his horrible health, he tried to work at his small business every day. Because the children lived out of town/out of state, my MIL needed a nurse at least 12 hours a day for the first 3 months after her diagnosis. The last two months required 24/7 care. They spent every dime they had on good nursing care, and my husband and his sister lost their inheritance to pay for that care. It was worth every penny.
There was an issue of a certain nurse who didn't want to do light laundry and light house work. When calling agencies to find a perfect fit, my father in law made sure he explained how great his need was (waiting for lungs and very ill himself), and that his wife was in a wheelchair, had cancer etc. They assured him that their nurses do light chores and laundry after all patient care has been done. Well...this particular nurse didn't just NOT do those things, she was rude and ugly about it. She also left my wheelchair bound MIL alone for about 5 hours because she was asked to start the dishwasher. Needless to say, the agency fired her.
It can not be stated enough...know the terms of service. People assume too much about nurses and the agencies that send them out. Ask questions and be clear. And most importantly, if the patient or the nurse find themselves at an impass, stay classy.